[James Gutierrez]

AIBU 14.06.2024​

AIBU, which stands for 'Am I Being Unreasonable', is the perfect platform for sharing your thoughts and opinions! So, for today's AIBU discussion, we have this story from Reddit/WorriedRedPickle:

Am I being unreasonable for denying a woman a seat next to me on the bus?

I ride a pretty sparsely ridden bus from my work to my college. When I say sparse, I mean it’s never even close to half-full. There are always rows of empty seats at the time that I ride it in the afternoon.

I use a light linen bag for work, and I don’t want to put it on the floor or on my lap, so I put it on the seat next to me (all the seats are pairs, two seats next to each other). I don’t mind anyone sitting next to me, but the bus is never close to full, so I use the space for my bag.

Yesterday, during my commute, a lady got on the bus and grimaced at me. She gestured for me to remove my bag so she could sit next to me. As usual, there were so many empty seats. I wasn’t sitting in a disabled/reserved area — there were seats closer to the door. But whatever, I’m not confrontational; I removed my bag so she could sit.

I sort of rolled my eyes when she sat down next to me and sighed. Not to be obvious, but just because I got off an 8-hour shift, I was tired and wanted my own space, and SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO SIT NEXT TO ME. She clearly noticed—she then said, 'You need to learn some manners.'

After that, I got up and moved to another seat, but the whole thing had been bothering me for a day. Did I really lack manners? It just feels like she sat there to teach me a lesson when she could’ve sat anywhere else…

We're eager to hear your perspectives, members! Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.

 

[wavery]

No, you did not lack manners. Some people are a bit "uppity" and think that they can say whatever they like, particularly to younger people. Generally they have a demeanour of superiority and self importance and, delight in taking almost "anything" out on people just to make themselves feel better. You did the right thing, holding the urge to say something back to such a rude person. Moving seats, as you did, was the perfect thing to do to that person and, would have (just maybe) made her question her remarks to you.
I'm an older male in my 80's. Chin - chin, chin up and carry on. Wayne.

 

[Dogsbody]

If there weren't any vacant seats I would have asked you to move your bag.
That wasn't the case though.
Think she was being a bit of a todger..

 

[APapaz]

She was just being a bitch!!

 

[what]

NO you don't lack manners. BUT she certainly does!!!! What a B...H!

 

[Nozmo]

No you don’t lack manners, the other woman does.

 

[Juliebarnes53]

I hate it when that happens to me too. When there’s plenty of empty seats on the bus I have to wonder why people do it. They can sit anywhere in the bus after all. I think here they both need to think about that bus trip

 

[Littleboy8]

I wouldn’t have moved my bag if there were other seats vacant what a cow she was.

 

[marni]

If you didn’t want to be confrontational I think I would have stood up when she asked me to move my bag and moved to an empty seat further away. She didn’t deserve to sit next to you

 

[Jest]

i would do the same. out of my space please.

 

[Luckyus]

If don't sit next to someone, it saves me the trouble of speaking to them.

 

[Littleboy8]

If there weren't any vacant seats I would have asked you to move your bag.
That wasn't the case though.
Think she was being a bit of a todger..

I just looked up “todger” because I have no idea what it is,it said it’s a “penis” so wtf would you call her a penis

 

[Frustrated]

Unusual behaviour when there were plenty of seats elsewhere.

 

[Johan van Zalen]

I wouldn't have moved my bag for that bitch and she wouldn't like my response to her attitude

 

[Khate]

Not a nice person at all. Make sure you sit next to her even if it means moving your place, then sit so you are sitting in her lap .... Bitch that she is

 

[Ezzy]

Perhaps you were sitting on the seat where she would normally sit when taking the bus at any time.

Her action is still inexcusable. I am sure she had no desire to speak to you.

You were perfectly within your rights with your action.

 

[Vidbri1953]

I often sit in the older person/disabled seat as I have a disability that is not noticeable until I stand up. I am also a senior person. A lady gets on the bus one stop after I do and one day she asked me if I am senior. I said yes and her response was “you don’t look it, you don’t have grey hair.” I burst out laughing. I obviously was sitting in the seat she wanted. She has asked others too if they were a senior because if not “you are sitting in a seat reserved for older people.” Lots of empty seats on the bus too. I call her the Bus Seat Police.

 

[Littleboy8]

I often sit in the older person/disabled seat as I have a disability that is not noticeable until I stand up. I am also a senior person. A lady gets on the bus one stop after I do and one day she asked me if I am senior. I said yes and her response was “you don’t look it, you don’t have grey hair.” I burst out laughing. I obviously was sitting in the seat she wanted. She has asked others too if they were a senior because if not “you are sitting in a seat reserved for older people.” Lots of empty seats on the bus too. I call her the Bus Seat Police.

I haven’t caught a in donkeys years and I probably wouldn’t be able to get up the stairs these days.