Love in Later Life: Navigating New Romance, Scams and the Money Talk After 60
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Love can strike at any age, and for a growing number of Australians in their 60s and beyond, the dating scene is offering a second (or third) chance at companionship and romance. It’s an exciting trend – finding laughter, love and intimacy later in life – but it also comes with unique challenges. From changing social norms to the rise of dating apps and the lurking threat of scams, older daters are being urged to balance their hearts and their wallets. In an era where many over-60s are swiping right and starting new chapters, experts say a dose of pragmatism and open conversation about money can go a long way.
In this article, we’ll explore the joys of dating in your golden years as well as the financial pitfalls to watch out for. Along the way, we’ll tap into advice from Australian experts and share real-life insights. Whether you’re 65 and downloading your first dating app, or 75 and wondering how to protect your nest egg when a new partner comes along, read on. Love in later life can be both heartwarming and hazardous, but a bit of savvy can help ensure your new relationship brings happiness without heartbreak.
Falling in love isn’t just for the young – and in fact, finding a companion later in life can be incredibly rewarding. Many seniors describe new romances as a renaissance of joy and purpose. Take Jean Whittle from Wollongong, for example. At 89, Jean met her partner Martin while waiting for a bus, and soon discovered “it’s the happiest time of my life,” she said. Stories like Jean’s highlight the emotional richness that a late-life relationship can bring: the thrill of companionship, daily conversation, shared activities, and yes, even a loving kiss at the bus stop.
Beyond the butterflies, there’s a practical upside to pairing up in our older years. Social connection is crucial for health and happiness. “Because people are living longer it’s meaning relationships are critical and pivotal to people’s mental health, wellbeing and connection,” says Andrew King of Relationships Australia. Research backs this up. Embarking on a relationship later in life has proven health benefits – reducing feelings of isolation and even improving physical health.
More social connections in the later years can lower blood pressure, reduce obesity and even delay the onset of dementia by a third, King notes. In his words, a loving partnership provides “companionship, friendship, shared mutual activities and an ongoing experience of a sexual life” – all factors that keep us engaged and thriving. Some studies suggest that being in a relationship can add 10 to 12 years to your life. That’s a remarkable bonus for the heart and the body.
It’s no wonder that more older Australians are seeking love. As life expectancy climbs – an Australian woman aged 65 today can expect to live to 87, and a man to 85 on average– there are plenty of years for a fulfilling relationship beyond the traditional “til death do us part” of a first marriage. Many seniors say they simply don’t want to spend their 70s or 80s alone. Companionship combats loneliness, gives structure to the day, and provides someone to share life’s little moments – from morning tea to doctor visits. “In a relationship you’ve always got someone on your team,” one retiree explained, “and that just makes everything a bit brighter.”
Importantly, the stigma around dating in later life is fading. Just a generation or two ago, an older widow or widower might have been expected to stay solo. Today, attitudes have shifted – even popular culture has caught on. The message is clear: finding love is nothing to be ashamed of at any age. “You don't have to stop finding love at a certain age,” stresses psychologist Sharon Draper, who works with dating site eHarmony. She says her baby boomer clients are proof that everybody wants to find somebody compatible and share their life, no matter if they’re 25 or 75. This positive encouragement is a far cry from the past, and it’s empowering many seniors to give romance another go.
It’s not just attitudes that have changed – the whole dating landscape looks very different for today’s over-60 daters. For one thing, there are simply more single seniors now, due to life events and demographic shifts. Australians are not only marrying later but also divorcing later in life. In 2024, the average age at divorce was about 47 for men and 44 for women.
With nearly 49,000 divorces recorded last year, many Australians in mid-life find themselves back on the singles scene with a lot of life experience (and perhaps grown children and a mortgage) in tow. Add to that the fact that people are living longer and often outliving spouses, and you have a substantial community of folks in their 60s, 70s and beyond who are looking for a companion for their golden years.
