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Athena E.

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AIBU 09.09.2024

AIBU, which stands for 'Am I Being Unreasonable', is the perfect platform for sharing your thoughts and opinions! So, for today's AIBU discussion, we have this story from Reddit/Feeling-Savings-1462:

Am I unreasonable for not using my inheritance (from my parents) for my husband’s family?

'My husband (52) and I (50) have been married for 31 years. We bought his parents' farm years ago, paid off the mortgage, and built our forever home there. We also raise cattle.'

'His family is always asking for help, especially his sisters and nephews. Years ago, we cared for his parents and his sister with Down’s syndrome when no one else would step up. We had young kids at the time, but we felt we had no choice—otherwise, the state would’ve stepped in. In my family, you take care of your family, so we took them in and never looked back.'

'However, I think his family resented us for this and somehow feels like they are owed something because we now own the family farm. And for some reason, my husband thinks he has to take care of his other sisters even though there is nothing wrong with them.'



'I recently inherited a decent amount of money from my parents. My husband doesn’t know exactly how much, and he’s upset I won’t tell him. He doesn’t have access to the account. But he wants me to use it to build a house on the farm for his sisters, so they don’t have to pay rent anymore. He even wants us to cover their property taxes and insurance, though they’d pay for utilities. He doesn’t want to charge them rent.'

'Why should I use my parents' hard-earned money they passed on to me so that my husband’s lazy sisters can sit in a brand new house on their family’s farm and never have to pay property tax or insurance or rent? I feel like this is my money, and I shouldn’t have to spend it on his family.'

'I want to put the majority of it in trust funds to our two children so I can pass it on to them. And to be honest, I am seriously thinking about just taking my inheritance and getting a divorce and living happily ever after. Do you think I was being unreasonable?'
 
Unfortunately. All those saying run, in a divorce the husband is entitled to 50% in Australia. Lose/lose situation. Place the money in a fund for the children, choose a good solicitor or accountant before you decide to sign any papers. You will be eligible for your share of the family farm - they can put that in their poor and smoke it
 
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