[Luckyus]

Smart Car​

A woman (because it has to be, OK?) went to the local Volkswagen dealer and said she wanted to make a cash purchase of the best car they had in the salesroom. The assistant immediately showed her a jet black 2.0L VW Golf TDI GT. Leather seats, heated as well, air con and every knick-knack you could dream of - so she bought it.

As she was driving home she switched the radio on but despite pressing the one single button a number of times, all she got was silence and an LCD display that blinked 'radio Choice'. Not satisfied, she drove back to the garage and accosted the salesman.

'The radio does not work' she announced. The salesman inclined his head slightly and announced it was voice activated. 'When madam desires a particular station, merely state the type of broadcast you want and the radio will automatically search for it - simple as that'.

So she leant into the car and said 'Country Music' - and lo and behold, Garth Brookes came on singing 'If Tomorrow Never Comes'. Happy, she drove off towards home.

En route she tried out the new voice activated radio: 'English Rock and Roll' and bang - The Rolling Stones singing 'Brown Sugar'. She tried again: 'Film themes' - bang! 'The John Dunbarr theme from Dances with Wolves'......

'Scottish Rock' - and on comes Runrig's 'Loch Lomand'.....'Soul' - James Brown appears giving it big licks.

As she sets off from a set of traffic lights she is suddenly forced to slam the brakes on as a boy racer cuts the lights ahead of her.

'phucking arsehole' Ass hole' she shouts.


The radio immediately found a Dan Andrews press conference.........