Socially, it’s now much more acceptable – even common – for older people to date, form new relationships, or remarry. Retirement villages report blossoming romances among residents; one NSW retirement village manager observed that social activities like group dinners and walks have led to dozens of elderly couples finding love on-site. “As you get older it doesn’t stop love,” she pointed out – seniors just need environments that support socializing and connection. Communities are slowly adapting to this reality. (In fact, as Mr King from Relationships Australia quipped, even aged care facilities may need to consider things like double bedrooms for couples in the future.)
Another major change in the dating game is technology. The rise of online dating and apps has opened up a world of possibilities for finding love – and older Australians are increasingly logging on. A decade ago, a newly single 60-something might have been limited to meeting people through friends or community events. Today, with a smartphone or laptop, they can browse profiles on apps like Tinder, Bumble, RSVP or specialized senior dating sites.
Elizabeth Terzon, 65, recalls that when she divorced 15 years ago, “few people her age were on dating apps.” Now, she says the stigma is fading and baby boomers are giving online dating a try. The appeal is obvious: “It gives you a chance to browse, to check, to have a look around much wider than if you just go to a pub,” she says of dating apps. Instead of relying on sheer luck to meet someone locally, older singles can connect with potential partners who share their interests, values and life stage – even if they live suburbs or states apart.
Statistics bear out the trend: The over-55 age bracket is one of the fastest-growing segments in online dating. In fact, industry research predicts baby boomers will be a main growth driver for dating services in the coming years. Dave Heysen, head of Australia’s dating site RSVP, noted that over-55s have become the platform’s biggest growth area recently. The 40-plus crowd already makes up the bulk of their users, and more people in their 50s, 60s and 70s are signing up for serious connections. Other apps report similar patterns: even youth-oriented brands like Tinder and Hinge say they’re now seeing more middle-aged and senior users than ever.
Older daters often approach these apps a bit differently than younger generations do. For one, many aren’t looking for casual flings (“I’m not looking for anything casual,” one 70-year-old online dater laughed. “But if George Clooney comes along, I’ll make an exception!”).
Jokes aside, there’s evidence that those in their 50s and 60s are generally seeking serious, meaningful relationships rather than quick hookups. “The younger generation are open to exploring, seeing who’s out there, experimenting more,” says Sharon Draper. “The baby boomers tend to want to meet somebody with similar values… someone that’s going to help them have a loving relationship that’s more sustainable”. In other words, compatibility and companionship trump adrenaline and adventure for most senior singles – which makes sense when you’ve already had a lifetime of adventures and just want a partner to enjoy the everyday moments with.
That said, diving into digital dating at 65 can be daunting. Many seniors describe feeling out of their comfort zone with technology and the unspoken “rules” of online dating. Swiping, texting, dealing with profile pics – it can feel like learning a new language. There’s also the challenge of online etiquette and safety (more on safety soon). But take heart: plenty of older Australians have mastered it, often with a bit of humor and help.
Some tips from the experts include: keep an open mind and a sense of humour (dates in your 60s can be awkward too – laugh it off!); be honest in your profile (nearly 98% of older Aussies say they’re upfront about their age online and that honesty builds trust); and know what you want. “What you’re looking for in later life will be different to what you wanted when younger,” advises Annie Gurton, a 72-year-old counsellor who found love online herself. It’s important to list your “non-negotiables” and deal-breakers – whether it’s a shared hobby or simply the desire to live in separate houses – and communicate them clearly.
Perhaps most importantly: don’t be intimidated by the process. Confidence is key, even if you feel like a fish out of water on an app. “Back yourself,” as one guide from Australian Seniors Insurance encouraged readers – remember that you are a unique person with a lot to offer, and it’s never too late for new friendships or romance. Try to enjoy the journey, funny stories and all. As older generations embrace digital dating, they’re also redefining what romance looks like in later life – and proving you can teach an old dog new tricks when it comes to love.
Source: Australian Seniors / YouTube
These nest eggs provide security in retirement, but they can also complicate new relationships. As NGS Super financial planner Trudy Jenkin notes, unlike young couples who might be saving for their first home together, people coming together later in life often bring substantial financial baggage to the table. And that means the stakes are higher if things go wrong.
