Feeling lonely? Discover the innovative ways adults are making new friends

No doubt about it, our world is a very different place from the one our parents and grandparents experienced.

Thanks to technology and globalisation, we’re more connected than ever – you can Skype, Facetime, and Zoom your way across the world, so surely loneliness should be a thing of the past?



Sadly, as a recent Australian report uncovered, social isolation is still an epidemic, with nearly one in three people in our country feeling lonely.

It certainly didn’t come as a surprise to Sophie McIntyre – when Sophie relocated to Melbourne from Queensland, she was thrown into a new world where adult friendships suddenly seemed a lot harder to come by.



It wasn’t just Sophie who had this experience. Take Jessie Wright, for example – after making the move from South Australia to Melbourne with her partner before the pandemic, Jessie’s entire social network collapsed in an instant after the couple split.



Screenshot 2023-10-16 at 10.35.14 AM.png
Jessie Wright realised she needed to step up to socialise and make new friends. Credit: Instagram



With this newfound free time in the dark days of lockdown, Jessie quickly realised she needed to step up her efforts in making new friends if she wanted to have a fulfilling social life.

Feeling brave and inspired, Jessie set herself a monumental challenge – to have dinner with a stranger once a week for a year.

Yep, that means 52 friendship dates with complete strangers. Gulp.

Started as just a side project, with her weekly dinner dates helping Jessie to ‘test the waters’ of Melbourne, it quickly grew into a ten-month-long journey (so far!) of profound connections and conversations.

Far from finding her goal stifling and hard work, Jessie said she was thankful for the opportunity to leave her comfort zone.



'[It] was just this amazing moment of connecting with someone and doing it and being like, ‘This wasn't just okay, this was great’,' said Jessie.

Her insight has resonated with many fellow Australians also on a journey to make new friends, with people reaching out to her daily to share their stories and ask for friendship advice.

Sophie McIntyre had a similar life-changing experience, although she found her inspiration in a much wider group – the entire adult population of Melbourne!


Image 10-16-23 at 11.05 AM.jpeg
Sophie McIntyre founded Club Sup in 2021. Credit: Instagram




Determined to break the stigma of adult loneliness, Sophie was shocked to see how many of Melbourne’s citizens were just ‘too busy’ to make meaningful connections with the people around them.

So, she decided to rally everyone together.



Club Sup, founded by Sophie in 2021, has become the ultimate dinner club for adults looking for new friends.

The initiative has since launched in both Melbourne and Sydney and has seen over two hundred strangers come together over food, enjoying camaraderie in a peaceful and inviting environment.

According to Sophie, the response has been extraordinary – not just the interest, but also the end result.



'It was very interesting to watch people come, and they're pretty nervous, but then they just completely melt away. They become so invigorated by the experience, it's so interesting to watch,' she said.

It’s not just Sophie and Jessie who have noticed something significant about loneliness – psychologists and researchers have too, uncovering health risks that extend far beyond the social stigma of the emotion.



Australian clinical psychologist and researcher, Dr Michelle Lim, said the physical repercussions of loneliness are as real as they are damaging, and that individuals need to be more proactive in making meaningful connections.

'When we feel like we don't have those meaningful connections, physiologically, our brains are processing more stress. We then have more stress through our systems, which impacts our physical health,' explained Dr Lim.

She goes on to add that the steps towards connection don’t have to be as drastic as having fortnightly dinners with strangers – just small and small, conscious efforts are enough in the long run.

'It's about having those minor social interactions which can change strangers into acquaintances, and eventually, acquaintances into friends,' Dr Lim said.

Key Takeaways

  • Almost one in three Australians feel lonely, according to a landmark Australian report on loneliness.
  • Sophie McIntyre established Club Sup, a monthly dinner party for 20 strangers to connect over food, responding to the loss of community and the rise of loneliness she noticed during the COVID pandemic.
  • Jessie Wright started a personal project of having dinner with a stranger once a week for a year, to actively make new friends.
  • Clinical psychologist and researcher Michelle Lim advises being deliberate in making and nurturing friendships and highlights the detrimental health impacts of chronic loneliness.


So, the takeaway from this? Making meaningful connections, whether borne out of necessity or the desire to expand your network, is so much more than just ‘filling time’ or creating a ‘brief distraction’.

It’s about embracing happiness and contentment and doing something that will benefit you both socially and emotionally in the long term.

If you’re feeling eager to take on something new, why not try taking a page out of Jessie and Sophie’s books and challenging yourself to meet a new friend or two each month?

At the Seniors Discount Club, we’re all for being brave and having a go – just throw yourself into it, and you might be pleasantly surprised by the results!
 
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No doubt about it, our world is a very different place from the one our parents and grandparents experienced.

Thanks to technology and globalisation, we’re more connected than ever – you can Skype, Facetime, and Zoom your way across the world, so surely loneliness should be a thing of the past?



Sadly, as a recent Australian report uncovered, social isolation is still an epidemic, with nearly one in three people in our country feeling lonely.

It certainly didn’t come as a surprise to Sophie McIntyre – when Sophie relocated to Melbourne from Queensland, she was thrown into a new world where adult friendships suddenly seemed a lot harder to come by.



It wasn’t just Sophie who had this experience. Take Jessie Wright, for example – after making the move from South Australia to Melbourne with her partner before the pandemic, Jessie’s entire social network collapsed in an instant after the couple split.



