[Skipton]

Second Chance​

A 65-year-old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table she had a near death experience.. Seeing God
She asked, "Is my time up?"
God said, "No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a
Face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her
Teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as
Well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While
crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had
Another 33 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the
Ambulance?"
(You'll love this)
God replied:
" I didn't recognize you!!!!!"

 

[Sethia Soliman]

Okay, I REALLY love your jokes You're on a roll!

 

[Mistydolphin1]

Love it. At least it is original, most jokes l have seen have been on Facebook weeks before turning up here. Well done.

 

[margie]

so funny

 

[Xe]

I gave my wife $10,000 to get plastic surgery​

Last week she took the money, got the surgery and ran away.


So not only am i down 10 grand, i don't know who to look for.