Networking Down Under: Expats struggle to find ‘mate’-ship in Australia's social scene
- Replies 11
In a world increasingly connected by technology, the experience of relocating to a new country remains a daunting prospect for many. Whether driven by career opportunities, personal relationships, or a thirst for adventure, expats often find themselves grappling with the challenge of forging meaningful connections in unfamiliar surroundings.
For one Swedish traveller embarking on a new chapter in Australia, the journey to build a social network can be particularly complex, navigating cultural nuances and overcoming the barriers of distance and language.
Despite the allure of picturesque landscapes and vibrant cityscapes, the reality of loneliness looms large for some as they navigate the complexities of settling into their adopted home.
The Swedish woman took to social media to express her concerns after noticing that Australian expats in Sweden were struggling to form friendships.
She compared this to the ‘Swedish social mentality’, which she described as a closed-off environment where making new friends outside of school or university is exceptionally challenging.
‘How do people make friends in Australia?’ she inquired.
‘I've read multiple threads of Australians moving to Sweden, and others who live or have lived here don't recommend it because it is hard to make (non-expat) friends.’
Her question sparked a flurry of responses from Australians and expats alike, many of whom lamented the difficulty of expanding their social circles in Australia.
One respondent from Perth described the city as ‘lonely’, while another branded Australians as ‘flaky’ and unreliable when it comes to maintaining friendships.
‘Most people [in Sweden] form their circles during school, at the latest during university years, and if you don't succeed in forming a circle of friends during those years, then tough luck,’ the expat shared.
‘I can sympathise, I myself belong to the category that largely missed out during that window of opportunity. It is not impossible to make friends if you miss out, but much, much harder.’
‘I am curious to learn, how do people make friends in Australia? Are people largely open to making new friends throughout their lives, after their formative years, or how does it work? How is it different?’ she added.
Some individuals expressed their opinions on the matter, with one providing valuable insight into the situation.
‘Starting over from scratch can be hard no matter where you find yourself,’ they pointed out.
‘And the contrast would be especially visible if you already have a decent social network in the place you left behind.’
Meanwhile, others suggested that there are particular ‘phases’ during which it is simpler to form friendships.
‘There are different stages in your life where it is easy to expand your circle of friends. I am in my mid-60s and can identify them: school, university, work, parents from your child's school, and social groups from clubs,’ one commenter explained.
‘Your best bet is with other foreigners or with people who have recently moved cities,’ another advised.
A third added, ‘I think the job you have makes a difference. I'm a doctor and have worked with so many different people in hospitals that I've made a few long-lasting friendships as an adult that way. We also get bonded by shared difficult experiences.’
However, one individual provided a pessimistic perspective on Australians and their social circles.
‘Honestly, we don't [make friends]. We're not friendly people. We cancel plans at a moment's notice and don't invite anyone into our circles beyond our 20s. We'll say “Hi, how are you” to the cashier but never ask our friends if they're happy,’ they commented.
‘Then we just let each friend drift away until it's just us, our spouse, and our dog. Our social life then involves dreaded family events and a strong desire to live as isolated as possible in between.’
As expats navigate the challenges of building friendships in a new country, the quest for meaningful connections remains a universal pursuit, and for Swedish individuals settling into life in Australia, overcoming loneliness as adult expats requires understanding and adapting to the cultural dynamics of their adopted home.
While forging friendships may present hurdles, particularly in a foreign environment, the importance of companionship resonates across all stages of life.
Transitioning from expat experiences to the golden years, the significance of lasting friendships remains paramount.
Seniors embarking on this journey seek not only companionship but also the key to nurturing enduring relationships as they navigate the complexities of aging.
Have you found it challenging to expand your social circle in Australia? What strategies have you used to meet new people and maintain friendships? We invite you to share your experiences and tips on making friends later in life.
For one Swedish traveller embarking on a new chapter in Australia, the journey to build a social network can be particularly complex, navigating cultural nuances and overcoming the barriers of distance and language.
Despite the allure of picturesque landscapes and vibrant cityscapes, the reality of loneliness looms large for some as they navigate the complexities of settling into their adopted home.
The Swedish woman took to social media to express her concerns after noticing that Australian expats in Sweden were struggling to form friendships.
She compared this to the ‘Swedish social mentality’, which she described as a closed-off environment where making new friends outside of school or university is exceptionally challenging.
‘How do people make friends in Australia?’ she inquired.
‘I've read multiple threads of Australians moving to Sweden, and others who live or have lived here don't recommend it because it is hard to make (non-expat) friends.’
Her question sparked a flurry of responses from Australians and expats alike, many of whom lamented the difficulty of expanding their social circles in Australia.
One respondent from Perth described the city as ‘lonely’, while another branded Australians as ‘flaky’ and unreliable when it comes to maintaining friendships.
‘Most people [in Sweden] form their circles during school, at the latest during university years, and if you don't succeed in forming a circle of friends during those years, then tough luck,’ the expat shared.
‘I can sympathise, I myself belong to the category that largely missed out during that window of opportunity. It is not impossible to make friends if you miss out, but much, much harder.’
‘I am curious to learn, how do people make friends in Australia? Are people largely open to making new friends throughout their lives, after their formative years, or how does it work? How is it different?’ she added.
Some individuals expressed their opinions on the matter, with one providing valuable insight into the situation.
‘Starting over from scratch can be hard no matter where you find yourself,’ they pointed out.
‘And the contrast would be especially visible if you already have a decent social network in the place you left behind.’
Meanwhile, others suggested that there are particular ‘phases’ during which it is simpler to form friendships.
‘There are different stages in your life where it is easy to expand your circle of friends. I am in my mid-60s and can identify them: school, university, work, parents from your child's school, and social groups from clubs,’ one commenter explained.
‘Your best bet is with other foreigners or with people who have recently moved cities,’ another advised.
A third added, ‘I think the job you have makes a difference. I'm a doctor and have worked with so many different people in hospitals that I've made a few long-lasting friendships as an adult that way. We also get bonded by shared difficult experiences.’
However, one individual provided a pessimistic perspective on Australians and their social circles.
‘Honestly, we don't [make friends]. We're not friendly people. We cancel plans at a moment's notice and don't invite anyone into our circles beyond our 20s. We'll say “Hi, how are you” to the cashier but never ask our friends if they're happy,’ they commented.
‘Then we just let each friend drift away until it's just us, our spouse, and our dog. Our social life then involves dreaded family events and a strong desire to live as isolated as possible in between.’
As expats navigate the challenges of building friendships in a new country, the quest for meaningful connections remains a universal pursuit, and for Swedish individuals settling into life in Australia, overcoming loneliness as adult expats requires understanding and adapting to the cultural dynamics of their adopted home.
While forging friendships may present hurdles, particularly in a foreign environment, the importance of companionship resonates across all stages of life.
Transitioning from expat experiences to the golden years, the significance of lasting friendships remains paramount.
Seniors embarking on this journey seek not only companionship but also the key to nurturing enduring relationships as they navigate the complexities of aging.
Key Takeaways
- A Swedish woman highlighted the difficulties expats face in forming friendships in Australia, especially outside of school and university years.
- Australians and expats alike shared their struggles with expanding social circles, with some describing Perth as ‘lonely’ and Australians as ‘flaky’.
- Several contributors to the discussion suggested that there are certain life ‘phases’ where making new friends is easier, such as during school, university, work, and through social clubs.
- The overarching sentiment from the discussion was that making friends in Australia can be challenging, particularly for those who have moved cities or are from other countries, with Australians being perceived as less open to widening their social circles later in life.