Seasoned critic dishes take on modern manners: Tastefully breaking bread or overdone?

In a world where dining etiquette can often seem as complex as a full-course meal, it's refreshing to hear a seasoned restaurant critic's take on what truly matters at the dinner table.

Many have seen table manners evolve over the years, and it's always intriguing to learn which customs stand the test of time and which ones are ready to be retired with the fondue set.


Sudi Pigott, a food and restaurant journalist with three decades of experience, shared his unique perspective on dining decorum.

While some may clutch their pearls at the thought of using fingers to mop up sauce, Pigott embraces this tactile approach to dining with gusto.

She's not alone in her thinking; a recent study suggested that many traditional table manners are now considered outdated, particularly among younger generations.

However, before you start thinking that anything goes at the dinner table, let's dive into Pigott's modern manners guide and see how it aligns with the sensibilities of our over-60s community.


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Restaurant critic Sudi Pigott shared her opinion on table manners, which can be ignored, and which should be embraced today. Credits: Instagram / Sudi Pigott


Firstly, Pigott champions the practical over the prim, suggesting that a napkin tucked into one's top is far more effective than one laid across the lap.

After all, who among us hasn't experienced the dreaded drop of bolognese on a crisp white blouse?

While it may not be the epitome of elegance, protecting your clothing from spills is certainly a priority worth considering.


When it comes to eating with your hands, even in restaurants, Pigott admitted to using her little finger to enjoy every last drop of a delicious sauce discreetly.

While this may raise eyebrows in some circles, she argues it's a sincere compliment to the chef's skills.

‘I do use my fingers far more than strictly necessary—and perhaps acceptable,’ she said.

‘I would even pick up a particularly succulent chicken leg in a posh dining room, to the horror of my partner, and encourage others to tuck in equally gleefully.’


Pigott also encouraged diners to let go of stuffy rituals, such as the rule that dictates passing food only to the right.

In her view, such formalities are unnecessary and can even disrupt the flow of a meal.

‘While I believe all the practices previously mentioned are acceptable—and can be embraced in even the most rarefied social settings—if you are guilty of the following, then you will reveal yourself to be uncouth and uncultured, as well as lacking basic manners, and at risk of never being invited back,’ she warned.


However, there are certain manners that Pigott insisted on maintaining.

Knowing how to properly serve cheese, for instance, is a must.

Cutting the nose off the brie is a faux pas that can leave a lasting impression, as Pigott learned the hard way during a lunch with her former in-laws.

Other non-negotiables include not waving cutlery around while talking, staying seated during the meal, and refraining from double-dipping in shared dishes.

According to her, these actions not only show respect for your fellow diners but also demonstrate a level of sophistication that transcends generational trends.

Timing is also crucial as per Pigott.

She said that diving into your meal before others have been served, or clearing plates too soon, can disrupt the dining experience and make guests feel rushed.

And while technology has become an integral part of our lives, Pigott stressed the importance of putting your dining companions before your phone—a rule that resonates with many of us who value face-to-face interaction.


As we explore the intricacies of dining etiquette and table manners, it's fascinating to consider the diverse perspectives on proper dining behaviour.

Some unconventional approaches that have now been accepted prompt us to question the boundaries of acceptable behaviour at the dining table and the role of etiquette in modern society.

Meanwhile, insights from a former royal butler offer a glimpse into the world of refined hospitality, where treating guests with the utmost care and attention is paramount.

By juxtaposing these contrasting viewpoints, we can gain a richer understanding of the nuances of etiquette and hospitality in different contexts.
Key Takeaways
  • Sudi Pigott, a restaurant critic, shared unconventional opinions on modern table manners and believed some could be ignored while others should be embraced.
  • Despite breaking some dining etiquette, such as using fingers to mop up the sauce, there are certain manners Pigott views as necessary, like understanding cheese etiquette and not waving cutlery around.
  • A study suggested that traditional table manners are considered irrelevant by many, particularly among younger generations.
  • According to Pigott, proper conduct at the table reflects on a person's social skills, and ignoring basic manners can lead to being perceived negatively in social contexts.
What table manners do you hold dear, and which ones do you think are ready to be retired? Share your thoughts and dining experiences with us in the comments below.
 
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My husband loves to use his fingers to lap up the last bit of sauce on the plate - he does this while I'm not looking maybe I will have to change my way of thinking. Mind your things have certainly changed in the many years we have been married, he no longer puts tomato sauce on Spag Bol or a beautiful, corned silverside with all the trimmings.
 
Interesting to read the dictates of someone who ought to know better, pontificating on which manners to ditch. With slack attitudes like hers, it is no wonder that society has gone to the dogs.
 
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Yeah.... we had no restaurants or take away.
You had to sit at the table and not leave until the last person was finished.
Your elbows were cracked with a tablespoon if you put your embows on the table.
You were looked down upon as 'lower class' if you were caught eating outside.
Was this in Australia or another country?
 
these days as we go out in larger groups, if you waited until everyone was served you would have a cold meal. I love the chatter and laughter whilst dining and do not look down on those that may enjoy their meal to the extend that they clean their plate (hopefully with decorum). The one thing I will not excuse is double dipping.
 
Yeah.... we had no restaurants or take away.
You had to sit at the table and not leave until the last person was finished.
Your elbows were cracked with a tablespoon if you put your embows on the table.
You were looked down upon as 'lower class' if you were caught eating outside.
We weren't allowed to leave the table without saying "excuse me" and definitely no elbows on the table. Did you ever go on picnics?
 
Before thinking you're setting aside traditional table manners it helps to know what you're talking about. For example, picking up chicken legs in one's fingers has been acceptable for hundreds of years, and at least in most European countries it is quite acceptable to use bread to mop up a delicious sauce.
This introduces the concept of where you are having a bearing. Never having dined with royalty ( which doesn't include third cousin twice removed, only the top half dozen) I don't know whether the two points above are acceptable at that level. One obvious point up there in the stratosphere is that you don't start before the king or queen.
 
One I wish people would still tell their children to do is not just leave the table & run around annoying other people. We were taught to say “please may I leave the table. Children can be so noisy when you are trying to have a nice quiet Dinner. Rather fed up with it.
 
i abhor men who wear a cap while dining. pig ignorant. my manners came from boarding school and are still firm in my mind. No need to be a pig at the table. ALSO how about parents teaching their kids to sit at the table and not run around.
 
Sudi Pigott, a food and restaurant journalist with three decades of experience, shared his unique perspective on dining decorum.

Two paragraphs later....

She's not alone in her thinking; a recent study suggested that many traditional table manners are now considered outdated, particularly among younger generations.

A mighty quick sex change in my view....
 
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Hubby being Greek and my sons follow , they always use their fingers to gather food and sauces up with their fingers.

Oh I sometimes way my fork around while talking while eating.

My rules are to sit and eat at the table and that everyone try to get home in time. I live the talk at the dinner table to find out how everyone's day went. Sometimes this is the only time of day we are all together
 

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