“People who come together later in life are a lot more pragmatic about these things, in terms of financial issues,” Jenkin says. After all, older couples generally aren’t combining finances to raise young kids or pay off a starter mortgage. Their goals – and risks – are different. For example, one big concern is protecting your family and your future. Many seniors who start a new relationship worry about how it might affect their adult children’s inheritance. “They really want to protect their adult kids more than perhaps a generation ago,” Jenkin explains.
With property prices sky-high and younger Aussies struggling to buy homes, today’s parents often intend for their estate to help their kids someday. A new partner can inadvertently upset those plans if things aren’t handled carefully. Without clear agreements, assets could end up in places you didn’t intend, or worse – spark family disputes later on. No one wants a scenario where a second spouse and kids from the first marriage end up in a legal battle.
Money can be a touchy subject in any romance, let alone later in life when finances are more complex. It’s tempting to avoid the topic for fear of seeming unromantic or distrusting. But experts say that “money talk” is one conversation you can’t afford to avoid.
“Let’s be honest: talking about money with a new partner can feel awkward,” Jenkin acknowledges. No one wants to jinx a budding romance by bringing up the ‘what-ifs’. Yet, as she wisely puts it, “If you get it done, put it in the bottom drawer, then there’s no grey areas”. In other words, have the discussion, make the necessary plans, then you can tuck it away and get on with enjoying life together. Addressing key financial questions early can actually strengthen your relationship, Jenkin says. It builds trust and ensures you’re on the same page. On the flip side, burying your head in the sand can lead to grief down the track if surprises or misunderstandings crop up.
So what exactly should older daters talk about when it comes to money? Here are a few topics and tips experts recommend hashing out with your new love:
Taking these steps may feel uncomfortable at first, but it can save a lot of heartache (and legal fees) down the road. It’s about being prepared, not pessimistic. As Jenkin points out, many new couples get so caught up in the bliss of late-life love that they overlook critical financial considerations, which can lead to serious problems later. No one likes to imagine a breakup or dispute, but with roughly one in two marriages ending in separation in Australia, the odds aren’t trivial. Better to have “the talk” now than a nasty surprise later. In the end, addressing finances upfront is an act of care – it protects you, your partner, and your family, allowing everyone to feel more secure as you build a life together.
Of course, not every “date” who shows interest in a senior is genuine. Romance scams have exploded in recent years, and unfortunately, older Australians are frequently the targets. These scams often take place online – via dating websites, social media, or even email – and they can be devastating both financially and emotionally.
“People don’t just lose money. They suffer deep emotional trauma, thinking they’ve found love only to realise they are being swindled,” warns cyber safety expert Darren Halpin. It’s a cruel con: scammers exploit the loneliness or trusting nature of someone looking for companionship, and manipulate them into handing over money.
Here’s how it typically works. A scammer will create a fake identity – perhaps posing as an attractive widow, or a retired army officer, or just a very friendly stranger with a vague backstory. They will often steal photos or even use AI-generated images to build a convincing profile. Then, they trawl dating apps, Facebook, even the comments of online articles, to strike up conversations with potential victims.
Once they’ve hooked someone, they move fast: the online “relationship” progresses quickly, with the scammer showering the victim with affection, pet names and claims of destiny (“love bombing” is the term). They often try to pull the conversation off the public platform onto private messaging (WhatsApp, Viber, etc.) where it’s less regulated.
And inevitably, an “emergency” arises: the scammer starts asking for money. It might be framed as a short-term loan for a plane ticket to finally meet you, or help with a medical bill, or a business investment they want to share with you. They play on emotions and urgency – and if you send funds once, they’ll keep coming back with new excuses until the awful realization dawns or the money runs out.
The scale of this problem is alarming. Australians lost more than $23.6 million to romance scams in the past year alone, according to the ACCC’s Scamwatch. And a disproportionate amount of that money is coming out of the pockets of older people. In 2024, Aussies aged 55 and over reported losing more than $12 million – well over half of the nation’s total losses to romance scams.
Scammers deliberately target seniors because they suspect older folks might have more savings or assets (like that superannuation or home equity), and perhaps may be more trusting or unfamiliar with the tricks of online fraud. It’s a sad reality: while looking for love online can result in happy relationships for many, there are also serious risks involved.
