[Skipton]

Finding The Right Spot!​

A luxury cruise liner is about to leave Southampton Harbour when the engine breaks down:
Every mechanic tries everything all they can think of to get it running,
but no luck. Desperate, the captain begins asking if there's any mechanics on board.
A retired old sailor steps forward and says. "I have 50 years' experience as a navy mechanic, maybe I can help."
They show him the engine and after looking it over for a few minutes,
he grabs a ballpein hammer, walks over to one of many pipes jutting
from the engine and taps it with the hammer.
The engine roars back to life, humming like the first day it was used.
The captain thanks the man profusely and says.
"just write up a bill and I'll personally see to it you're compensated for saving this voyage."
The old guy scribbles on a slip of paper and hands it to the captain.
It says....hit engine with hammer- £10,000.
The captain is outraged. "I appreciate what you've done,
but how can you possibly justify that price for just hitting the engine with a hammer?"
The old sailor grabs the paper, scribbles some more and hands it back. Now it says...
Hitting engine with hammer - £5.
Knowing exactly where to hit engine with hammer - £9,995

 

[Macarj]

Finding The Right Spot!​

A luxury cruise liner is about to leave Southampton Harbour when the engine breaks down:
Every mechanic tries everything all they can think of to get it running,
but no luck. Desperate, the captain begins asking if there's any mechanics on board.
A retired old sailor steps forward and says. "I have 50 years' experience as a navy mechanic, maybe I can help."
They show him the engine and after looking it over for a few minutes,
he grabs a ballpein hammer, walks over to one of many pipes jutting
from the engine and taps it with the hammer.
The engine roars back to life, humming like the first day it was used.
The captain thanks the man profusely and says.
"just write up a bill and I'll personally see to it you're compensated for saving this voyage."
The old guy scribbles on a slip of paper and hands it to the captain.
It says....hit engine with hammer- £10,000.
The captain is outraged. "I appreciate what you've done,
but how can you possibly justify that price for just hitting the engine with a hammer?"
The old sailor grabs the paper, scribbles some more and hands it back. Now it says...
Hitting engine with hammer - £5.
Knowing exactly where to hit engine with hammer - £9,995

You got what you payed for

 

[Senor]

I have read similar ones previously. Experience does count but try telling that to a 25 year old.

 

[Vet543]

THIS NOT A GOOD JOKE, IT IS GREAT JOKE.
A married guy on the Sunshine Coast, won 20 million on PowerBall.
He decided that him and his wife would go on a world tour.
And the inevitable happening when his wife said,"couldn't we take Mum along she has never been out of Australia?"
After a while he said OK reluctantly.
Then when making the final arrangements at the travel agency. Mother-in-law wanted to include Jeruaselum and the birth place of Christ.
He was NO WAY ...but you won't win with two women wanting to go to Jerusalum .. so off they go and he insisted on going to Jerusalum first to get that out of the way.
WELL. IT HAPPENED... the Mother-in-law passed on while in Jerusalum.
The local undertaked offered a beautiful funeral service saying that because she died in Jerusalum she was entitled to be buried there also.
Now the husband put his foot down saying NO WAY, WE PUT HER ON A PLANE BACK TO AUSTRALIA.
The undertaker explainsed that his funeral would cost no more that $1,000 and besides millions of people would love to be buried here where Jesus was buried also.
The husband flatly denied the offer and said he would pay the $26,000 to send her back to Australia.
The stunned understaker said simply WHY?
The husband drew him aside and whispered , Quite some time ago a guy was buried here and 3 days later he rose from the dead ..AND I AM NOT TAKING THAT RISK ...

 

[Vet543]

Good joke

 

[WADuck]

Moral of the story Don't stuff around old guys.