You won't believe what this cafe customer did—has entitlement gone too far?
- Replies 13
Cafés: the unofficial living rooms of Australia. Whether you’re after a flat white, a cheeky slice of cake, or just a place to people-watch, there’s no denying that our local coffee shops are a melting pot of personalities and purposes. But what happens when those purposes clash? Well, one recent café kerfuffle in Melbourne has sparked a heated debate online—and it’s got everyone asking: who’s really being entitled here?
Let’s set the scene. A Melbourne woman, seeking a peaceful spot to study with friends, settled into her favourite café. Books open, pens poised, the group was ready for a productive session. But just as they were getting into the groove, a group of mums with young children swooped in and took the seats right next to them—despite there being plenty of other tables available. The mums, as mums with little ones tend to be, were a bit on the noisy side.
Feeling a bit put out, the student took to Reddit to ask: 'Are we overreacting or is this extremely entitled?' She explained, '15 other seating options and this loud group of women with their loud kids sat right behind a few of us studying/reading. We are lightly debating this within our study group.'
She argued that, out of courtesy, the group could have chosen seats further away from those clearly seeking a quiet space. 'Personally, if I’m going to make noise or talk, I opt to sit where others are doing the same—or at least not sit near others that are clearly seeking a quiet space. To me, that’s considerate,' she wrote.
But as it turns out, the internet wasn’t exactly on her side.
The Great Café Debate: Who’s Right?
Some commenters did sympathise, agreeing that it’s a bit rude to plonk yourself (and your noisy brood) right next to someone who’s clearly studying, especially when there are other tables free. 'Let’s not deny the loud and rude exist. I’ve been in quite a few restaurants seated beside tables of neanderthals yelling at the top of their voices. Only solution is to move to a table far away or leave,' one person lamented.
Another added, 'I think it’s rude if there were a bunch of other tables available and they sat down right next to you reading and started being really loud.'
But the majority of responses were less sympathetic—and, in fact, turned the tables on the original poster. 'Yeah, it’s a café, not a library. Can’t expect people to be quiet,' one person pointed out. Another was even more blunt: 'Very entitled of you, yes. You’re studying in a public place, there will be noise. Grow up.'
Others chimed in with similar sentiments: 'It’s a café, so you’re going to have to put up with other people while you’re there. It’s a stretch to think that other people are going to deliberately go out of their way to make sure you have a nice barrier of quiet space.'
Some even suggested that if peace and quiet were so important, the student should have chosen a library or a park instead. 'You chose to study at a place designed for social gathering, that’s on you,' one commenter said. Another added, 'Go study and read at the library.'
Cafés: Social Hubs or Study Sanctuaries?
This little drama raises a bigger question: what are cafés actually for? Are they social spaces where chatter and laughter are part of the charm, or have they become the new libraries, where silence is golden and laptops rule the roost?
The truth is, cafés have always been a bit of both. They’re places to catch up with friends, hold informal meetings, or simply enjoy a moment of solitude with a good book. But as more people work and study remotely, the lines have blurred. It’s not uncommon to see laptops, textbooks, and even the odd Zoom call happening over a long black.
But with that flexibility comes a need for compromise. If you’re after absolute silence, a café might not be your best bet—especially during the busy morning rush or after-school hours. On the other hand, if you’re part of a noisy group, a little awareness of your surroundings can go a long way.
Aussie Café Etiquette: Is There a Middle Ground?
So, what’s the solution? Is there a secret code of café conduct we should all be following?
Here are a few tips for harmonious café coexistence:
Pick your time wisely: If you need quiet, try visiting during off-peak hours.
Scope out the space: If you’re in a group (especially with kids), maybe give solo diners or studiers a bit of space.
Bring headphones: If you’re studying or working, a good pair of noise-cancelling headphones can be a lifesaver.
Be flexible: If things get too noisy, don’t be afraid to move to another table—or another venue.
Remember, it’s a shared space: A little consideration goes a long way, no matter which side of the debate you’re on.
What Do You Think, SDC Members?
We know our community is full of seasoned café-goers, and we’d love to hear your take! Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Do you think cafés should be quiet sanctuaries, or is a bit of noise all part of the experience? And what’s your go-to move when things get a bit too rowdy?
