[Danielle G.]

AIBU 27.09.2024​

AIBU, which stands for 'Am I Being Unreasonable', is the perfect platform for sharing your thoughts and opinions! So, for today's AIBU discussion, we have this story from Reddit/aitahearingaides:

Am I being unreasonable for suing my cousin to pay for my hearing aids he damaged when he threw me in the pool?

'My cousin has always been the golden child of our generation. He’s funny, good looking, and out going, not to mention a boy amongst girls. He’s always loved to mess around and play pranks. For the record, I really dislike this cousin. I think he’s irresponsible, childish, and annoying.'

'I have had hearing problems for years. I recently got a $6,000 pair of hearing aids.'

'Recently at my grandmothers birthday party, we were all eating and drinking on the back porch. My grandmother has a pool. My cousin decided he was going to throw me in the pool because it would be funny to ruin my hair that I just got done that day. I repeatedly told him to stop and put me down, in a very serious and not playful at all tone.'

'He threw me in the pool, and my hearing aids were ruined. Afterwards, when I told him what happened, he basically said: whoops, didn’t know you had hearing aides now. When I told him the cost of them and that he would have to replace them he freaked out, and said no way.'

'My family didn’t want me to make him pay for them because I significantly out earn him and also everyone else in the family. He was in college at the time, barely making ends meet in a call center job. His girlfriend and him have a baby, and they live in a one bedroom apartment.'

'He refused to pay, so I took him to court. I won. He refused to make the payments after, so I took him back to court and his wages are now being garnished for the maximum amount, which is 20% of his total wages. It pushed him over the edge of what he could afford, so he’s had to work extra and drop out of college to be able to pay their rent.'

'My family is absolutely fuming at me. I think he made one bad choice after the other, and he has never given a sincere apology during this whole ordeal. Had he given a real apology after the incident and asked if he could wait till he finished school to pay me back, I would’ve been fine with it. Am I being unreasonable?'

 

[what]

No not unreasonable, $6,000 is a lot of money. If your family are so annoyed at you asking for your cousin (who sounds to be fairly irresponsible) to replace them - the family could have got together and all given money (your cousin included)to help replace your hearing aids.

 

[Jennylolo]

he's not a child, and incomes don't come into it.

 

[Ell Margery]

I don't think you are being unreasonable. Fun activities in any gatherings are great, however this time round the consequences is costly to you. He ignored your resistance & pleas not to throw you in the pool in the first place. As a consequence of his desire to create fun for himself to your detriment he should & MUST man-up, recognise the importance of the damage to your hearing aid, an essential device that adds to providing you a better quality of life.

The fact that he doesn't see the seriousness of your loss as a result of his stupidity & his rather blaze' attitude &/or refusal to apologise for the damage speaks volumes about what & who he really is as a man...a childish, uncaring & immature person who needs a lot of growing up to do yet.
And by the way what is he doing producing a child? Seriously he hasn't grown up yet to own up & take responsibilities for his own actions. His kind of fun resulted in your loss - & may I add a very expensive loss at that...a piece of item that is essential for your livelihood?

I'm so happy that you refused to let members of your family persuade you not to make him pay for the damage. How irresponsible...he even refused to pay what the court ordered him to which resulted in your going back to court the 2nd time (a very time consuming & can be costly exercise at the best of times, I'd say) to get a garnishee order.
Well, it is now to his financial detriment...he cannot refuse nor escape from this order & I'm sure will cause him a lot of financial heartach.
Had he done what was right as a close family member, I'm sure you would have shown him some leniency & organised a better form of payment, given that his earnings are lower than what you earn.
Good on you, he deserves his income to be garnisheed & I do hope he has learnt a valuable lesson for his immature attitude. I hope he will learn that life is not all fun & games after all!!

 

[maxesmum]

Nope! I’d have sued him,too! And added the cost of my stylist on top!

 

[DiBoz]

If the family are all so angry about it why don’t they help with the cost and put some money towards your new heating aids to help him out.

 

[Luckyus]

Should have given him a good kick in the bollocks as well, the arsehole.

 

[Suzanne rose]

I don't think you need to ask everyone their opinion.

You already took him to court, then took him to court again .
This would not have happened over night but most likely around 2 years.

When he was carrying you to the pool why didn't you tell him you had hearing aides.
Why didn't you punch or kick him ?

I agree maybe all your family plus him should have put in and paid for your hearing aides.

I wonder how old these two are ?

She also sounds like she was already very bitter .

Most modern hearing aid models have an IP68 rating, meaning they can withstand dirt, dust, sand and being submerged in water. In fact, many hearing aids can get to a maximum depth of 1.5 metres under water for 30 minutes

I think there is more to this story ...there is always 2 sides to every story

 

[DLHM]

She told him “no” in a serious manner, but he disregarded her. He should have respected her wishes.

I know someone who was thrown in a pool (in fun), despite her objections, but she had her phone in her pocket. She was not amused.

 

[Suzanne rose]

She told him “no” in a serious manner, but he disregarded her. He should have respected her wishes.

I know someone who was thrown in a pool (in fun), despite her objections, but she had her phone in her pocket. She was not amused.

I would like to know what her other relatives were doing

 

[DLHM]

I would like to know what her other relatives were doing

Maybe he was a bully and the family members didn’t want to oppose him?

 

[SJ-G]

Nope! I’d have sued him,too! And added the cost of my stylist on top!

Absolutely since he only did it to ruin the hairdo.

 

[Ezzy]

Had he been apologetic immediately, offered to pay something towards those hearing aids & not replied with 'no way' when told he'd have to replace them, the situation may have had a different conclusion for him.

Were these hearing aides covered under any Insurance Policy you have?

 

[siahwaninn64]

A lesson learned for him. He need to grow up.

 

[marni]

Very immature. If he had such little money what was he doing having a child? I would have checked out insurance and told him
How much the excess was. It seems you will be regarded as a mean person by the family, I hope they see him as an irresponsible member