Grandmother in disbelief as her daughter commits unthinkable act with grandchild's boyfriend

In a tale that reads more like a soap opera than real life, a family has been left in tatters after a shocking revelation that has the community whispering and heads shaking in disbelief.

The story, which emerged from an anonymous plea for advice, has become a cautionary tale about the complexities of family dynamics and the boundaries that should never be crossed.



The heart of this family drama lies with a woman who, seeking solace and guidance, reached out to the online column Slate under the pseudonym 'Just Want a Peaceful Retirement'.

The details she provided were both intimate and distressing: her adult daughter, Mia, had engaged in an affair with her 20-year-old granddaughter’s boyfriend.


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Mia’s daughter was betrayed by her own mum by engaging in an affair with her boyfriend. Credit: Shutterstock


Her granddaughter Evelyn, who was attending a local college, had her world upended when she discovered the affair.

‘Evelyn moved out of her [mum's] home and in with me and has gone no contact with her [mum]. I am extremely disappointed and disturbed by my daughter's conduct,’ the grandmother said.

'But as mad and as disappointed as I am, I do want to continue to have a relationship with her, if only to get a clear answer as to why she did something so awful.'

However, the situation was further complicated by Evelyn's ultimatum to the rest of the family: side with her and cut off Mia, or be seen as an enemy.

This predicament left the grandmother in an unenviable position.

'She's very young, and she was grievously betrayed. But it rankles to have a guest in my home telling me who I can and cannot associate with,’ she said.

'On the other hand, I sort of agree with her. This is the worst thing Mia's ever done. But it's not the first time I've been taken aback by something my daughter has done.’

'If it was just a choice of who I want to spend time with, Evelyn is the clear choice, but I resent her putting me in this position.'



The response to this family crisis was measured and empathetic, which began by telling the grandmother not to ‘hold her breath’ waiting for an answer as to why Mia betrayed her own daughter.

'Of course, you are the only one who can decide whether to cut off your daughter, and your granddaughter shouldn't be demanding that you do so,’ the columnist replied.

'Tell Evelyn that you love her and are happy to have her stay with you, but you aren't prepared to become permanently estranged from your child, and that's your choice to make.'

The columnist also suggested talking with her granddaughter about why she was insistent on making her choose sides.

'You seem to think she's being vindictive, but could there be something else going on here?' the columnist said.

'Expecting people to cut off her [mum] as proof that they can be trusted might seem reactive and unreasonable.’

'But if it's really coming from a place of fear and insecurity regarding who she can trust, maybe you can talk about and try to address those underlying worries with Evelyn, even if you can't and don't want to cede your right to make your own decisions about being in contact with your daughter.'



In a similar story, a bride-to-be has been criticised online for her grandmother’s act, who accidentally made an act that made her furious.

She labelled the incident ‘absolute betrayal’ and banned her from attending her wedding.

What did the grandmother do? Read more about the story here.
Key Takeaways
  • A woman shared her family turmoil after her daughter had an affair with her granddaughter's boyfriend.
  • The granddaughter, Evelyn, moved out and cut contact with her mum after discovering the affair.
  • The grandmother sought advice from Slate's Care and Feeding column as to how to handle the family feud.
  • The advice given was not to expect an answer from the daughter about her actions and that the grandmother has the right to maintain contact with her daughter despite her granddaughter's ultimatum.
What do you think of this story members? Do you agree with the columnist’s advice? Let us know in the comments below!
 
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Nothing new there, heaps of mums been bonking their daughters boyfriends, heard of that 40 years ago.
Yes. How crazy that they would be so desperate. Glad she found out the character of her boyfriend before it became more serious. She has every right to disengage from her mum. I hope she can move out of her nans home and get her own life. Then everyone can make an informed decision on the circumstances and who they prefer to associate with.
 
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I wonder how old the boyfriend was ?
I think her mum did her a favour, better she saw what a scumbag he was before they married .

