Skipton

Well-known member
Feb 2, 2022
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How to Wash a Toilet
  1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
  2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
  3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.
  4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
  5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.
  6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
  7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.
  8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
  9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
 
How to Wash a Toilet
  1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
  2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
  3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.
  4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
  5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.
  6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
  7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.
  8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
  9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
Yep, there is zero conflict of interest in this sponsored message 🐶🤪😂
 
How to Wash a Toilet
  1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
  2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
  3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.
  4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
  5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.
  6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
  7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.
  8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
  9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
All the bathrooms I've been in did not have a toilet nor a commode chair 1680386546954.png
 
THIS IS TRUE.... I DID IT..and I have never printed it to anyone before.
On a cold winter morning, in Canberra, I slept in. I was the bus driver who was taking the Cat Club Members to Sydney for a huge Cat show.. I had taken the bus home so I could get an early 5am start. I got a phone call asking where was the bus ... NO MOBILE PHONE then Late 1970s ... I told them the radiator was frozen and I was pouring boiling water in and over it. to start the bus and that I would get there in time to get them all to the show on time for the Vet Inspections .
Man You could have cut the air on the bus with a carving knife . By the time, we got to Goulburn and then Marulan for Brekky, nobody would talk to me. Well, I got fired up to break the ice. So all back on the bus with their Aristocrat Cats and PHiPhi wants the Pee Pee pan .. I picked up the microphone and said .. I know you all love and know lots about cats. BUT "Can anyone tell me how to get a cat to bark like a dog?" No-one knew.. so I told them... "You dip the cat in BP fuel and light a match and the cat goes "WOOF" ... Not one person laughed so I said ...I have had it ..If I told you the same thing about a dog YOU WOULD ALL SPLIT YOUR SIDES LAUGHING... well the atmosphere changed within a moment .. I think they were more shocked that I would say that .. and they started laughing one by one .. and we got to the vet inspection on time and had a great cat show as they won so many ribbons to take home.. the trip home was just great. That is exactly what happened.
 
How to Wash a Toilet
  1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
  2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
  3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.
  4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
  5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.
  6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
  7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.
  8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
  9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
Typical of a dog to think this will work🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
 
Sorry but I have to inform you that this sick attempt at humour re how to wash a toilet using a cat is really bad taste and should have been censored before you published it to your readers. Please do better next time.
 
  • Haha
Reactions: NotNats
that's because of SDC's literary preference for "americanese".
You would have thought that professional journalistic protocol would have required the text to be edited to conform to the Australian mode of speech.
 
  • Haha
Reactions: NotNats
How to Wash a Toilet
  1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
  2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
  3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.
  4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
  5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.
  6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
  7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.
  8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
  9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
I'll bet every time you clean a toilet from now on you will have a bit of a chuckle. Rather good I thought
 
I'll bet every time you clean a toilet from now on you will have a bit of a chuckle. Rather good I thought
Actually I thought that it was a very sick joke and the group organisers agreed and said they would be more careful with what they publish in future.
 
THIS IS TRUE.... I DID IT..and I have never printed it to anyone before.
On a cold winter morning, in Canberra, I slept in. I was the bus driver who was taking the Cat Club Members to Sydney for a huge Cat show.. I had taken the bus home so I could get an early 5am start. I got a phone call asking where was the bus ... NO MOBILE PHONE then Late 1970s ... I told them the radiator was frozen and I was pouring boiling water in and over it. to start the bus and that I would get there in time to get them all to the show on time for the Vet Inspections .
Man You could have cut the air on the bus with a carving knife . By the time, we got to Goulburn and then Marulan for Brekky, nobody would talk to me. Well, I got fired up to break the ice. So all back on the bus with their Aristocrat Cats and PHiPhi wants the Pee Pee pan .. I picked up the microphone and said .. I know you all love and know lots about cats. BUT "Can anyone tell me how to get a cat to bark like a dog?" No-one knew.. so I told them... "You dip the cat in BP fuel and light a match and the cat goes "WOOF" ... Not one person laughed so I said ...I have had it ..If I told you the same thing about a dog YOU WOULD ALL SPLIT YOUR SIDES LAUGHING... well the atmosphere changed within a moment .. I think they were more shocked that I would say that .. and they started laughing one by one .. and we got to the vet inspection on time and had a great cat show as they won so many ribbons to take home.. the trip home was just great. That is exactly what happened.
 
Actually I thought that it was a very sick joke and the group organisers agreed and said they would be more careful with what they publish in future.
 
Actually I thought that it was a very sick joke and the group organisers agreed and said they would be more careful with what they publish in future.
 

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