Queensland Police roast the Poms after Ashes collapse, say they will launch an investigation
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Queensland Police roast the Poms after Ashes collapse, say they will launch an investigation
Day One of the first Ashes Test between Australia and England has caused such a commotion that police said that they will launch an investigation into England's embarrassing defeat.
England was humiliated by the Aussies, all out for just 147 inside 51 overs after English captain Joe Root won the toss and elected to bat on a gloomy day in Brisbane.
England's move to leave a collective 1156 Test wickets on the sideline after confirming that neither Jimmy Anderson nor Stuart Broad had made the final XI was heavily questioned by sports analysts.
However, it wasn't that bold move that posed the biggest problem for the Poms.
Mitchell Starc bowled Rory Burns with the first ball of the day and Pat Cummins took five wickets on his captaincy debut to bury England — an embarrassing defeat that sent the cricket world into a frenzy.
Queensland Police took to Twitter to roast the team, writing: “Queensland Police are launching an investigation into a group impersonating a Test batting order at the Gabba.”
Sportsbet, on the other hand, shared a photo of the team along with a satellite image of La Nina, suggesting that rain was the Poms' last hope.
If you thought us Aussies were harsh with our tirades against England, then we've got news for you...
The English media also showed no mercy to their home team either.
Former England player and coach David Lloyd wrote to the Daily Mail, saying: “England had to get through that first session and they were clearly not good enough to do so."
“Hindsight is a wonderful thing and we are all guilty of it but England would obviously have been better off bowling in those conditions.”
The Telegraph's Oliver Brown called the Poms' defeat a "timeless gift for self-sabotage" while Daily Mail journalist Lawrence Booth took a jab at England's decisions during the match.
“From the start, England provided little justification for Root’s decision to bat on a green surface whose preparation had been hampered by the weather,” he wrote.
“Was it bold? Definitely. Was it foolhardy? Probably. Regardless, there was only one way for England to lose the Test on the first day, and that was by batting in helpful conditions against Australia’s world-class attack."
“It was the 10th time they have been dismissed for under 200 this year — barely a basis for negotiation, let alone the foundations of an Ashes-winning bid. Almost before they have begun, Englands are chasing their tails.”
The English media did not mince their words as they joined the roasting party on England’s embarrassing Ashes Day 1 defeat. Credit: Bradley Kanaris/Getty Images.
Former cricketer and BBC sports broadcaster Jonathan Agnew described England's batsmen as "rabbits caught in headlights”.
Ollie Pope, England's second top-scorer with 35, blamed his teammates for not adjusting to the bounce in the Gabba wicket, noting that several batsmen were caught behind nicking balls they could have left on length.
“They bowled very well and the steepness of the bounce you get at the Gabba — the pitch felt quite soft and I think that tennis-ball bounce probably dragged a few shots that you don’t have to play,” Pope said.
“It’s probably the adjustments you have to make on a day-one Gabba pitch that we didn’t make quickly enough.”
Pope said that English will definitely bowl at the same level as Australia when the game resumes on Thursday, commenting that day one's action ended prematurely after heavy rain.
Pope said: “I think it will quicken up and the nicks will definitely carry so if we put it in the right areas early, hopefully, we can make some early inroads.”
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