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PENIS TAX
SCREW (Services Creating Recreation, Entertainment & Work). announced today that a new Tax would apply to the penis, as it provides a service.
• The way the tax will apply was difficult to decide. This was
due to the fact 40 percent of the time it is hanging around
unemployed, 30 percent of the time it is hard up, 20 percent
of the time it is pissed off and 10 percent of the time it is in a
hole
• On top of that it has two dependants and they are both nuts
• Effective 1st April 2018, a penis will be taxed according to
size:
○ 10"-12” - Luxury Tax
○ 8"-10” - Pole Tax
○ 5"-8” - Privilege Tax
○ 4"-5” - Nuisance Tax
○ Males exceeding 12” must file under capital gains
○ Anyone under 4” is eligible for a refund
(Please do not ask for an extension)
SCREW is still awaiting clarification of questions raised regarding this new tax, including:
- Are there penalties for early withdrawal?
- What if one’s penis is self-employed?
- Do multiple partners count as a corporation?
- Are condoms deductible as work clothes?
RECENT AMENDMENTS & ADDITIONS
a) Condoms will be deductible as compulsory work safety gear
b) Medically approved use of Viagra will receive a Disability
Pension.
c) Use of penis head in lieu of brain will be regarded as fraud.
d) Lay-by and monthly deposits will be arranged.
SCREW (Services Creating Recreation, Entertainment & Work). announced today that a new Tax would apply to the penis, as it provides a service.
• The way the tax will apply was difficult to decide. This was
due to the fact 40 percent of the time it is hanging around
unemployed, 30 percent of the time it is hard up, 20 percent
of the time it is pissed off and 10 percent of the time it is in a
hole
• On top of that it has two dependants and they are both nuts
• Effective 1st April 2018, a penis will be taxed according to
size:
○ 10"-12” - Luxury Tax
○ 8"-10” - Pole Tax
○ 5"-8” - Privilege Tax
○ 4"-5” - Nuisance Tax
○ Males exceeding 12” must file under capital gains
○ Anyone under 4” is eligible for a refund
(Please do not ask for an extension)
SCREW is still awaiting clarification of questions raised regarding this new tax, including:
- Are there penalties for early withdrawal?
- What if one’s penis is self-employed?
- Do multiple partners count as a corporation?
- Are condoms deductible as work clothes?
RECENT AMENDMENTS & ADDITIONS
a) Condoms will be deductible as compulsory work safety gear
b) Medically approved use of Viagra will receive a Disability
Pension.
c) Use of penis head in lieu of brain will be regarded as fraud.
d) Lay-by and monthly deposits will be arranged.
