Fantastic joke by Walter H.
Sister Margaret was a model nun all of her life, until she was called to get her
just rewards. As she approached the pearly gates, Saint Peter said "Hold on,
Sister Margaret...not so fast!"
"But I have been good all my life and dedicated to the work of the Lord. From
the time I was taken in as an infant by the sisters at the convent to my dying
breath... I have lived for this moment!" Sister Margaret exclaimed in disbelief.
"That is precisely the problem," replied St. Peter, "...you never learned right
from wrong and to get into heaven, you must know the difference between
right and wrong".
"Well, what can I do? I will do anything to get into heaven!" Sister Margaret
pleaded.
"I am going to have to send you back down to Earth. When you get there,
I want you to smoke a cigarette and call me when you are finished. We will
discuss your situation then." ordered St. Peter.
Sister Margaret returned to Earth, smoked a Camel, and then immediately
called St. Peter, coughing and hacking. "Saint Peter" she gasped, "I can hardly
breathe, my mouth tastes terrible, my breath stinks, I feel dizzy, and I think I
am going to throw up".
"Good!" replied the old saint, "Now you are finally getting a feel for right and
wrong. Now go out tonight and drink some hard liquor and call me back when
you are ready."
Sister Margaret phoned St. Peter immediately after taking several belts of
Jack Daniels.
"Saint Peter, I feel woozy... that vile liquid burned my throat and nauseated me...
it is all I can do to keep it down."
"Good...good! Now you are starting to see the difference between right and
wrong," said St. Peter with delight.
"Tomorrow I want you to seek out a man and know him in the Biblical sense,
and then call me."
A week passed before Sister Margaret called St. Peter and left a message:
"Yo, Pete...it's Peggy…It’s gonna be awhile!"