[Jonathan Leane]

'Feeling Rejected': Grandparents Left Out of Intimate Wedding Celebration​

A grandmother on a popular social media forum, Gransnet, recently shared her disappointment after receiving a text from her granddaughter announcing her upcoming wedding, to which only siblings, parents, and children were invited. The grandmother's husband, who is the father of the bride's now deceased father, feels particularly hurt and rejected by the decision.

The topic sparked a lively discussion among users, with opinions divided on whether or not the grandparents should feel hurt and rejected by the decision or not. Some argue that it is ultimately the couple's wedding and they have the right to decide who they want to invite.

One commenter wrote, 'It is their wedding. They have decided on a small, intimate celebration and you need to respect and understand that. It certainly isn't something to start falling out about.'

Another said, 'I can understand his hurt. I am sure that DGD (Dear Grand-daughter) has no idea how much this might hurt, so it is unlikely to be deliberate, unless there is difficult history.'

However, others argue that the grandparents have every right to feel hurt and rejected, especially if they have had a close relationship with the bride. One commenter wrote simply, 'If you've been close I can see why you would be hurt.'

Another commenter added, 'People use the "It’s their wedding" [excuse] for lots of scenarios now. Especially child free weddings. We are all free to express an opinion & if I were in this situation I would feel beyond hurt.'

The discussion also touched on the possibility that the couple may have had to make difficult decisions regarding which grandparents to invite, or that they may have been trying to keep their wedding small and affordable.

One commenter pointed out, 'It's not clear how well you know them - it just may be that 'inviting grandparents' triggers invites for other family members that they can't cope with. It would be nice to think you could stand there instead of your son, but that is obviously not how they see it.'

Ultimately, the decision to exclude certain family members from a wedding can be a difficult and emotional one, and it's important to remember that there may be reasons behind the decision that are not immediately obvious.

The situation has undoubtedly divided opinion and sparked a vibrant debate, with many expressing their sympathies with the user's husband and others emphasising that the couple should be respected for their decision. It's an issue that has no easy answer. What would you do in this situation?

 

[Sharon55]

At my wedding in 1981, my maternal grandmother was on the top of my list having been the only grandparent left. My maternal grandfather died 2 months before and he certainly would have been there too.

 

[Suzanne rose]

I have no fear of being not asked to my granddaughter's wedding as she won't ever want to get married according to her. She doesn't want kids either. It seems with so many broken marriages in the family she has learned a good lesson from that!

She maybe the one to break that cycle

 

[Groovy]

There are always two sides of the story and situations, that people are not aware of. So opinions and judgments shouldn’t be made.

 

[LeslieD]

'Feeling Rejected': Grandparents Left Out of Intimate Wedding Celebration​

A grandmother on a popular social media forum, Gransnet, recently shared her disappointment after receiving a text from her granddaughter announcing her upcoming wedding, to which only siblings, parents, and children were invited. The grandmother's husband, who is the father of the bride's now deceased father, feels particularly hurt and rejected by the decision.

The topic sparked a lively discussion among users, with opinions divided on whether or not the grandparents should feel hurt and rejected by the decision or not. Some argue that it is ultimately the couple's wedding and they have the right to decide who they want to invite.

One commenter wrote, 'It is their wedding. They have decided on a small, intimate celebration and you need to respect and understand that. It certainly isn't something to start falling out about.'

Another said, 'I can understand his hurt. I am sure that DGD (Dear Grand-daughter) has no idea how much this might hurt, so it is unlikely to be deliberate, unless there is difficult history.'

However, others argue that the grandparents have every right to feel hurt and rejected, especially if they have had a close relationship with the bride. One commenter wrote simply, 'If you've been close I can see why you would be hurt.'

Another commenter added, 'People use the "It’s their wedding" [excuse] for lots of scenarios now. Especially child free weddings. We are all free to express an opinion & if I were in this situation I would feel beyond hurt.'

The discussion also touched on the possibility that the couple may have had to make difficult decisions regarding which grandparents to invite, or that they may have been trying to keep their wedding small and affordable.

One commenter pointed out, 'It's not clear how well you know them - it just may be that 'inviting grandparents' triggers invites for other family members that they can't cope with. It would be nice to think you could stand there instead of your son, but that is obviously not how they see it.'

Ultimately, the decision to exclude certain family members from a wedding can be a difficult and emotional one, and it's important to remember that there may be reasons behind the decision that are not immediately obvious.

The situation has undoubtedly divided opinion and sparked a vibrant debate, with many expressing their sympathies with the user's husband and others emphasising that the couple should be respected for their decision. It's an issue that has no easy answer. What would you do in this situation?

I find that she told her grandparents via a text message makes this even worse. What is wrong with visiting or a phone call to explain why. I would be absolutely devastated if I wasn’t invited to any of my grandkids weddings.

