[Mikev]

Dad Joke ​

I finally did it!
Bought a new pair of shoes with memory foam insoles.

Now there’ll be no more forgetting why I walked into the kitchen.

 

[Dennis]

Dennis R's. Morning Joke. I am Looking for my wife.
Two guys one old and I young are pushing their carts around a large furniture store when they collided, the old guy said sorry about that, but I am looking for my wife and was not paying attention, the young guy said that's OK its a coincidence But I am looking for my wife as well and I am getting worried, The old guy said perhaps we can help each other what does your wife look like? the young guy says she is 24 yrs. old, with blond hair, blue eyes and long legs, big boobs and she is wearing tight white shorts, a halter top and she is wearing no bra, what does your wife look like? the old guy says that does not matter let's look for yours.

 

[magpie1]

That's if I can remember where I have left them....

 

[Reet]

A woman went to the doctor's office to get some medication for her elderly husband. The doctor said, "I want him to take two of these pills every Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday and then skip the remaining days of the week."
Three weeks later the woman returned to inform the doctor that her husband had died of a heart attack.
"I'm sorry to hear that", said the doctor. "I just don/t undertand it. Your husband had no history of heart trouble. I hope it wasn't a side effect of the medication."
"Oh no," said the wife "the pills were fine. It was the skipping that killed him."

 

[dianearnold]

Was she blond?