[Luckyus]

Aldi​

One day, in line at the works cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him,
'My elbow hurts like hell. I suppose I'd better see a doctor!'

'Listen mate; don't waste your time down at the surgery', Mike
replies. 'There's a diagnostic computer at Aldi. Just give it a urine
sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong, and what to do about it.

It takes ten seconds and only costs five dollars....a lot quicker and
better than a doctor and you get Club points'

So Jack collects a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Aldi.

He deposits five dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the
urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
activity. It will improve in two weeks'.

That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was,

Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and 'pleasured himself' into the mixture
for good measure.

Jack hurried back to Aldi, eager to check what would
happen.

He deposits five dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the
results with a grin.

The computer prints the following:

1) Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.

2) Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.

3) Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.

4) Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.

5) And if you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never
get better....

Thank you for shopping at Aldi ......

Every little helps.