[Skipton]

Mixing It Up!​

The bartender makes a drink and slides it down the bar.
The doctor takes a sip and loves it. "Whoa, that's great. What's your secret?" he said.
"A little bit of almond extract. Gives it a little something extra." the bartender replied.
The two hit it off and a lifelong friendship develops.
One night the doctor enters and like clockwork, the bartender goes to make his
favourite drink only to realise that all the almond extract is gone.
Thinking on his feet he substitutes it with a little hickory on hand.
The doctor takes a sip. A little confused, he takes another.
"Is this an almond daiquiri, Dick?"
“No, it's a hickory daiquiri, Doc."

 

[Dennis]

Dennis R's Morning Pun. Knock-Knock Who's there? Debate Debate who? Debate goes on de hook if you want to catch de fish.

 

[Luckyus]

Hickory Dickory Dock.
The mouse Ran up the clock.
The clock struck one.
The mouse ran down.
It's bum was brown.
And so was the cuckoo's c--k?

Make of it what you will!!

 

[Littleboy8]

Hickory Dickory Dock.
The mouse Ran up the clock.
The clock struck one.
The mouse ran down.
It's bum was brown.
And so was the cuckoo's c--k?

Make of it what you will!!

good one

 

[Catherines]

Hickory Dickory Dock.
The mouse Ran up the clock.
The clock struck one.
The mouse ran down.
It's bum was brown.
And so was the cuckoo's c--k?

Make of it what you will!!

Keep it clean on here please.

 

[Littleboy8]

Keep it clean on here please.

Yeah righto mum

 

[Catherines]

Yeah righto mum

It’s not a case of ‘righto mum’ Littleboy8. My husband and I often have/enjoy a naughty joke but it is always in private. We never do so on social media or when in company.

 

[MIZMAC]

It’s not a case of ‘righto mum’ Littleboy8. My husband and I often have/enjoy a naughty joke but it is always in private. We never do so on social media or when in company.

You are hypocrites.

 

[Littleboy8]

It’s not a case of ‘righto mum’ Littleboy8. My husband and I often have/enjoy a naughty joke but it is always in private. We never do so on social media or when in company.

Okay don’t get your knickers in a knot or hubby will have to undo them with his teethjoking righto mum.

 

[BeautifulMousey]

Okay don’t get your knickers in a knot or hubby will have to undo them with his teethjoking righto mum.

 

[Barbara V]

Didn't find joke funny,but the comments were. I've got not complaint if comments are a bit risque

 

[midgemills]

Keep it clean on here please.

Cleaner version:
Hickory dickory dock
The mouse ran up the clock
The clock struck one
And killed the mouse.

(our schoolyard version)

 

[midgemills]

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Had scrambled eggs for breakfast.

(another fractured fairy tale from the schoolyard.)

Over to you Dennis.

 

[Catherines]

You are hypocrites.

Not a hypocrite, I did say my husband and I do occasionally share such jokes but we do not put it out there. Doesn’t make the Australian name a very good one when used in everyday speech in public; just asking that crude and risqué jokes be kept to yourselves.

It has become so commonplace to hear crude jokes and vulgarity out of the mouths of very young children these days because they hear their parents using it everyday and sometimes at a very, very early age without knowing what it means.

Just listen to so-called comedians’ language - every second word seems to start with the four-letter ‘f’ word. I don’t think that’s funny, but it seems to be so to the so-called comedian all of whom I would not pay a cent to sit and watch.

 

[Luckyus]

Keep it clean on here please.

You have a dirty mind?

 

[Littleboy8]

You have a dirty mind?

 

[havingadoggyday]

 

[Luckyus]

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Had scrambled eggs for breakfast.

(another fractured fairy tale from the schoolyard.)

Over to you Dennis.

In the garden of Eden lay Adam.
Complacently stroking his madam.
And loud was his mirth.
For on all of the earth.
There were only two balls-and he had 'em.

 

[Littleboy8]

In the garden of Eden lay Adam.
Complacently stroking his madam.
And loud was his mirth.
For on all of the earth.
There were only two balls-and he had 'em.

 

[BeautifulMousey]