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Jonathan Leane

Jonathan Leane

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Punishment: gone too far, or fair enough? Internet is divided on whether it is ever okay to make your child eat from dirty dishes

This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

shutterstock_96697120.jpg
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
 
Last edited:
Natural consequences in action!! If you don’t do the dishes properly then the consequence is that you eat off dirty dishes. If everyone contributes to the mess, everyone contributes to the cleaning up. But why wait till he was 17 before addressing the issue?
 
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This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

View attachment 4139
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
Absolutely perfect! And for those going on about the possibility of him getting sick, consider this: babies put the most disgusting things in their mouths and happily survive. Many people living in third world countries would probably never see a clean plate, but their health isn’t affected.

Kids are as tough as old boots. It does them no good when parents fuss around them as though they’re made of glass.
 
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Well it worked didn't it? You are preparing your son to be a good father and husband in the future and just one meal off a dirty plate didn't kill him or bring on any infections which he could also pick up any time out in the real world. Sometimes you have to find something that relates to the problem and you did. congragulations.
 
Good on you mum. Extreme situations require extreme measures. He can always wash the dish first if he's so grossed out. He's lucky to be fed at all.

Having said that, this is an accumulation over many years and he was probably loved and spoiled when younger and not disciplined adequately previously. It's now come back to haunt his mum.
 
Poor parenting is to blame. If your children haven't learned to brush their teeth, turn light switches off as well as on, be polite to elders, help with chores etc etc by the age of 8 to 10 max, forget it once teenagers you will never win, and your kids will be like this 17 year old. I've seen it time and again. :):cool:
 
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If nothing else got the message across, I can understand. Not sure I would have done it myself, even if I had a dishwasher! My kids took turns with washing/drying dishes, and whoever was drying had the power to send things back for re-washing. Yes, sometimes they sent things back just to be nasty, but then payback happened to them and gradually they learnt to do it properly, and cooperated with each other.
I'll bet that you started teaching them long before their teen years!
 
Good parents are the parents that teach their children that there are consequences to their actions.
Lesson learned here is, if you don’t help your self no one will.
If mum keeps up the way she is going, her son will grow up to be a good father, a responsible husband and an excellent example to he’s children. This is what good parenting is about, well done mum.👏👏👏👍👍
Good parenting starts from birth, teaching starts long before they are terrible teens.
 
This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

View attachment 4139
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
Why has tackling this lazy, spoiled sod's appalling g behaviour been allowed for so long! This shd hv been dealt with years ago. At 17, he shd hv been taught properly.
Parental failure is the culprit.
Lazy parents breed trouble.
If he is incapable of late learning, kick him out.
 
This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

View attachment 4139
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
The problem with a lot of the youth today is lack of punishment. Even animals chastise their young. Personally I would have been given quite a few belts with the jug cord if I acted like him.
I think that this punishment was excellently done and I bet that he will think twice about being a lazy grub next time it is his turn to do the dishes
 
Ok I have 5 boys my youngest is 19 , I don't have a dishwasher it's all done by hand . He is the only one that would do all the dishes if asked. I say ask him what chore would you be willing to do? Eating of a dirty plate is asking for food poisoning, I feel this is actually abuse as it is something that has the potential to make him very sick.

I ask all my kids to do their rooms ( which I go over) and to pick one thing to help around the house. They also do their own washing except my 36 year old who moved back home .

Each and everyone of my kids will wash their own dishes

I have a sign over my sink you use you wash

If a child has been taught respect they will do what you ask of them
The sons answer was it's been sanitised. well mate, you asked for a sanitized plate, now eat. I find that fair and NOT abuse. Smart alec's get what they deserve, a piece of their own Medicine!
 
Great job mum....Just imagine what he is like in public, does he wash his hands after using the loo....would you want him working in a cafe or resturant handling your food or "washing" your dishes.
 
This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

View attachment 4139
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
He could have hand washed the plates he was to eat off. It's not like she was sending him off to fight a war like the 17 year old boys Called Up to fight the Vietnam war. Now, that's inappropriate.
 
This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

View attachment 4139
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!

