[mOiOz]

WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
These insults are from an era before the English language
got boiled down to 4-letter words.
Insults then, had some class!

• "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play;
  Bring a friend, if you have one."
  - George Bernard Shaw
  "Cannot possibly attend first night, I will attend the second,
  If there is one."
  - Winston Churchill
• A member of Parliament to Draeli:
  "Sir, you will either die on the gallows, or of some
  unspeakable disease."
  - Walter Kerr
  "That depends, Sir, whether I embrace your policies or
  your mistress."
  - Benjamin Disraeli
  "He has delusions of adequacy."
  - Walter Kerr
• "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries
  with great pleasure."
  - Clarence Darrow
• "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary
  - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
• "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it.
  - Moses Hadas
• "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I
  approved of it."
  - Mark Twain
  
• "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
  - Oscar Wilde
• "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having
  you here."
  - Stephen Bishop
• "He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
  - John Bright
• "I've just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing
  trivial.”
  - Irvin S. Cobb
  
  
  
• "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in
  others."
  - Samuel Johnson
• "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.
  - Paul Keating
• "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always
  yielded easily."
  - Charles, Count Talleyrand
  
• "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.
  - Forrest Tucker
  
  
• "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without
  any address on it?"
  - Mark Twain
  
• "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the
  stork."
  - Mae West
• "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others
  whenever they go.
  - Oscar Wilde
• "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts
  for support rather than illumination.”
  - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
• "He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
  - Billy Wilder
• "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this
  wasn't it."
  - Groucho Marx
• "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices
  I admire."
  - Winston Churchill

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