So, how can you protect yourself without becoming too cynical to enjoy meeting someone new? The key is vigilance and a healthy dose of skepticism with anyone you haven’t met in person. Some red flags to watch out for include: a stranger professing love very quickly, before you’ve even met; someone who has endless excuses for why they can’t meet face-to-face or even video chat (they claim to be overseas, on an oil rig, caring for a sick relative – there’s always a reason); and of course, any request for money or financial information is a huge warning sign.
Never, ever send money or share bank details with someone you haven’t met in person – no matter how convincing their story or how kind they seem. Legitimate new friends or partners do not ask you to pay their bills or invest in their schemes, period.
It’s also wise to talk to family or friends about any new online romance. Often, an outside perspective can spot inconsistencies or suspect details that are hard to see when you’re in the emotional bubble of a budding relationship. Do some detective work too: perform a reverse image search of their profile picture, and ask plenty of questions. Scammers often slip up with contradictory answers and poor excuses because they’re juggling multiple victims. By staying alert to these tactics, you can enjoy the benefits of online dating while steering clear of the heartbreak (and financial ruin) a scam can cause.
If you’re unsure, remember that government resources like the ACCC’s Scamwatch website and the new National Anti-Scam Centre provide up-to-date alerts on current scammer ploys. Many banks also offer guidance, since they’ve seen an uptick in customers being tricked.
The bottom line: trust your gut. If something feels off about that charming stranger who always has a reason he can’t video chat – or whose life seems a bit too dramatic – step back and reconsider. It’s far better to miss out on a maybe-romance than to fall victim to a con that wipes out your savings.
As older Australians venture into the dating world, there’s a lot to celebrate. It takes courage to put yourself out there after a lifetime of experiences, and finding someone to hold hands with on the journey ahead is a beautiful thing. The emotional and health benefits of companionship are real – from boosting mental wellbeing to possibly even extending your life. Society is finally recognizing that love has no age limit, and more support and opportunities exist for seniors to mingle, whether through technology or community events. In many ways, it’s the best time in history to be dating in your 60s or 70s.
Yet, it’s equally important to go in with eyes wide open. This isn’t the carefree dating of our teens and twenties. We carry both the treasures and the trials of experience now – be it financial assets that need protecting, or the wisdom to know what we truly want in a partner. The financial pitfalls of later-life dating are not about scaring anyone off, but about empowering older daters to love safely and smartly. Have the hard conversations early, protect your independence, and don’t be shy to seek professional advice (think of a financial planner or lawyer as part of your support team, like a couples counsellor for your bank account!).
Likewise, staying alert to scams is just a modern necessity. It’s unfortunate that we must be a bit wary when seeking connection, but a few precautions can spare you unimaginable pain. Remember that genuine love will respect your boundaries and your security. Any relationship that pressures you into secrecy or financial compromise is not one you want.
At the end of the day, an old proverb comes to mind: “Trust in God, but tie up your camel.” In other words, go ahead and open your heart, but lock your wallet until you’re absolutely sure. Ask questions, enjoy the process, and take your time. Good people are out there, and many seniors do find deeply fulfilling relationships that enrich their autumn years.
So whether you’re downloading a dating app for the first time, striking up a flirtation at the bowling club, or rekindling a connection with an old friend – approach romance with optimism and a pinch of caution. The rewards can be tremendous, and a little foresight will help ensure your new love story is filled with happiness, not financial regret.
And finally, a question to ponder: As we embrace the prospect of love later in life – with all its emotional benefits and potential risks – how can we best balance protecting our hearts and our assets while diving into the next great adventure?
In this article, we’ll explore the joys of dating in your golden years as well as the financial pitfalls to watch out for. Along the way, we’ll tap into advice from Australian experts and share real-life insights. Whether you’re 65 and downloading your first dating app, or 75 and wondering how to protect your nest egg when a new partner comes along, read on. Love in later life can be both heartwarming and hazardous, but a bit of savvy can help ensure your new relationship brings happiness without heartbreak.