 

[margaretritchie48]

My grand daughter got married last year. I think that there should be invites to parents, grandparents and siblings and their partners. The next line of invites are friends of the couple. Then depending on the budget who the couple feel they would like to invite.
These days you usually find that parents and grandparents contribute to the wedding.

 

[DiRose]

I'd be far more inclined to leave the kids out rather than the Grandies. Kids don't care about weddings, and are generally a nuisance. Grandies usually ;-) know how to behave.

 

[Jennie]

I was never lucky enough to have grandparents on either side. So for me, the situation never arose!

We only had my hubby's grandmother alive to go to our wedding. My grandparents all died 1950's to 1960's, didn't have them growing up.

 

[RACHA]

People will get their nose out about small things that really don't matter. It's not a big deal. Grandma etc should man up, grow a set and move on.

People have emotions. Love, hate hurt, anger, disappointment and more. All feel. Its called being human. Unless you're heartless.

 

[Strawb]

'Feeling Rejected': Grandparents Left Out of Intimate Wedding Celebration​

A grandmother on a popular social media forum, Gransnet, recently shared her disappointment after receiving a text from her granddaughter announcing her upcoming wedding, to which only siblings, parents, and children were invited. The grandmother's husband, who is the father of the bride's now deceased father, feels particularly hurt and rejected by the decision.

The topic sparked a lively discussion among users, with opinions divided on whether or not the grandparents should feel hurt and rejected by the decision or not. Some argue that it is ultimately the couple's wedding and they have the right to decide who they want to invite.

One commenter wrote, 'It is their wedding. They have decided on a small, intimate celebration and you need to respect and understand that. It certainly isn't something to start falling out about.'

Another said, 'I can understand his hurt. I am sure that DGD (Dear Grand-daughter) has no idea how much this might hurt, so it is unlikely to be deliberate, unless there is difficult history.'

However, others argue that the grandparents have every right to feel hurt and rejected, especially if they have had a close relationship with the bride. One commenter wrote simply, 'If you've been close I can see why you would be hurt.'

Another commenter added, 'People use the "It’s their wedding" [excuse] for lots of scenarios now. Especially child free weddings. We are all free to express an opinion & if I were in this situation I would feel beyond hurt.'

The discussion also touched on the possibility that the couple may have had to make difficult decisions regarding which grandparents to invite, or that they may have been trying to keep their wedding small and affordable.

One commenter pointed out, 'It's not clear how well you know them - it just may be that 'inviting grandparents' triggers invites for other family members that they can't cope with. It would be nice to think you could stand there instead of your son, but that is obviously not how they see it.'

Ultimately, the decision to exclude certain family members from a wedding can be a difficult and emotional one, and it's important to remember that there may be reasons behind the decision that are not immediately obvious.

The situation has undoubtedly divided opinion and sparked a vibrant debate, with many expressing their sympathies with the user's husband and others emphasising that the couple should be respected for their decision. It's an issue that has no easy answer. What would you do in this situation?

I can fully understand the Granddaughter's decision on who to invite. My wife and I eloped with only 8 friends invited. Even her two teenage girls did not know.
And we don't regret it.

 

[Thecla]

Do what we did in a similar situation, just turn up.

 

[SGH]

My mother black balled my second wedding, the only family I had there were my children and my black sheep cousin. My Godmother has since informed me of what went on and you know what if my Grandfather had been alive at the time he would have told my mother exactly what he thought of her behaviour.
My friends who hard stuck by me through thick and thin were there as they always had been, looking out for my best interests. So as Macarj says, sometimes friends are more important then family.

 

[Nana Zorak]

As neither of my grandkids is ever likely to get married this is not a problem for me. My wonderful granddaughter has moved in with her boyfriend & never wants to have kids & the second granddaughter is in the transition to being a boy & likewise is unlikely to find anyone to marry. So this problem is unlikely to occur in my family. I can understand how upsetting this would be if the family was really close.

 

[Nana Zorak]

My wonder granddaughter is here this weekend as she was set upon by one of her patients who has dementia & tried to strangle her because the home has not enough staff to send backup when dealing with difficult patients. This came only a week after she burnt out & had to have 3 days of personal time off. She of course took her complaint to Work Safety to deal with & she had to quit her job because of the danger that is all around in those situations. The concept is very different to the reality of the village as they are too keen on profit over the safety of the staff. It costs half a million to get into the village with substandard food & care. So now Artie is after a new job.

 

[Nana Zorak]

Just because your granddaughter is having a sex change doesn’t mean she won’t find anyone to marry. That’s a very strange thing to say. Lots of people in her situation find true happiness in life. You need to research her situation then you’ll understand better she can also adopt anyway. There are Plenty of children that need forever love. Change your attitude granny.

Never! I don't agree with mutilating young minds & bodys.