When I was young my mother would put out a pillow case full of things. Now I'm 73
I enjoy seeing all my children and grand children on Christmas day
I remember those days ,our parents would put a Xmas gift and Xmas fruit in pillow case and hang on the end of the bed. My grandfather would arrive for Xmas dinner and have a big bag of boiled peanuts (yum) , they were the the best xmases before all the commercialisation took over .
 
I have so many great Christmas memories from when I was a child to Christmas with my husband and 13 children but I'm going to share a memory that has stayed with me for 32 years and one I will regret forever .

My grandmother was like my mother, she raised me from birth due to my mother being only 14.

Christmas was one of my grandmother's favourite time of the year , and as far back as I can remember she made it special for all of us.

Fast forward to Christmas 1990 and for some stupid reason I started studying the bible with Jehovah Witnesses and for me I stopped celebrating Xmas. When I told Nan she was devastated, angry, disappointed, you name it.
That was the worst time of my life when I realised what I had done. At this time I had six kids.

I was determined to celebrate Xmas with her the following year after I realised what I did to her.

Christmas 1991 I was going to make it up to her.

March 1991 her sister passed away and it was a sad time for her.
Then at the end of November she was worried about her sisters belongings, her expensive jewellery ect as my grandmother was her only living sibling and she had no children.

Sunday the 1st of December my grandmother asked me to spend the day with her , my aunt and my sister. I couldn't as hubby's aunt and uncle had arrived from Greece and we were having them over.

The next day my grandmother had to go see her sisters solicitor near Central station Sydney, I told her I would go but as I was 28 weeks pregnant and suffered high blood pressure she wouldn't let me.

At 4pm no one could contact her , she should have been home. I called my uncle who lived the next suburb away in Riverwood , and asked him to go and see if she was home.

30 minutes later my uncle called back and asked me to sit down. The police had just been to his place to inform him that my grandmother had a heart attack on platform 25 on central station waiting for a train to Riverwood .

It was the 2nd of December that I lost my grandmother , my best friend , my mentor and I loss her without making it up to her for what I did the year before.

Even though it was so very hard to celebrate Christmas 🎄 we did for her because it would have been what she wanted .
To this day I remember what I didn't do.
I also tell people make sure what you do or don't do you don't regret it.
You can't get back time
That brought tears to my eyes
 
At Christmas my dad would tie forks and spoons on strings to the handle on our bedroom door so that if we tried to get up early and rush to open our presents he would hear and order us back to bed till a suitable time when he and mum would let us out so that they didn’t miss out on seeing our faces when we saw our presents. Their Christmas joy was seeing our faces. I understand that now but it was agonising for little kids being made to wait for their Christmas joy.
 
At Christmas my dad would tie forks and spoons on strings to the handle on our bedroom door so that if we tried to get up early and rush to open our presents he would hear and order us back to bed till a suitable time when he and mum would let us out so that they didn’t miss out on seeing our faces when we saw our presents. Their Christmas joy was seeing our faces. I understand that now but it was agonising for little kids being made to wait for their Christmas joy.
😹that’s funny
 
I remember the day before being at Greens Milkbar and having an ear ache, then the next morning, my grandmother looking at me and saying loud Omg let me see your neck . Then I wasn't allowed to walk around, she had told me if I did I wouldn't be able to have babies, well I proved her wrong 😊
Your grandmother sounds like she was a wonderful woman and she did a fabulous job raising you. Remember the loving life she gave you. Your story warms my heart ❤️
 
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A memory that has always stayed with me was each Christmas Eve I would go to bed with my sock at the end of the bed, we didn't have any decorations up or presents under the tree, it was like a normal bed time except you put the sock at the end of the bed hoping Santa will leave a small gift, an orange and mixed nuts and if you were lucky a chocolate coin. In the morning I was excited cos Santa had been I would run out to the lounge to tell mum that Santa had been and I always walked into the room with a real tree up and decorated, the ceilings decorated, table set for our Christmas lunch and presents under the tree. I am 63 now but it is still a very vivid memory that I will always cherish.
 
I rember receiving a phone call on Christmoeni g when I was travelling around Scotla d and staying with my aunt. It was my dad asking me to open the door ... it was my mum and dad who flew out from Melbourne to wish me Merry Christmas and give me the best Christmas present ever .... them. I had them fir 2 hours before they flew home again to be with my brothers ❤️❤️❤️
 
I rember receiving a phone call on Christmoeni g when I was travelling around Scotla d and staying with my aunt. It was my dad asking me to open the door ... it was my mum and dad who flew out from Melbourne to wish me Merry Christmas and give me the best Christmas present ever .... them. I had them fir 2 hours before they flew home again to be with my brothers ❤️❤️❤️
That’s really sweet😍
 
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On the family farm, hot blazing sun beating down
Christmas was the best time in our dusty town
Kids, bare feet in the red dirt
Dad, in his best shirt