View attachment 32264
Jessie Wright realised she needed to step up to socialise and make new friends. Credit: Instagram



With this newfound free time in the dark days of lockdown, Jessie quickly realised she needed to step up her efforts in making new friends if she wanted to have a fulfilling social life.

Feeling brave and inspired, Jessie set herself a monumental challenge – to have dinner with a stranger once a week for a year.

Yep, that means 52 friendship dates with complete strangers. Gulp.

Started as just a side project, with her weekly dinner dates helping Jessie to ‘test the waters’ of Melbourne, it quickly grew into a ten-month-long journey (so far!) of profound connections and conversations.

Far from finding her goal stifling and hard work, Jessie said she was thankful for the opportunity to leave her comfort zone.



'[It] was just this amazing moment of connecting with someone and doing it and being like, ‘This wasn't just okay, this was great’,' said Jessie.

Her insight has resonated with many fellow Australians also on a journey to make new friends, with people reaching out to her daily to share their stories and ask for friendship advice.

Sophie McIntyre had a similar life-changing experience, although she found her inspiration in a much wider group – the entire adult population of Melbourne!


View attachment 32265
Sophie McIntyre founded Club Sup in 2021. Credit: Instagram




Determined to break the stigma of adult loneliness, Sophie was shocked to see how many of Melbourne’s citizens were just ‘too busy’ to make meaningful connections with the people around them.

So, she decided to rally everyone together.



Club Sup, founded by Sophie in 2021, has become the ultimate dinner club for adults looking for new friends.

The initiative has since launched in both Melbourne and Sydney and has seen over two hundred strangers come together over food, enjoying camaraderie in a peaceful and inviting environment.

According to Sophie, the response has been extraordinary – not just the interest, but also the end result.



'It was very interesting to watch people come, and they're pretty nervous, but then they just completely melt away. They become so invigorated by the experience, it's so interesting to watch,' she said.

It’s not just Sophie and Jessie who have noticed something significant about loneliness – psychologists and researchers have too, uncovering health risks that extend far beyond the social stigma of the emotion.



Australian clinical psychologist and researcher, Dr Michelle Lim, said the physical repercussions of loneliness are as real as they are damaging, and that individuals need to be more proactive in making meaningful connections.

'When we feel like we don't have those meaningful connections, physiologically, our brains are processing more stress. We then have more stress through our systems, which impacts our physical health,' explained Dr Lim.

She goes on to add that the steps towards connection don’t have to be as drastic as having fortnightly dinners with strangers – just small and small, conscious efforts are enough in the long run.

'It's about having those minor social interactions which can change strangers into acquaintances, and eventually, acquaintances into friends,' Dr Lim said.

Key Takeaways

  • Almost one in three Australians feel lonely, according to a landmark Australian report on loneliness.
  • Sophie McIntyre established Club Sup, a monthly dinner party for 20 strangers to connect over food, responding to the loss of community and the rise of loneliness she noticed during the COVID pandemic.
  • Jessie Wright started a personal project of having dinner with a stranger once a week for a year, to actively make new friends.
  • Clinical psychologist and researcher Michelle Lim advises being deliberate in making and nurturing friendships and highlights the detrimental health impacts of chronic loneliness.


So, the takeaway from this? Making meaningful connections, whether borne out of necessity or the desire to expand your network, is so much more than just ‘filling time’ or creating a ‘brief distraction’.

It’s about embracing happiness and contentment and doing something that will benefit you both socially and emotionally in the long term.

If you’re feeling eager to take on something new, why not try taking a page out of Jessie and Sophie’s books and challenging yourself to meet a new friend or two each month?

At the Seniors Discount Club, we’re all for being brave and having a go – just throw yourself into it, and you might be pleasantly surprised by the results!

I have moved to regional Victoria from Melbourne Loneliness has been creeping in ... I am left feeling I don’t belong . I am retired finding it impossible to make friends .. I don’t do bingo cards bowls .. I Joined a knitting / crochet group treated like am not there ver6 much the outsider … So I have started either driving 2 hrs each way to Melbourne or taking a slower train ride to see my friends
I have found people are just so unfriendly when it comes to someone new in town.
 
Hopefully she is picking her dinner partners with care as so many unscrupulous people out there out to take advantage of lonely people. Volunteering if you have the time and are able to is also a good way to meet and make new friends, especially for older people.
 
Well I had the opposite experience- maybe I was just lucky but, I’ve never been a joiner of clubs/ churches/ interest groups- but when I left Sydney to retire in Brisbane, Covid struck 2 months in from my move and I went nowhere for 2 years. Then we were all allowed to meet up again and mandatory masks went - so I joined the local Probus club.
From day one I was welcomed and encouraged to come back and meet more people, went on an outing and decided to join. I have made a number of friends and acquaintances now and am on the committee as the hospitality officer. I love it and it is just enough to keep me connected without taking over my life.
I can recommend it to anyone feeling that it’s hard to make new friends in your seventies
 
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I have moved to regional Victoria from Melbourne Loneliness has been creeping in ... I am left feeling I don’t belong . I am retired finding it impossible to make friends .. I don’t do bingo cards bowls .. I Joined a knitting / crochet group treated like am not there ver6 much the outsider … So I have started either driving 2 hrs each way to Melbourne or taking a slower train ride to see my friends
I have found people are just so unfriendly when it comes to someone new in town.
😢😢that’s so awful.
 

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