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The Joke Thread
Hey guys, I thought it might be fun for us to put our favourite (clean) joke in here... Let's see who can bring the most laughs to the table! I'll start.
A Father is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bedtime.
"God bless Mummy and god bless Daddy and god bless Grandma and... Goodbye Grandpa."
"Why did you say that?", he asks her?
"I don't know, I just felt like saying it", she replies.
The next day, grandpa drops dead. Wow, thinks Dad, that's an odd coincidence.
A month later at bedtime, the daughter says: "God bless Mummy and Daddy. And goodbye Grandma."
Sure enough, the next day Grandma breathes her last earthly breath.
The dad realises this is more than a coincidence, but he is not sure what to do. He doesn't want to disturb his wife by telling her.
Months go by and one night the man is listening to his daughter saying her prayers at bedtime.
"God bless Mummy....she turns her head and looks straight at him - and goodbye Daddy."
"What!? are you sure honey?"
She nods.
The man's heart begins racing and he breaks out in a sweat. He is so upset, he can't sleep at all that night. The next day he goes off to work, but locks himself in his office. He takes the phone off the hook, cancels all his meetings and awaits the inevitable. He stays at work past 5 because he feels secure there. He watches the hours tick by. Finally it is midnight and, drenched in sweat, he realises he has cheated death. He drives home drenched in sweat and with all his nerves frazzled.
His wife is up and waiting for him.
"Where the hell were you today??!"
He replies - "Don't shout, I've had an absolutely miserable day."
His wife then says - "You had a miserable day? I'm the one who had a miserable day! First, the milkman drops dead on the steps..."
