Jokes & fun

If it's a joke, riddle, or a funny picture - it belongs in this forum!
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Luckyus
Joke Walking Down the Aisle
Walking Down the Aisle I'll never forget how happy I was when I saw my missus walking down the aisle towards me. My heart was beating fast and the excitement was unbearable. It seemed to take an age, but eventually, there she was, standing beside me. I gave her a loving smile and said, "Get that trolley over here love. They're doing 3 cartons...
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650
Luckyus
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650
Luckyus
Joke Evils of Drink Lecture
Evils of Drink Lecture An elderly man is stopped by the police around 1am, and is asked where he is going at that time of night. The man replied, "I am going to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body and the family environment." The officer then asked, "Oh really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of...
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357
Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke Subject: Best Tweet Of The Week
Subject: Best Tweet Of The Week Winner of the Chicago Tribune's best Tweet of the week: "I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant but apparently, it just changes the color of the baby."
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391
Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke Bus Thieves
Bus Thieves Irish Bus Thieves: Two Irish friends leave the pub. One says to other, 'I can't be bothered to walk all the way home.' 'I know, me too but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last bus home.' 'We could steal a bus from the depot.' replies his mate. They arrive at the bus depot and one goes in to get a bus while the...
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465
Luckyus
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465
Luckyus
Joke Shame
Shame
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462
Luckyus
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462
Luckyus
Joke Winter
Winter
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344
Luckyus
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344
Luckyus
Joke Gene Pool
Gene Pool
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306
Luckyus
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306
Luckyus
  • Question
Wasted Time
Wasted Time
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311
Luckyus
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311
Luckyus
Joke Facebook Page
Facebook Page
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313
Luckyus
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313
Luckyus
Joke the Note
the Note The wife left a note on the fridge: "It's not working! I can't take it any more. I've gone to stay at my Mother's!" I opened the fridge, the light came on, and the beer was still cold. What the hell is she talking about?
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386
Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke A New Classic!! (Non-PC and probably get charged with giving state secrets)
A New Classic!! (Non-PC and probably get charged with giving state secrets) A New Classic!! (Non-PC and probably get charged with giving away state secrets) The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Little Hodakio, a...
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Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke Short Stories
Short Stories These books hold the world record for the shortest stories, and you must have a pretty good long term memory and be well informed to fully appreciate the humor. Just remember some of these are very, very short books. _________ World's Shortest Books MY BLACK GIRLFRIENDS By Tiger Woods _________________________________________...
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631
Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke The Birds
The Birds
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438
Luckyus
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438
Luckyus
Joke Ultimate Bra
Ultimate Bra
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Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke The Cricketer
The Cricketer An Australian lady walked into a Police Station and the desk Sergeant said "Can I help you?" "Yes" she said, "I'd like to report a case of sexual assault". "Where did it happen?" the Sergeant asked. "In the park just down the road" she replied. "Can you describe what happened?” "Yes, I was walking along the footpath in the...
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Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke The Second Coming
The Second Coming A young Catholic girl went to confession and said to the priest, "I'm pregnant." He asked, "How did this happen, my child?" She said, "I think it must have been the second coming." The priest, shocked by this reply asked, "What makes you think this has anything to do with the Second Coming?" She replied, "Because I...
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Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke The Promise
The Promise Paddy Murphy and Mick were leaning on the bar. Paddy says, "That brother of mine's a ****in liar." "How's dat Murph?" says Mick. "He reckons he never had sex with anyone until he was twenty! How about you Mick?" "Aw ****it Paddy, I can't answer that, I promised him I'd never tell a living soul!"
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Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke My Wife Realised I Was Extracting the Urine!
My Wife Realised I Was Extracting the Urine!
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Wandiwa
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Luckyus
The Old Mariner (Very NON-PC Bound to Upset Some)
The Old Mariner (Very NON-PC Bound to Upset Some) There was an old sea captain was desperate to get married. Not any wife... he wanted a virgin. Could never find one ... every. Finally he went up to the local orphanage and spoke to the Mother Superior. Told his plight and was willing to pay and give a hefty donation to the...
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971
Luckyus
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971
Luckyus
Joke The Motorbike (Contains Profanity Be Warned)
The Motorbike (Contains Profanity Be Warned)
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950
Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke Do You Speak English! (Definitely Non-PC On Your Head Be It)
Do You Speak English! (Definitely Non-PC On Your Head Be It)
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332
Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke While Strolling Around the Marina
While Strolling Around the Marina While strolling around the Marina this morning about 7 am., I noticed a character shouting "Allahu Akbar" and "Death to all infidels" then suddenly he tripped and fell into the water. He was struggling to stay afloat because of all the explosives he was carrying. If he didn't get help he would surely drown...
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Luckyus
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Luckyus
Joke Bill Gates!!
Bill Gates!! Bill Gates and the president of General Motors have met for lunch, and Bill is going on and on about computer technology. "If automotive technology had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades, you would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it would have a top speed of 10,000 miles per hour," says Gates...
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Luckyus
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Vella Gonzaga
Riddle Riddle Masters 29.07.2022
Riddle Masters 29.07.2022 Good morning Riddle Masters! Happy Friday! 😊 I’ve got your third and final riddle for the week. A big thank you to member Dennis R. For sending this one! Pronounced as 1 letter and written with 3. 2 letters there are, and only 2 in me. I am double, I am single, black, grey or blue. I am read from ends, and the same...
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Gil
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mOiOz
MEETING THE PARENTS
MEETING THE PARENTS MEETING THE PARENTS Dan is meeting Maya’s parents for the first time. Invited to dinner, he is sitting at the table and hears his stomach start rumbling, a reminder of the bean soup, cabbage rolls and egg salad that his mother had served him for lunch that day. Dan realises the build-up of gas is now becoming a problem...
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mOiOz
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