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Sethia Soliman

Sethia Soliman

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Jan 26, 2022
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AIBU 20.05.2024

AIBU, which stands for 'Am I Being Unreasonable', is the perfect platform for sharing your thoughts and opinions! So, for today's AIBU discussion, we have this story from Reddit/@Necessary-Wall-6446:

Am I being unreasonable for walking out of the bridal salon when I found out my friends were making fun of me behind my back?


'I have two friends: Gaby and Shelly. We were roommates in university and stayed in the same city after graduating. While the three of us are close, I’ve always known that Gaby and Shelly are the closest. They have a really sweet friendship.'

'Shelly is getting married, Gaby is the maid of honour, and I’m one of the bridesmaids. Over the weekend, I went with Shelly so she could look at wedding dresses. Gaby was supposed to come with us but got called into work last minute. I helped Shelly pick out some dresses, and then she went with the consultant to try them on. Shelly asked that I take pictures and videos on her phone to send to her mum and Gaby.'

'I was getting the camera ready when a text from Gaby came through. I didn’t mean to click on it and was instantly going to click back out when I saw one of my Instagram pictures in their private chat from earlier that morning. Both of them were making fun of me for the face I was making and my outfit choice. It didn’t appear to be of very good nature.'

'I admit, my curiosity got the best of me so I searched my name in the chat. I found multiple pictures that I, my boyfriend or my mum have posted of myself. They absolutely ripped me to shreds, ranging from selfies to posed shots to even a few baby pictures. They’d also make fun of me in general in terms of the way I talked, wore my hair and the way I ate. This went back as far as I could tell, at least a year.'


'My heart broke. It all felt so juvenile and high school-like. While we all joke around, I would never do this to them nor have they ever even tried to instigate these types of conversations with me about the other one on one. I was in tears. As someone who was bullied all through middle and high school, it just brought me back to a horrible place. I put the phone in Shelly’s purse and brought it to another employee, telling her to tell Shelly that I had to go. I drove home and had a long cry.'

'Shelly texted me by the time I made it home asking where I went. I said I was going home and we could talk later. When she did call a few hours later, she was understandably confused and hurt that I left. I told her what I found, explaining that I only looked further because of the initial text I accidentally saw. She went off on me for looking through her private texts and said those were none of my business. She also told me I shouldn’t have left the store without saying anything. I said I didn’t want to make a scene but I also knew I couldn’t fake being happy for her.'

'Shelly told me the texts were “all in good fun” and clearly, she loves me because I’m going to be her bridesmaid. She added that I’m only hurt because I chose to read all those texts. Later on, Gaby called to tell me that I invaded Shelly’s privacy and hurt her by walking out.'

'My boyfriend and mum think I did the right thing by walking out. But obviously, they’re a little biased. I just want some unbiased advice. Am I being unreasonable to look through the texts and then leave?'

We're eager to hear your perspectives, members! Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.
 
It's a shame the truth had to be found in such a way.
However, I truly believe that separation from the group of so-called friends is absolutely essential.
They are not friends. It is indirect bullying and not to be tolerated. Silly women getting pleasure out of demeaning others can not be thought of in any other way.
My feeling would be to walk away and find greener pastures. They are no loss.
 

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