[Luckyus]

At The Doctors​

A man went to the doctor’s office to get a double dose of Viagra.

The doctor told him that he couldn’t allow him a double dose.

“Why not?” asked the man.

“Because it’s not safe,” replied the doctor.

“But I need it really bad,” said the man.

“Well, why do you need it so badly?” asked the doctor.

The man said, “My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday.

My ex-wife will be here on Saturday, and my wife is coming home on Sunday.

Can’t you see? I must have a double dose.”

The doctor finally relented saying, “Okay, I’ll give it to you,

but you have to come in on Monday morning so that I can check you to see if there are any side effects.”

On Monday, the man dragged himself in; his arm in a sling.

The doctor asked, “What happened to you?”

The man said, “No one showed up.”

 

[Ivory]

Come again??

 

[Suzanne rose]

 

[Dennis]

All hands to the pump.

Dennis R's Morning Pun. What kind of dress cannot be worn? Your address.

 

[Sierra040]

Very funny. One I hadn’t heard before

 

[mOiOz]

Very handy!!!

 

[Luckyus]

Very handy!!!

Mrs Wright and her five wee bairns.

 

[mOiOz]

Mrs Wright and her five wee bairns.

I thought it was Mrs Palmer!

 

[etphhome]

 

[Reet]

Two elderly women are eating breakfast one morning when one of them notices something funny about her friend's ear.
"Mildred, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?"
"Do I really, a suppository?" Mildred pulls it out and stares at it. "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I know where my hearing aid is."

 

[magpie1]

Two elderly women are eating breakfast one morning when one of them notices something funny about her friend's ear.
"Mildred, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?"
"Do I really, a suppository?" Mildred pulls it out and stares at it. "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I know where my hearing aid is."

No wonder the poor woman's hearing has turned to .........

 

[Luckyus]

I thought it was Mrs Palmer!

Ninety Nine, One Hundred change Hands

 

[DannyKaye]

Ninety Nine, One Hundred change Hands

ninety nine, one hundred, I don't care if I go blind.

 

[Luckyus]

ninety nine, one hundred, I don't care if I go blind.

My is Alf,
I pull myself'
I think it's good to pull my "PUD,"
I really don't mind if I blind.
Well just as long as I only have to wear glasses

 

[UruauP]

Two elderly women are eating breakfast one morning when one of them notices something funny about her friend's ear.
"Mildred, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?"
"Do I really, a suppository?" Mildred pulls it out and stares at it. "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I know where my hearing aid is."

I need that for a good healthy laugh.