This bride’s wedding request has everyone confused and fuming!

Weddings are a time of joy, celebration, and the coming together of family and friends to mark a significant milestone in a couple's life.

However, the traditional expectations surrounding weddings are evolving, and not always in ways that sit comfortably with everyone.

In a tale that has left many shaking their heads in disbelief, a bride's recent request sparked a heated debate about wedding etiquette and the boundaries of gift-giving.


The story begins with a couple who decided to elope in secret, foregoing the usual fanfare of a wedding ceremony with guests.

Post-elopement, the bride took to a popular Facebook group to seek advice on a rather unconventional wedding gift approach.

She wanted to send out announcement cards with a strange request that confused the group members.

The bride's post read: 'I wanted to add a QR code that’s linked to a registry or something where they can either buy a gift or give money to go towards the downpayment on our house and add a sentence or two explaining it. How would you go about adding/asking?'


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Marriages are a one-of-a-kind celebration that requires thorough planning to ensure the comfort of enjoyment of the couple, their families, and guests. Image Credit: Bui Huy/Pexels


The reactions were swift and unforgiving.

Commenters on the post labelled the request as 'tacky', with many pointing out the apparent faux pas of asking for gifts without hosting a wedding celebration.

'If you’re eloping in secret, doesn’t that kind of forfeit the ability to get gifts?' one person asked.

'My husband and I eloped (not in secret) and expected absolutely nothing from anyone. I couldn’t imagine asking for gifts when you didn’t even invite anyone to the wedding,' another added.

The controversy didn't end there.


Another bride faced backlash for charging guests to attend her wedding.

The invitation outlined several RSVP options, including a $65 'envelope fee' to cover food, music, decorations, and the venue.

The guest who shared this story on social media revealed that despite the couple being financially well-off, she knew it was coming.

‘I always knew she was cheap, so in some ways I am not surprised,’ she said.

Additional costs were listed for a pre-wedding dinner and overnight accommodation at the venue, potentially racking up a bill of at least $300 per guest, not including the cost of an outfit or a gift.

'I suspect they can afford both the renovation and the wedding; they are just trying to play it safe,' she added.

'She also told me her goal is to be rich.'


The online community rallied behind the guest, with many calling the bride's actions 'tasteless and tacky', and left suggestions for the guest.

‘I would send my regrets and my congratulations and that’s it. The bride is out of her freaking mind,’ one commented.

‘Just decline. Say you’re busy that day. You won’t be the only one,’ another added.

‘RSVP to miss the whole thing and send her an etiquette book as a wedding gift,’ a third person added, poking fun at the situation.

These stories raise important questions about the expectations of wedding gifts and the financial burden placed on guests.

While it's customary for guests to offer gifts to celebrate a marriage, the assumption that one is entitled to such offerings, especially in the absence of a traditional ceremony, is a point of contention.

For those who have likely seen many weddings in their time, these modern-day wedding woes might seem worlds away from the traditions you're familiar with.

It's a reminder that while times change, the principles of courtesy and respect remain timeless.
Key Takeaways

  • A bride has received backlash for requesting money towards a house downpayment as a wedding gift after eloping in secret.
  • Commenters on a Facebook page criticised the bride's request as 'tacky' and inappropriate, given that no guests were invited to the wedding.
  • Another bride faced criticism for charging guests a fee to attend her wedding, with the expense covering food, music, decorations, and the venue.
  • Guests were further expected to contribute to a dinner cost before the wedding day and accommodation fees if they wished to stay at the venue, with the potential total cost for a guest reaching at least $300, not including a gift or an outfit.
Have you encountered any wedding gift requests that took you by surprise? Share your stories and opinions in the comments below!
 
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Heck no, if they decided to elope rather than have a ceremony, then they shouldn't expect gifts. What do people think we're all that gullible? If people want to give them a gift, then so be it but don't expect it, how rude!
 
I keep hearing about people being called "woke" and it is a term I have never understood - until now {I think}, it seems these couples really want everyone else to pay for things they properly don't need but want it all without doing the hard yards.
 
A friend of mine years ago asked her wedding guests to pay for their meal instead of giving a gift. The couple had been living together for a few years and had pretty much everything they needed for their house. Drinks were supplied by the couple and their families. The cost of the meal which was cooked onsite by a catering firm was $25 a head, which was much less than any sort of present would have been. No one complained about this and some still gave a gift. It was very much enjoyed by everyone who attended.
 
What my daughters and sons put on their wedding invitations was ' We don't need gifts as we have everything and your presence mean more to us than anything, but if you want to give something then there will be a wishing well . Thank you

Everyone gave a card with money in it . And everyone was happy

They had great food, great music and great entertainment
 
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A (former) friend asked my opinion on her daughter's wedding gift requesting a donation for the couple's honeymoon. I gather that she and the daughter didn't appreciate my answer when I told them that the guests shouldn't be paying for the honeymoon, and maybe they should reword the invitations. Consequently, we didn't get an invite to the wedding and the marriage was short lived, anyway.
 
I keep hearing about people being called "woke" and it is a term I have never understood - until now {I think}, it seems these couples really want everyone else to pay for things they properly don't need but want it all without doing the hard yards.
I still don't understand "woke". It used to be "I woke up in the morning". Is this another lucicrous Yanky idea? As for the greed of this person... tell them to muck off.
 
A (former) friend asked my opinion on her daughter's wedding gift requesting a donation for the couple's honeymoon. I gather that she and the daughter didn't appreciate my answer when I told them that the guests shouldn't be paying for the honeymoon, and maybe they should reword the invitations. Consequently, we didn't get an invite to the wedding and the marriage was short lived, anyway.
A friend was still overseas when she married and told the wedding guests that because they were coming to Australia to live, they didn't want any gifts. The guests gave money, instead of gifts and this was in 1997
 
I am opposed to the idea of actually giving cash in a wedding card….I’m happy to place gift cards in the card at a chosen store..
Many times I have heard “we used the money we received at our wedding for our honeymoon”
A (former) friend asked me what I thought of her daughter asking for money donations towards the honeymoon instead of giving a gift. I told her that the guests shouldn't be paying for the honeymoon so she shouldn't put that on the invitation. I didn't get an invite to the wedding, of which I was rather grateful, and the marriage only lasted a couple of years, anyway.
 

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