Things That Only Grandmothers Know: A Valueless Life?
- Replies 2
Note from the Editor:
This article was kindly written for the SDC by member Josephine G.
When I come to consider what lies behind the woes, difficulties, sickness and drear of the lives of many women of my generation, I come to the conclusion it is because underneath the daily grind that we ‘get on with’, there is a system of beliefs, rock-solid, unspoken, probably not recognised in any formed way, that we learned at our mother’s knee.
It is true for everyone that the unquestioned beliefs in the background of our lives determine how we live, our behaviours and our resistance. Without uncovering and revising our beliefs, we will always end up doing what we have always done. What I and many or most women took on board and were taught overtly or covertly was that our value lay in being a good wife and mother. That was our destiny, the true meaning of our lives. There was no deliberate intent of malice or even restriction, this is how it had always been and always would be.
When I had my first daughter, the hospital chaplain gave me this unforgettable warning. ‘Remember, mother, she will forget everything you say and copy everything you do.’ In the beginning, the mother is the equivalent of a divine model, demonstrating what it means to be a woman, and we internalise that model long before we are able to think. We saw our mothers cooking and cleaning and serving us, but above all, serving and obeying her husband. He was lord and master, the final authority on all things. As observant little girls, we probably learned too how to subvert that authority, useful ways to manage or manipulate while keeping up the fiction of his superiority.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Quisque in diam id erat facilisis consectetur vitae vel urna.
Ut lacus libero, suscipit auctor ipsum sit amet, viverra pretium nisl. Nullam facilisis nec odio nec dapibus. Integer maximus risus et velit porttitor ullamcorper
This article was kindly written for the SDC by member Josephine G.
When I come to consider what lies behind the woes, difficulties, sickness and drear of the lives of many women of my generation, I come to the conclusion it is because underneath the daily grind that we ‘get on with’, there is a system of beliefs, rock-solid, unspoken, probably not recognised in any formed way, that we learned at our mother’s knee.
It is true for everyone that the unquestioned beliefs in the background of our lives determine how we live, our behaviours and our resistance. Without uncovering and revising our beliefs, we will always end up doing what we have always done. What I and many or most women took on board and were taught overtly or covertly was that our value lay in being a good wife and mother. That was our destiny, the true meaning of our lives. There was no deliberate intent of malice or even restriction, this is how it had always been and always would be.
Do you agree or relate? Image Credit: Shutterstock
When I had my first daughter, the hospital chaplain gave me this unforgettable warning. ‘Remember, mother, she will forget everything you say and copy everything you do.’ In the beginning, the mother is the equivalent of a divine model, demonstrating what it means to be a woman, and we internalise that model long before we are able to think. We saw our mothers cooking and cleaning and serving us, but above all, serving and obeying her husband. He was lord and master, the final authority on all things. As observant little girls, we probably learned too how to subvert that authority, useful ways to manage or manipulate while keeping up the fiction of his superiority.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Quisque in diam id erat facilisis consectetur vitae vel urna.
Ut lacus libero, suscipit auctor ipsum sit amet, viverra pretium nisl. Nullam facilisis nec odio nec dapibus. Integer maximus risus et velit porttitor ullamcorper
Get your SDC Rewards membership now!
Become a member today and join over 200,000 Australians already taking advantage of daily news, weather, petrol costs, games, jokes, deals and more.
-
Fewer ADS. We'll remove most of the annoying ads on the website as a token of our appreciation.
-
Priority updates. You'll be our number 1 priority when it comes to app updates
-
Weekly Rewards. SDC Rewards Members get access to exclusive weekly competitions
-
Exclusive content. You’ll receive exclusive updates from the team on a regular basis
-
Early access. That’s right, not only will you get priority access, but you’ll also get early access
-
Cancel at any time
-
All SDC Rewards membership benefits
Or
Already a member? Sign in to access the content
Sponsored
.png){kind=icon}