The Upside: Companionship, Connection and Health Benefits
Falling in love isn’t just for the young – and in fact, finding a companion later in life can be incredibly rewarding. Many seniors describe new romances as a renaissance of joy and purpose. Take Jean Whittle from Wollongong, for example. At 89, Jean met her partner Martin while waiting for a bus, and soon discovered “it’s the happiest time of my life,” she said. Stories like Jean’s highlight the emotional richness that a late-life relationship can bring: the thrill of companionship, daily conversation, shared activities, and yes, even a loving kiss at the bus stop.
Source: Seniors Discount Club
Beyond the butterflies, there’s a practical upside to pairing up in our older years. Social connection is crucial for health and happiness. “Because people are living longer it’s meaning relationships are critical and pivotal to people’s mental health, wellbeing and connection,” says Andrew King of Relationships Australia. Research backs this up. Embarking on a relationship later in life has proven health benefits – reducing feelings of isolation and even improving physical health.
More social connections in the later years can lower blood pressure, reduce obesity and even delay the onset of dementia by a third, King notes. In his words, a loving partnership provides “companionship, friendship, shared mutual activities and an ongoing experience of a sexual life” – all factors that keep us engaged and thriving. Some studies suggest that being in a relationship can add 10 to 12 years to your life. That’s a remarkable bonus for the heart and the body.
It’s no wonder that more older Australians are seeking love. As life expectancy climbs – an Australian woman aged 65 today can expect to live to 87, and a man to 85 on average– there are plenty of years for a fulfilling relationship beyond the traditional “til death do us part” of a first marriage. Many seniors say they simply don’t want to spend their 70s or 80s alone. Companionship combats loneliness, gives structure to the day, and provides someone to share life’s little moments – from morning tea to doctor visits. “In a relationship you’ve always got someone on your team,” one retiree explained, “and that just makes everything a bit brighter.”
Importantly, the stigma around dating in later life is fading. Just a generation or two ago, an older widow or widower might have been expected to stay solo. Today, attitudes have shifted – even popular culture has caught on. The message is clear: finding love is nothing to be ashamed of at any age. “You don't have to stop finding love at a certain age,” stresses psychologist Sharon Draper, who works with dating site eHarmony. She says her baby boomer clients are proof that everybody wants to find somebody compatible and share their life, no matter if they’re 25 or 75. This positive encouragement is a far cry from the past, and it’s empowering many seniors to give romance another go.
A New Dating Landscape for Older Aussies
Source: Seniors Discount Club
It’s not just attitudes that have changed – the whole dating landscape looks very different for today’s over-60 daters. For one thing, there are simply more single seniors now, due to life events and demographic shifts. Australians are not only marrying later but also divorcing later in life. In 2024, the average age at divorce was about 47 for men and 44 for women.
With nearly 49,000 divorces recorded last year, many Australians in mid-life find themselves back on the singles scene with a lot of life experience (and perhaps grown children and a mortgage) in tow. Add to that the fact that people are living longer and often outliving spouses, and you have a substantial community of folks in their 60s, 70s and beyond who are looking for a companion for their golden years.
Socially, it’s now much more acceptable – even common – for older people to date, form new relationships, or remarry. Retirement villages report blossoming romances among residents; one NSW retirement village manager observed that social activities like group dinners and walks have led to dozens of elderly couples finding love on-site. “As you get older it doesn’t stop love,” she pointed out – seniors just need environments that support socializing and connection. Communities are slowly adapting to this reality. (In fact, as Mr King from Relationships Australia quipped, even aged care facilities may need to consider things like double bedrooms for couples in the future.)
Another major change in the dating game is technology. The rise of online dating and apps has opened up a world of possibilities for finding love – and older Australians are increasingly logging on. A decade ago, a newly single 60-something might have been limited to meeting people through friends or community events. Today, with a smartphone or laptop, they can browse profiles on apps like Tinder, Bumble, RSVP or specialized senior dating sites.
Elizabeth Terzon, 65, recalls that when she divorced 15 years ago, “few people her age were on dating apps.” Now, she says the stigma is fading and baby boomers are giving online dating a try. The appeal is obvious: “It gives you a chance to browse, to check, to have a look around much wider than if you just go to a pub,” she says of dating apps. Instead of relying on sheer luck to meet someone locally, older singles can connect with potential partners who share their interests, values and life stage – even if they live suburbs or states apart.
