Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven
The day finally arrived: Forrest Gump dies and goes to heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St Peter himself.
St Peter says, "Well Forrest, it's certainly good to see you. I must inform you that the place is filling up fast and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short and you have to pass before you can get into heaven."
The questions are:
1) What days in the week begin with the letter T?
2) How many seconds are there in a year?
3) What is God's first name?
Forrest says, "Well the first one- how many days in the week begin with the letter T? That is a easy one. That'd be Today and Tomorrow."
St Peter opened his eyes wide and said, "Forrest that's not what I was thinking... but I will give you credit for that answer. How about the next one," He asked, "How many seconds in a year?"
"Now that is harder!" says Forrest, "but I think and thunk and I guess the only answer could be twelve."
Astounded, St Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"
"There's gotta be twelve," he said, "January 2nd, February 2nd, March the second."
"Hold it," interrupts St Peter, "I see where you are going with this, and I'll have to give you credit for that one too."
Lets go on with the last and final question,"Can you tell me God's first name?"
"Sure," Forrest replied, "It's Andy."
"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter, "OK I can understand how you came up with your answers to the first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name of Andy as the first name of God?"
"That was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied.
"ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."
St Peter opens the Pearly Gates and said, "Run Forrest, run!