[Luckyus]

Foibles of The English Languauge​

A bicycle can’t stand alone, it is two tired

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

A dentist and a manicurist married - they fought tooth and nail.

A thief who stole a calendar... got twelve months.

A will is a dead giveaway.

Acupuncture: A jab well done.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all-right now.

I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.

I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I Noah guy.

A new type of broom came out, it is sweeping the nation.

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said "No change yet".

The new weed whacker is cutting-hedge technology.

Some people’s noses and feet are built backwards: their feet SMELL and their noses RUN

When William joined the army he disliked the phrase ‘fire at will’. \
(Although I understand that someone liked the idea?)

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.