Find out what this Sexologist says about the myths surrounding sex and ageing

Disclaimer: This article is intended as an informative piece only, and does not replace medical advice from a health professional. Seek advice from your doctor if you have specific questions about your body and overall health.

We here at the SDC think it’s important to fight back against myths and common misconceptions. One of the most common myths we hear is that once you reach a certain age, you just don't feel like having sex anymore.

But one Sexologist said that perpetuating this false belief can do more harm than good.



In a new research commissioned by adult toy and lingerie store Wild Secrets, it was revealed that one in three people over the age of 65 are comfortable using sex toys, half agree that using toys maximises pleasure, and – overwhelmingly – older adults are ‘sick’ of people believing the myth that sex is not as enjoyable as you age.

Melbourne-based Sexologist Kassandra Mourikis, from Pleasure Centred Sexology, shared that sex is an important aspect of life as you age, and continuing to believe in the myth that older adults don’t want or enjoy sex is harmful.


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According to Kassandra, not having sex can be ‘harmful’. Credit: Alex Green in Pexels

In an interview, Kassandra claims that the myth surrounding sex and ageing can have ‘real-life medical consequences’.

‘It can result in a bias. The stigma may mean that older Australians don’t bring up sex with their doctor, or alternatively, that a doctor might not think to bring it up with them in an appointment,’ she explained.

According to the Sexologist, this can lead to health complications such as sexually transmitted infections (or STIs) being ignored or overlooked. Mental health challenges that come with being deprived of sex can lead to feelings of identity loss, especially if sex was a large part of their life.



Aside from enjoying intimacy and pleasure ‘just because’, Kassandra argued that sex has numerous health benefits that remain unchanged as someone moves through different stages of life. She explained that masturbation, partnered sex and orgasm can relieve stress and pain.

She added that with age comes wisdom – especially when it comes to sex. Older lovers might be better at expressing what they want and need and have a greater understanding of the importance of respecting boundaries. This all translates to deeper connection and intimacy levels.


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Older adults shouldn’t be embarrassed about their needs in the bedroom. Credit: Татьяна Танатова in Pexels

However, the Sexologist also warned that there are still risks associated with sex and ageing.

Kassandra said that there’s still a ‘widely-held belief’ that older people can’t contract STIs, which is not true.

‘No matter your age, if you’re having unprotected sex, you are at risk of contracting an STI,’ she claimed.

If there’s something abnormal going on with your body, it would be best to have it checked by your GP.

Another risk that older women might face is the fact that, after menopause, they experience vaginal atrophy. This is the thinning, drying and inflammation of the vaginal walls due to decreased estrogen levels in the body.

This means there’s less natural lubrication, which makes certain activities (like penetrative sex) less enjoyable.



For older men, erectile dysfunction is also common – and natural. But if it’s becoming a problem, a trip to the doctor can help you.

Lastly, the Sexologist advised everyone to ‘stick to positions that align with your abilities’ to avoid getting injured.

The most important point is that the desire for sex does not go away with age, despite what stereotypes and misconceptions have led you to believe.
Key Takeaways

  • Contrary to popular belief, older adults do indeed like to have sex and can find it just as pleasurable as young adults.
  • Sex is an important aspect of life as you age and should not be shrouded in shame.
  • There are health benefits to having sex, including pain relief and improved mental health.
  • However, there are also risks associated with sex and ageing, such as the risk of physical injury.
  • It is important to have regular check-ups with your GP and to use protection if you are sexually active to avoid STIs.
What did you think about Kassandra’s advice, members? Let us know in the comments below! Also, please remember to have regular check-ups with your GP to make sure you’re staying healthy!
 
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