Reindeer replaced by emus in flight
Racing across the paddock, a comical sight
Sitting under gum trees strewn with sparkling tinsel
Was mum’s Christmas punch, a drink truly sinful

Neighbours, friends and family all coming together
This was my most cherished treasure
 
On the family farm, hot blazing sun beating down
Christmas was the best time in our dusty town
Kids, bare feet in the red dirt
Dad, in his best shirt

Reindeer replaced by emus in flight
Racing across the paddock, a comical sight
Sitting under gum trees strewn with sparkling tinsel
Was mum’s Christmas punch, a drink truly sinful

Neighbours, friends and family all coming together
This was my most cherished treasure
That’s awesome🌹
 
My sisters and me woke up xmas morning. We new there be nothing. But mum surprised us threw the night she cut a bit off the pine tree put it in a pot of dirt. Made some paper rings to hang on it. Our faces lit up. And pine cones with sparkle on them. Later on was a knock on the door the salvation army had a box of food and presents. My sisters got games. And I got a doll. It was great. In the box we got xmas cake and custard. That was a treat.
 
I remember as a child waking up Christmas morning and as well as a present there was a pillowcase filled with small treats like fruit and little tins of sweets and biscuits was such a treat and made the day special wasn’t always a big Christmas but was always special
 
My sisters and me woke up xmas morning. We new there be nothing. But mum surprised us threw the night she cut a bit off the pine tree put it in a pot of dirt. Made some paper rings to hang on it. Our faces lit up. And pine cones with sparkle on them. Later on was a knock on the door the salvation army had a box of food and presents. My sisters got games. And I got a doll. It was great. In the box we got xmas cake and custard. That was a treat.
Awwww😍that’s awesome gotta love your mum🌹
 
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I remember as a child waking up Christmas morning and as well as a present there was a pillowcase filled with small treats like fruit and little tins of sweets and biscuits was such a treat and made the day special wasn’t always a big Christmas but was always special
🎁have a lovely christmas🌹
 
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When I was about 8 years old I awoke in the early hours of Christmas morning and I was sure I saw Santa’s shadow on the wall just outside our bedroom. I was so excited to tell the rest of the family when we all got up in the morning. Of course Mum & Dad went along with my story even if my sisters were a bit dubious! To this day that memory has stayed with me & there’s a little place in my mind that still believes it’s true! 🎅😉
 
I hated Christmas as a kid. My uncle would drive to a farm and buy 2 live chickens, off their heads in our backyard and Mum would then pluck and disembowel them. I would stay in my room crying. In protest one year at the age of six, I climbed onto our wood pile, and sulked while everyone ate Christmas lunch inside. Mum was mortified and I copped a smacking when the rellies had left. Apparently I was an embarassment that day. One kind Aunt came out to the wood heap and offered to bring me a snack. I requested a pickled onion and a glass of water. I still don't eat chicken but love a spicy pickled onion.
 
When I was about 8 years old I awoke in the early hours of Christmas morning and I was sure I saw Santa’s shadow on the wall just outside our bedroom. I was so excited to tell the rest of the family when we all got up in the morning. Of course Mum & Dad went along with my story even if my sisters were a bit dubious! To this day that memory has stayed with me & there’s a little place in my mind that still believes it’s true! 🎅😉
🎅we have to believe in something have a nice Christmas 🎁
 
Dear Suzanne Rose, your Grandmother has forgiven you, and she probably never felt the need to be upset with you. If you think back to that day, she wouldn't let you go because you were very pregnant.
Do you honestly feel you need to grieve
forever, for something you had no control
over. Realistically the loss you felt when you knew she was gone .She was someone you loved,and were so grateful to have her there when you were growing
up. You treasured her, and loved her
unconditionally. As she loved you, and she protected you .
Don't you see that she would never have put on you this terrible guilty feeling you have put on yourself.
She would want you to forgive yourself, and realise that you can hold the love you shared with her, that never dies it is eternal.
Appreciate her the way you do, and let go of the Negative that you have let her passing change the gift she gave you, of her unconditional love for you.
She is in a better place, and she would
want you to bathe yourself in all the special things she brought to you to remember her.
But you are the only one who can release
Yourself from the "guilt" you feel. You knew her very well, would she want you to continue with the guilty feelings you
keep putting on yourself ?
The short answer is NO.
Turn the Negative into a Positive and
encourage all of your family to know the
the person that gave you everything to be the Person you are today.
I sincerely hope that the message I sent to you, has allowed you to free yourself from a lifetime of regret, that you have taken onto yourself with no certainty, in truth of ever moving into what she had always wanted for you.
 
On the family farm, hot blazing sun beating down
Christmas was the best time in our dusty town
Kids, bare feet in the red dirt
Dad, in his best shirt

Reindeer replaced by emus in flight
Racing across the paddock, a comical sight
Sitting under gum trees strewn with sparkling tinsel
Was mum’s Christmas punch, a drink truly sinful

Neighbours, friends and family all coming together
This was my most cherished treasure
Not a fan of poetry but was GOOD!!
 

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