AIBU, which stands for 'Am I Being Unreasonable', is the perfect platform for sharing your thoughts and opinions! So, for today's AIBU discussion, we have this story from Reddit/Cold_Day_352:

'I(30F) have had this holiday planned since I was in middle school.

It centres around a movie/book series I am in love with, and I am a massive fan. I have a holiday booked to see the filming locations, I’m staying in some of the filming locations, and I have a strict itinerary.

This has been a dream of mine forever and I am unwilling to compromise on a single instance of it. It sounds crazy but I had a rough home life, this series was my escape, now I have adult money and I will see this to fruition.


My partner (M30) wants to come along and is willing to pay for anything he also wants to do.

I love him, he’s great, I’d be happy for him to come along. However he does not like this series, it wouldn’t be fun for him, and he wants to add some national parks and other things to the trip. But that would mess with my time sensitive itinerary since its planned for every day exactly.

I told him if he comes along everything he wants to do is on his own time, as my itinerary is what I am sticking to exactly.

I have this week planned to the minute and will regret if I miss a single thing. He’s upset because he feels this defeats the point of him coming along, he wants to spend that time with me, and he’s worried about me flying solo as a woman across the country.


He wants to be there in case the rental car breaks down, or something happens so I’m not anxious and alone trying to problem solve.

I get those concerns, I think they’re valid and his desire to support me is very sweet. There would be a 4-hour time difference between us if something happened which is another concern of his.

He feels I’m being very concrete on this and is frustrated by my lack of willingness to budge on it.

I told him its no different than if he wanted to go to New Zealand to see the Lord of the Rings (LOTR) stuff and I tried to plan other non-LOTR things on those days where he was wanting to visit hobbitville or whatever the shire village is called.


I told him if he wants to come he can either do his own thing, follow my itinerary, or just not come at all. I told him honestly I want to go alone. I want to go on this trip because I want to be with someone who I know who will appreciate it as much as I will, which is me.

Now he’s upset because he feels like I’m not seeing the big picture and don’t want to spend that time together.'

Would she be unreasonable if she did not let her partner go on the trip with her?