The Celebrity Gift Guide full of ‘overpriced cr*p’ – literally
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Disclaimer: This post is written for fun. We at SDC urge you to spend your money wisely this holiday season and don’t endorse the products in this ‘gift guide’.
American celebrities are the bread and butter of the entertainment industry – at least in Hollywood, that is. But since we Aussies also see them a lot in cinemas and on TV, they can hold a lot of influence over us – whether it’s a new fashion trend or a new food hack they’d like us to try.
So, it comes as no surprise that they want to share what their plans are for the holiday season.
And this is why Goop – Gwyneth Paltrow’s lifestyle company – released its annual gift guide. Spoiler alert: everything on this list is downright outrageous.
We’re not going to sugarcoat anything, members. Goop’s annual gift guide is absolutely insane, but it’s also everything we want it to be and more (hilarious).
At this point, we hope they’re only doing this for fun, but on the off-chance that they’re not…well then…
One of the wildest gift suggestions in the guide is a Gucci Waste Bag Holder…worth a little over AU $650. Yep, that’s right.
Hundreds of dollars for a designer ‘pooper-scooper’. You’re going to be begging your pooches to poo in front of everyone so you can make the most out of this ridiculous item.
The next item is a small, transparent speaker that’s priced at AU $1,021 (or USD 660). It basically looks like a glorified cassette tape…but it can’t play cassettes.
According to Goop, this is ‘one piece of technology that can evolve with you rather than becoming obsolete as the industry advances’.
Vague description (and an obvious mockery of the cassette tape) aside, we’re not sure how this item is any better than any of the budget speakers found on Amazon!
The next one on this list is the Kama Sutra Dinner Napkins, which cost AU $138. We’re not sure how these A-list celebs justify the cost of their products, but one thing we can say is that dinners will never be the same with this gift. Certainly don’t bring these out when the grandkids visit…
Goop’s next item is a Caviar Ornament worth AU $39. Out of all the items on this list, this is probably the only thing I (the writer of this article) can afford.
But then again, members, caviar only costs $6 at Woolies and the best part? They’re selling the kind that you can eat.
Strap in for the next item, folks, because Goop’s next item costs AU $44,580. The celebrity brand recommends the Tufted Boudoir Chaise as your next gift for your loved ones this holiday season, which is a little unorthodox, to say the least.
The chaise, which looks suspiciously like a refurbished hospital bed with stirrups, is decked out with multiple restraints – you know, for uh, creative nights in the bedroom.
Lastly, Goop recommends literal sh*t to give your loved ones this Christmas. No, we are not kidding.
According to Goop, ‘The Good Sh*t’ (the name of the product) is a bag of manure made from the ‘finest poop in LA’. But not to worry – the fertilizer is a blend of free-range goat, horse, chicken, and cow manure tended by their gardeners at Flamingo Estate and it costs AU $117.
You can find Goop’s entire gift guide list here. While we don’t recommend buying anything from this list, you can at least take a peek and have a good laugh while browsing through.
Key Takeaways
- Goop's annual Christmas gift guide has been released, and it includes some of the wildest suggestions we’ve ever heard.
- Among the suggestions are a designer poop bag, a cassette player speaker, and Kama Sutra dinner napkins.
- Goop is known for its over-the-top gift guides, and this year is no exception.