Digital Dating: Silver Singles Swipe Right
Many over-60s are venturing onto dating apps – a new frontier that can widen the pool of potential partners.
Statistics bear out the trend: The over-55 age bracket is one of the fastest-growing segments in online dating. In fact, industry research predicts baby boomers will be a main growth driver for dating services in the coming years. Dave Heysen, head of Australia’s dating site RSVP, noted that over-55s have become the platform’s biggest growth area recently. The 40-plus crowd already makes up the bulk of their users, and more people in their 50s, 60s and 70s are signing up for serious connections. Other apps report similar patterns: even youth-oriented brands like Tinder and Hinge say they’re now seeing more middle-aged and senior users than ever.
Older daters often approach these apps a bit differently than younger generations do. For one, many aren’t looking for casual flings (“I’m not looking for anything casual,” one 70-year-old online dater laughed. “But if George Clooney comes along, I’ll make an exception!”).
Jokes aside, there’s evidence that those in their 50s and 60s are generally seeking serious, meaningful relationships rather than quick hookups. “The younger generation are open to exploring, seeing who’s out there, experimenting more,” says Sharon Draper. “The baby boomers tend to want to meet somebody with similar values… someone that’s going to help them have a loving relationship that’s more sustainable”. In other words, compatibility and companionship trump adrenaline and adventure for most senior singles – which makes sense when you’ve already had a lifetime of adventures and just want a partner to enjoy the everyday moments with.
That said, diving into digital dating at 65 can be daunting. Many seniors describe feeling out of their comfort zone with technology and the unspoken “rules” of online dating. Swiping, texting, dealing with profile pics – it can feel like learning a new language. There’s also the challenge of online etiquette and safety (more on safety soon). But take heart: plenty of older Australians have mastered it, often with a bit of humor and help.
Some tips from the experts include: keep an open mind and a sense of humour (dates in your 60s can be awkward too – laugh it off!); be honest in your profile (nearly 98% of older Aussies say they’re upfront about their age online and that honesty builds trust); and know what you want. “What you’re looking for in later life will be different to what you wanted when younger,” advises Annie Gurton, a 72-year-old counsellor who found love online herself. It’s important to list your “non-negotiables” and deal-breakers – whether it’s a shared hobby or simply the desire to live in separate houses – and communicate them clearly.
Perhaps most importantly: don’t be intimidated by the process. Confidence is key, even if you feel like a fish out of water on an app. “Back yourself,” as one guide from Australian Seniors Insurance encouraged readers – remember that you are a unique person with a lot to offer, and it’s never too late for new friendships or romance. Try to enjoy the journey, funny stories and all. As older generations embrace digital dating, they’re also redefining what romance looks like in later life – and proving you can teach an old dog new tricks when it comes to love.
Source: Australian Seniors / YouTube
When Hearts and Wallets Collide: Financial Pitfalls of Later-Life Dating
For all the warm and fuzzy aspects of finding love again, experts caution that older Aussies should keep an eye on their financial well-being when dating. By the time we reach our 50s, 60s or beyond, many of us have accumulated significant assets – a family home, decades of superannuation savings, perhaps an investment property or share portfolio.These nest eggs provide security in retirement, but they can also complicate new relationships. As NGS Super financial planner Trudy Jenkin notes, unlike young couples who might be saving for their first home together, people coming together later in life often bring substantial financial baggage to the table. And that means the stakes are higher if things go wrong.
“People who come together later in life are a lot more pragmatic about these things, in terms of financial issues,” Jenkin says. After all, older couples generally aren’t combining finances to raise young kids or pay off a starter mortgage. Their goals – and risks – are different. For example, one big concern is protecting your family and your future. Many seniors who start a new relationship worry about how it might affect their adult children’s inheritance. “They really want to protect their adult kids more than perhaps a generation ago,” Jenkin explains.
With property prices sky-high and younger Aussies struggling to buy homes, today’s parents often intend for their estate to help their kids someday. A new partner can inadvertently upset those plans if things aren’t handled carefully. Without clear agreements, assets could end up in places you didn’t intend, or worse – spark family disputes later on. No one wants a scenario where a second spouse and kids from the first marriage end up in a legal battle.
