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I'll be honest they would have worn it!!

Simpering

Forth

OCCIDENTAL

A LITTLE LIGHT READING TO WHILE AWAY AN EVENING Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll? Ken came in another box. How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? He forgot to wrap his Whopper. My wife asked me to spoon in bed, but I’d rather fork. What’s the difference between peanut...

Matilda

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy, so I said, "I want a second opinion." He said, "Okay, you're ugly too."

What's the difference between a political party room and a porcupine? The political room has pricks on the inside!

So, a thought crossed a politicians mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.

A guy is sitting at a bar, and a drunk dude walks up to him, calling his mom a whore. The first guy just ignores it and stays in his spot drinking his beer. An hour goes by and the drunk dude comes back saying, "Your mom is a whore!" The first guy looks around the bar, sees people staring and...

Well, they do say opposites attract. So I sincerely hope you meet somebody who is attractive, honest, intelligent, and cultured.

You're lucky mirrors don't talk, or laugh for that matter.

Tony: "Were you born on the highway?" Jim: "Uh no, why?" Tony: "Because that's where most accidents happen."

I hear you are very kind to animals, so please give that face back to the gorilla.

I hear you are very kind to animals, so please give that face back to the gorilla.

A certain cretin politician has got his head so far up his arse he can chew his food twice

A man asks a woman, "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" The woman responds, "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

A man siting at a bar asked a pretty woman sitting next to him, Excuse me, but can I smell your pussy?" "Get away from me, you pervert," she replied. "Oh, I'm sorry," exclaims the man, "It must be your feet."