[Luckyus]

Peeing On The Flowers​

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic rubbish bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 note fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 notes falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady.

"I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, officer."

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop.

"Where did you get all that money?

You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady.

"You see, my backyard is next to a Golf course.

A lot of golfers come and pee through a knothole in my fence, right into my flower garden.

It used to really tick me off... kills the flowers, you know.

Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it?'

So now, I stand behind the fence by the knothole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers and every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I grab hold of it and say, 'OK, buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes.

"That seems only fair," said the policeman, laughing.

"OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

 

[Emmy Im12]

Peeing On The Flowers​

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic rubbish bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 note fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 notes falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady.

"I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, officer."

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop.

"Where did you get all that money?

You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady.

"You see, my backyard is next to a Golf course.

A lot of golfers come and pee through a knothole in my fence, right into my flower garden.

It used to really tick me off... kills the flowers, you know.

Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it?'

So now, I stand behind the fence by the knothole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers and every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I grab hold of it and say, 'OK, buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes.

"That seems only fair," said the policeman, laughing.

"OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

Omg too funny!!

 

[hdhensel]

Shades of Thailand and the infamous walls along some streets

 

[Gazman]

TGIF - seems to be a theme of sorts today. Ha ha.

 

[margie]

 

[SirExton]

A guy goes into a chemist and asked, for a packet of condoms. The beautiful sales assistant say's "and what size would that be Sir?" The guy looks perplexed and says "I do not know?" The assistant says "in the back room there is a large board, with varying sized holes, if you start at the largest, inserting your manhood and work you way down to the smallest, you will then know the right size when the old fella fits perfectly!"

The guy goes into the back room, drops his trousers and inserts his old fella into the large hole, as he does this the sales assistant not wanting to miss an opportunity, in giving the best customer service. Races behind the other side of the board and enjoys herself with the protruding appendage and follows the guy down the line of hole sizes, until he fits perfectly into the right sized hole in the board.

On finishing he dons his trousers and walks back into the front of the Chemist shop. The beautiful sales assistant is again stood behind the counter again, with a smile on her face and says "now what size condoms would you like Sir?" The guy say "stuff the condoms, how much do you want for that board?"

 

[Sebastian Pereira]

Peeing On The Flowers​

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic rubbish bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 note fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 notes falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady.

"I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, officer."

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop.

"Where did you get all that money?

You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady.

"You see, my backyard is next to a Golf course.

A lot of golfers come and pee through a knothole in my fence, right into my flower garden.

It used to really tick me off... kills the flowers, you know.

Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it?'

So now, I stand behind the fence by the knothole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers and every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I grab hold of it and say, 'OK, buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes.

"That seems only fair," said the policeman, laughing.

"OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

Lol The Old lady is cutting off penises and collecting them Lol why doesn't she just seal off the peep hole Hahaha I suppose she likes feeling them Hahaha

 

[Sebastian Pereira]

A guy goes into a chemist and asked, for a packet of condoms. The beautiful sales assistant say's "and what size would that be Sir?" The guy looks perplexed and says "I do not know?" The assistant says "in the back room there is a large board, with varying sized holes, if you start at the largest, inserting your manhood and work you way down to the smallest, you will then know the right size when the old fella fits perfectly!"

The guy goes into the back room, drops his trousers and inserts his old fella into the large hole, as he does this the sales assistant not wanting to miss an opportunity, in giving the best customer service. Races behind the other side of the board and enjoys herself with the protruding appendage and follows the guy down the line of hole sizes, until he fits perfectly into the right sized hole in the board.

On finishing he dons his trousers and walks back into the front of the Chemist shop. The beautiful sales assistant is again stood behind the counter again, with a smile on her face and says "now what size condoms would you like Sir?" The guy say "stuff the condoms, how much do you want for that board?"

Lol good one Sir could you give me the name on the chemist and the address Hahaha

 

[Nanna@Goulburn]

Only yesterday a train was stopped because electric wires came down onto the roof people weren’t allowed to exit the train and one poor guy could wait no longer had to turn himself into a corner and let go how embarrassing would that be?

 

[London Lad]

Peeing On The Flowers​

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic rubbish bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 note fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 notes falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady.

"I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, officer."

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop.

"Where did you get all that money?

You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady.

"You see, my backyard is next to a Golf course.

A lot of golfers come and pee through a knothole in my fence, right into my flower garden.

It used to really tick me off... kills the flowers, you know.

Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it?'

So now, I stand behind the fence by the knothole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers and every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I grab hold of it and say, 'OK, buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes.

"That seems only fair," said the policeman, laughing.

"OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

Very funny