Money can be a touchy subject in any romance, let alone later in life when finances are more complex. It’s tempting to avoid the topic for fear of seeming unromantic or distrusting. But experts say that “money talk” is one conversation you can’t afford to avoid.
“Let’s be honest: talking about money with a new partner can feel awkward,” Jenkin acknowledges. No one wants to jinx a budding romance by bringing up the ‘what-ifs’. Yet, as she wisely puts it, “If you get it done, put it in the bottom drawer, then there’s no grey areas”. In other words, have the discussion, make the necessary plans, then you can tuck it away and get on with enjoying life together. Addressing key financial questions early can actually strengthen your relationship, Jenkin says. It builds trust and ensures you’re on the same page. On the flip side, burying your head in the sand can lead to grief down the track if surprises or misunderstandings crop up.
So what exactly should older daters talk about when it comes to money? Here are a few topics and tips experts recommend hashing out with your new love:
- Lay your cards on the table: Be upfront about your assets and liabilities – what you own and what you owe. Openness now prevents shocks later.
- Discuss retirement incomes: How will you handle superannuation, pensions or Centrelink benefits if you move in together or remarry? (Heads up: forming a couple can affect pension entitlements due to means testing, so it’s wise to know the rules.)
- Update your legal docs: Estate planning is crucial. Who are the beneficiaries in your will, super fund, or life insurance? If your circumstances change, update these to reflect your wishes.
- Consider a Financial Agreement: It’s not romantic, but a legally binding prenup or cohabitation agreement can protect both parties – especially if you have significant assets or promises to children. Think of it as an insurance policy: you hope never to need it, but it’s there just in case.
- Keep communicating: Finances aren’t a “set and forget” topic. Continue to check in with each other about money matters as your relationship evolves (for instance, if one of you needs costly medical care later, or if you decide to move house, etc.). Regular, honest communication is key.
Taking these steps may feel uncomfortable at first, but it can save a lot of heartache (and legal fees) down the road. It’s about being prepared, not pessimistic. As Jenkin points out, many new couples get so caught up in the bliss of late-life love that they overlook critical financial considerations, which can lead to serious problems later. No one likes to imagine a breakup or dispute, but with roughly one in two marriages ending in separation in Australia, the odds aren’t trivial. Better to have “the talk” now than a nasty surprise later. In the end, addressing finances upfront is an act of care – it protects you, your partner, and your family, allowing everyone to feel more secure as you build a life together.
Beware the Dark Side: Scams Targeting Older Romantics
Of course, not every “date” who shows interest in a senior is genuine. Romance scams have exploded in recent years, and unfortunately, older Australians are frequently the targets. These scams often take place online – via dating websites, social media, or even email – and they can be devastating both financially and emotionally.
“People don’t just lose money. They suffer deep emotional trauma, thinking they’ve found love only to realise they are being swindled,” warns cyber safety expert Darren Halpin. It’s a cruel con: scammers exploit the loneliness or trusting nature of someone looking for companionship, and manipulate them into handing over money.
Here’s how it typically works. A scammer will create a fake identity – perhaps posing as an attractive widow, or a retired army officer, or just a very friendly stranger with a vague backstory. They will often steal photos or even use AI-generated images to build a convincing profile. Then, they trawl dating apps, Facebook, even the comments of online articles, to strike up conversations with potential victims.
Once they’ve hooked someone, they move fast: the online “relationship” progresses quickly, with the scammer showering the victim with affection, pet names and claims of destiny (“love bombing” is the term). They often try to pull the conversation off the public platform onto private messaging (WhatsApp, Viber, etc.) where it’s less regulated.
And inevitably, an “emergency” arises: the scammer starts asking for money. It might be framed as a short-term loan for a plane ticket to finally meet you, or help with a medical bill, or a business investment they want to share with you. They play on emotions and urgency – and if you send funds once, they’ll keep coming back with new excuses until the awful realization dawns or the money runs out.