I know someone who is in her late 50s. Has had so much cosmetic surgery I told her she can't smile anymore. You name it she has done it. I've seen her with really young men.
Some women like them young.

It didn't say if either of them are still together.

The girl however can't expect family members to cut themselves off from her mother.

I think they need to go to counselling
 
It takes TWO to tango! The BOYFRIEND isn't the innocent party he participated too, regardless of the mother's age, the mother is losing everything, the boyfriend gets off scott free...and the grandmother will lose one or the other...I think the boyfriend needs to accept SOME RESPONSIBILITY here...he isn't a child but an ADULT...
 
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The daughter should ditch both the boyfriend and the mother. Both were willing participants in this action.
The mother has lost the respect and love of her daughter. If gran can take her granddaughter in for a while it will give her some love and stability.
 
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I think the grandmother is doing the right thing letting the granddaughter live with her and giving her some family support. I don’t think the granddaughter has the right to tell the grandmother her or me. The mother possibly is vulnerable and may also need some family support. Personally I don’t understand how any mother could allow herself to sleep with her daughter’s boyfriend, it is the ultimate betrayal of trust, regardless of how or why it happened. The boyfriend is also to blame as much as the mother. She is well rid of him.
 
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Step one : Kick the dirt bag boyfriend to the kerb
Step two : Work toward your own independence
Step three : Have a frank and open discussion with mum (just mum and nobody else), and tell her how much she has hurt you, and the family dynamic. If it isn't out in the open, it cannot be fixed.
Step four : Make sure mum is on birth control, or they use protection.
Step five : While they are together, keep a wide berth when they are together. It would be too much to bear.
Step five : Give grandma a break and try to be your own woman to hear yourself roar

In a situation like this, it is difficult to give unbiased advice. Do you say the mother might have things going on, or do you say how could she do this to her daughter? Do you say ... mum I never want to see you again, or ... mum I love you but I hate what you have done to me?
Do you put a protective arm around grandma and try to steer her to Switzerland...to that I say yes you do. Grandma is old enough to know how she feels about things.

Whatever way you look at this ... it sucks.
 
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Well, I knew a guy very well that had the mother AND the daughter....

....AT THE SAME TIME!!!
wasn't you by any chance ??? LOL Didn't think so but does sound like another soap opera that goes on forever. I can't work out why people watch this shit about who's up who and who's paid the rent.
 
wasn't you by any chance ??? LOL Didn't think so but does sound like another soap opera that goes on forever. I can't work out why people watch this shit about who's up who and who's paid the rent.
A mate and I went to a nightclub in the Sydney's Western Suburbs in about 1990 on a Friday night. He saw a young girl walking towards the entrance with an older woman when he said "Do you believe in sex at first sight?" She said yes and asked the older woman (who ended up being her mother) for the car keys. You know what happened next.

At the end of the night, he ended up going home with both the young girl and her mother, and he didn't resurface until late Sunday afternoon after a non stop weekend threesome!

Lucky bugger!
 
A mate and I went to a nightclub in the Sydney's Western Suburbs in about 1990 on a Friday night. He saw a young girl walking towards the entrance with an older woman when he said "Do you believe in sex at first sight?" She said yes and asked the older woman (who ended up being her mother) for the car keys. You know what happened next.

At the end of the night, he ended up going home with both the young girl and her mother, and he didn't resurface until late Sunday afternoon after a non stop weekend threesome!

Lucky bugger!
wonder if he was exhausted.... he should have been. LOL
 
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Reactions: Veggiepatch
Do we really need to partake in this kind of uninteresting topic? These matters are private and to those who publish them, get a brain.
Please we ARE SENIORS so treat us as such.
I realise there are ghouls about who enjoy others' miseries, BUT PLEASE.
 
Do we really need to partake in this kind of uninteresting topic? These matters are private and to those who publish them, get a brain.
Please we ARE SENIORS so treat us as such.
I realise there are ghouls about who enjoy others' miseries, BUT PLEASE.
Aha! So.... you've met my mother-in-law then?
 

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