Somebody once said to me that there was no such thing as a bad child but the world was overpopulated with bad parents. This trite saying has been proven false so many times and this mother is one further attempt and this mother has done something to reunite the family.
Boyo, (or whatever your name is) if it is your turn to do the dishes then get on with it whether you like it or not. It is part of your duty, living in that family. They do things to make your life such that you can be lazy and do little or nothing so it is quite right that you contribute. Get off your fat lazy **** and do something to help yuurself and your family.. Thay have had 17 years helping you. You make me sick!!!
 
I say, “Good on you!” I might be old-school, but the age of responsibility is fast disappearing in a world of disrespect and self-centredness. The advent of selfies is proof of that, the ‘look at me’, and ‘look what I’m doing now’ attitude. Thinking of others is becoming scarce, unfortunately. I say, “Well done Mum.” Hope the youngster wakes up to himself!
 
Depriving privileges is today's half baked answer to every behaviour.

Mum, do not feel guilty. Your job is to teach. You taught. Good job!
 
When my girls were old enough to do their own ironing, they wouldn't do it so I bought them a basket each and after washing their clothes I would put them into the basket. well they then ironed but not until the day they needed them and my younger one would only iron the collar of a shirt if it was to be covered up with a pullover. Any way they are fine now
 
This was the dilemma faced by one Reddit user, who found herself at her wit's end with her 17-year-old son's laziness.

“Our family rotates chores - cooking, dishes, cleaning common areas are all done by each family member on different days. My son hates chores and always tries to half a** it to get out of doing it. It’s been a constant battle. Dishes are the worst. He overpacks the dishwasher so the dish detergent can’t even get on the dishes. It just catches on whatever pan he shoved in front. He also doesn’t rinse the dishes at all, so they come out dirty and caked in food. If we want to eat the day after he does dishes, we end up having to hand wash them. He doesn’t care. Any attempt to talk to him is met with a little smirk and he would say, but the dishwasher sanitised it. He knows exactly what he’s doing.”

View attachment 4139
The punishment a mum inflicted on her 17 year old son has divided the internet

After constantly battling with him over his halfhearted efforts to do the dishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

The next day, after he had yet again failed to do the dishes properly, she made him eat his dinner off of a dirty plate.



"He went pale and started protesting that it was gross," she wrote. "I quickly cut him off and reminded him that the dishwasher sanitised them."

The son eventually relented and found the least disgusting dish to eat off of.

"I felt bad - he looked so sick and grossed out," the mother said. "But I was sick of him wasting time and water and detergent."

Unsurprisingly, the Internet was divided on whether this was an acceptable form of punishment.



"NTA (an acronym for 'Not the A-hole). Actions have consequences, and your son learned he can't half-ass his responsibilities and get no consequence for it," wrote one user.

A second agreed: "He's almost old enough to vote and still acts like a toddler. He can't get away with being a disgusting, lazy slob and expect to be treated with respect when he disregards the shared tasks and responsibilities in the same household."

"Yep, it would be pretty gross to eat from the dishes. I guess it is possible that bacteria would make him ill. Not probable enough to be serious. Actions have consequences. Good and bad," wrote another.



However, not everyone was convinced that this was an effective or appropriate form of discipline.

"Little bit too far making him actually eat off the dish. But just a little bit. Yes your reaction was appropriate in leaving him out of dinner and not giving him dishes but going so far as to make him eat something that may still have had dish soap in it was just a wee bit over," wrote one user.

Another said: "Ummm, I feel like asking him to hand wash the dishes he was to eat off of would have been sufficient. But to make him eat off dirty dishes is unsanitary and as a parent, I feel like you have to be better than that."

"ESH. (an acronym for Everyone Sucks Here) I know everyone's saying NTA, and I do think harsh punishment is justified...but eating off dirty plates and watching your son look sick while eating seems too far. It would've been less of an a-hole move to punish him in a more humane way (grounded for a long time, removal of phone/laptop/videogames, etc)," wrote another.

So what do you think? Is this an acceptable form of discipline, or did the mother go too far? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
He is being asked to put the dishes in the dishwasher, put in detergent and press the “go” button. It isn’t really a hard task.!!!!! If they didn’t have a dishwasher then he might be hand washing every item. I’m with the mum……..
 

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