The scale of this problem is alarming. Australians lost more than $23.6 million to romance scams in the past year alone, according to the ACCC’s Scamwatch. And a disproportionate amount of that money is coming out of the pockets of older people. In 2024, Aussies aged 55 and over reported losing more than $12 million – well over half of the nation’s total losses to romance scams.
Scammers deliberately target seniors because they suspect older folks might have more savings or assets (like that superannuation or home equity), and perhaps may be more trusting or unfamiliar with the tricks of online fraud. It’s a sad reality: while looking for love online can result in happy relationships for many, there are also serious risks involved.
So, how can you protect yourself without becoming too cynical to enjoy meeting someone new? The key is vigilance and a healthy dose of skepticism with anyone you haven’t met in person. Some red flags to watch out for include: a stranger professing love very quickly, before you’ve even met; someone who has endless excuses for why they can’t meet face-to-face or even video chat (they claim to be overseas, on an oil rig, caring for a sick relative – there’s always a reason); and of course, any request for money or financial information is a huge warning sign.
Never, ever send money or share bank details with someone you haven’t met in person – no matter how convincing their story or how kind they seem. Legitimate new friends or partners do not ask you to pay their bills or invest in their schemes, period.
It’s also wise to talk to family or friends about any new online romance. Often, an outside perspective can spot inconsistencies or suspect details that are hard to see when you’re in the emotional bubble of a budding relationship. Do some detective work too: perform a reverse image search of their profile picture, and ask plenty of questions. Scammers often slip up with contradictory answers and poor excuses because they’re juggling multiple victims. By staying alert to these tactics, you can enjoy the benefits of online dating while steering clear of the heartbreak (and financial ruin) a scam can cause.
If you’re unsure, remember that government resources like the ACCC’s Scamwatch website and the new National Anti-Scam Centre provide up-to-date alerts on current scammer ploys. Many banks also offer guidance, since they’ve seen an uptick in customers being tricked.
The bottom line: trust your gut. If something feels off about that charming stranger who always has a reason he can’t video chat – or whose life seems a bit too dramatic – step back and reconsider. It’s far better to miss out on a maybe-romance than to fall victim to a con that wipes out your savings.
Embracing Love, With Eyes Wide Open
As older Australians venture into the dating world, there’s a lot to celebrate. It takes courage to put yourself out there after a lifetime of experiences, and finding someone to hold hands with on the journey ahead is a beautiful thing. The emotional and health benefits of companionship are real – from boosting mental wellbeing to possibly even extending your life. Society is finally recognizing that love has no age limit, and more support and opportunities exist for seniors to mingle, whether through technology or community events. In many ways, it’s the best time in history to be dating in your 60s or 70s.
Yet, it’s equally important to go in with eyes wide open. This isn’t the carefree dating of our teens and twenties. We carry both the treasures and the trials of experience now – be it financial assets that need protecting, or the wisdom to know what we truly want in a partner. The financial pitfalls of later-life dating are not about scaring anyone off, but about empowering older daters to love safely and smartly. Have the hard conversations early, protect your independence, and don’t be shy to seek professional advice (think of a financial planner or lawyer as part of your support team, like a couples counsellor for your bank account!).
Likewise, staying alert to scams is just a modern necessity. It’s unfortunate that we must be a bit wary when seeking connection, but a few precautions can spare you unimaginable pain. Remember that genuine love will respect your boundaries and your security. Any relationship that pressures you into secrecy or financial compromise is not one you want.
At the end of the day, an old proverb comes to mind: “Trust in God, but tie up your camel.” In other words, go ahead and open your heart, but lock your wallet until you’re absolutely sure. Ask questions, enjoy the process, and take your time. Good people are out there, and many seniors do find deeply fulfilling relationships that enrich their autumn years.
So whether you’re downloading a dating app for the first time, striking up a flirtation at the bowling club, or rekindling a connection with an old friend – approach romance with optimism and a pinch of caution. The rewards can be tremendous, and a little foresight will help ensure your new love story is filled with happiness, not financial regret.
And finally, a question to ponder: As we embrace the prospect of love later in life – with all its emotional benefits and potential risks – how can we best balance protecting our hearts and our assets while diving into the next great adventure?
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