My mums favourites:
Wouldn’t be dead for quids.
Wouldn’t say shit for shilling.
And from a friend of my parents to my mum - “Bricko, you arrested like a Yellow Cab with both doors open”. Bricko was my mums nickname, and if she was bending over, this comment was made, I might add, with very good humour, and no bad intentions.
 
When dealing with F***WITS. "I've got the memory of an Elephant & the Patience of a Rabbit Trap".
"It's a long ole road that has no turning, & good things come to those who wait, especially for people like me in regards to Dickheads like you."
Hey hey hey, we don’t need this poor language thanks. This phrase should not Jane been published
 
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