Share your thoughts, stories, and café etiquette tips in the comments below—let’s settle this debate once and for all!
Let’s set the scene. A Melbourne woman, seeking a peaceful spot to study with friends, settled into her favourite café. Books open, pens poised, the group was ready for a productive session. But just as they were getting into the groove, a group of mums with young children swooped in and took the seats right next to them—despite there being plenty of other tables available. The mums, as mums with little ones tend to be, were a bit on the noisy side.
Feeling a bit put out, the student took to Reddit to ask: 'Are we overreacting or is this extremely entitled?' She explained, '15 other seating options and this loud group of women with their loud kids sat right behind a few of us studying/reading. We are lightly debating this within our study group.'
She argued that, out of courtesy, the group could have chosen seats further away from those clearly seeking a quiet space. 'Personally, if I’m going to make noise or talk, I opt to sit where others are doing the same—or at least not sit near others that are clearly seeking a quiet space. To me, that’s considerate,' she wrote.
Do you think they are overreacting? Credit: r/FlinflanFluddle4 / Reddit
But as it turns out, the internet wasn’t exactly on her side.
The Great Café Debate: Who’s Right?
Some commenters did sympathise, agreeing that it’s a bit rude to plonk yourself (and your noisy brood) right next to someone who’s clearly studying, especially when there are other tables free. 'Let’s not deny the loud and rude exist. I’ve been in quite a few restaurants seated beside tables of neanderthals yelling at the top of their voices. Only solution is to move to a table far away or leave,' one person lamented.
Another added, 'I think it’s rude if there were a bunch of other tables available and they sat down right next to you reading and started being really loud.'
But the majority of responses were less sympathetic—and, in fact, turned the tables on the original poster. 'Yeah, it’s a café, not a library. Can’t expect people to be quiet,' one person pointed out. Another was even more blunt: 'Very entitled of you, yes. You’re studying in a public place, there will be noise. Grow up.'
Others chimed in with similar sentiments: 'It’s a café, so you’re going to have to put up with other people while you’re there. It’s a stretch to think that other people are going to deliberately go out of their way to make sure you have a nice barrier of quiet space.'
Some even suggested that if peace and quiet were so important, the student should have chosen a library or a park instead. 'You chose to study at a place designed for social gathering, that’s on you,' one commenter said. Another added, 'Go study and read at the library.'
Cafés: Social Hubs or Study Sanctuaries?
This little drama raises a bigger question: what are cafés actually for? Are they social spaces where chatter and laughter are part of the charm, or have they become the new libraries, where silence is golden and laptops rule the roost?
The truth is, cafés have always been a bit of both. They’re places to catch up with friends, hold informal meetings, or simply enjoy a moment of solitude with a good book. But as more people work and study remotely, the lines have blurred. It’s not uncommon to see laptops, textbooks, and even the odd Zoom call happening over a long black.
But with that flexibility comes a need for compromise. If you’re after absolute silence, a café might not be your best bet—especially during the busy morning rush or after-school hours. On the other hand, if you’re part of a noisy group, a little awareness of your surroundings can go a long way.
Aussie Café Etiquette: Is There a Middle Ground?
So, what’s the solution? Is there a secret code of café conduct we should all be following?
Here are a few tips for harmonious café coexistence:
Pick your time wisely: If you need quiet, try visiting during off-peak hours.
Scope out the space: If you’re in a group (especially with kids), maybe give solo diners or studiers a bit of space.
Bring headphones: If you’re studying or working, a good pair of noise-cancelling headphones can be a lifesaver.
Be flexible: If things get too noisy, don’t be afraid to move to another table—or another venue.
Remember, it’s a shared space: A little consideration goes a long way, no matter which side of the debate you’re on.
What Do You Think, SDC Members?
We know our community is full of seasoned café-goers, and we’d love to hear your take! Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Do you think cafés should be quiet sanctuaries, or is a bit of noise all part of the experience? And what’s your go-to move when things get a bit too rowdy?
Share your thoughts, stories, and café etiquette tips in the comments below—let’s settle this debate once and for all!
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