Ask Joy: Negotiating Your Rights And Wishes

Note from the Editor:
This article was kindly written for the SDC by retired psychologist/ member @Joy Straw.

As we get older, there are many decisions that require us to voice our rights and our wishes. It is very often necessary to let people know what you want in order to save the pain of making decisions later when emotions become overwhelming or inhibit appropriate decisions. Throughout life, we regularly make decisions that can be life-changing or can affect the whole family. As we get older, we often become reluctant to make some of these final decisions.

We’ve navigated asking the boss for a raise, getting rid of uninvited guests, and we’ve made decisions about how much babysitting we will do with grandkids and even how many children we will have. But sometimes, things that require us to state our wishes and exercise our rights can be quite difficult. Why?

Sponsored
We lost a daughter in 2009, Sara wasn't 19. Life was very hard for so many reasons not just losing her, people don't understand the Super Rules which are way different from what people think. Super beneficiaries need to be updated regularly, even if it's the same person, just so it can't be challenged.
If young ones work they need to have something in writing, at least get them to review their Super, our daughters was not even sighted by us even though under 18 needs parents signature for it to go ahead and be accepted.
From this experience we all have funeral planes and wills, we have spoken to our children and each other about what we want to happen in case of illness, hospitalization and or diminished capacity. The kids (adults with own family's) know exactly what we want as we sat and talked about it.
I could go on forever and tell you about what we found out through experience, unfortunately, but please do something as our children do sometimes leave us to soon, don't think it won't happen to you, it does, and when it does you realize there are things you should have talked about.
 
  • Love
Reactions: PattiB
We lost a daughter in 2009, Sara wasn't 19. Life was very hard for so many reasons not just losing her, people don't understand the Super Rules which are way different from what people think. Super beneficiaries need to be updated regularly, even if it's the same person, just so it can't be challenged.
If young ones work they need to have something in writing, at least get them to review their Super, our daughters was not even sighted by us even though under 18 needs parents signature for it to go ahead and be accepted.
From this experience we all have funeral planes and wills, we have spoken to our children and each other about what we want to happen in case of illness, hospitalization and or diminished capacity. The kids (adults with own family's) know exactly what we want as we sat and talked about it.
I could go on forever and tell you about what we found out through experience, unfortunately, but please do something as our children do sometimes leave us to soon, don't think it won't happen to you, it does, and when it does you realize there are things you should have talked about.
Thank you Julieapol I’m so sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter at such a young age. It is so true that until we start to look into things there are often many things we don’t know about. Getting our affairs in order makes life a lot easier for those left be hind. Again I’m sorry for the pain you are going through but thank you for point out an important issue 💕
 

Join the conversation

News, deals, games, and bargains for Aussies over 60. From everyday expenses like groceries and eating out, to electronics, fashion and travel, the club is all about helping you make your money go further.

Seniors Discount Club

The SDC searches for the best deals, discounts, and bargains for Aussies over 60. From everyday expenses like groceries and eating out, to electronics, fashion and travel, the club is all about helping you make your money go further.
  1. New members
  2. Jokes & fun
  3. Photography
  4. Nostalgia / Yesterday's Australia
  5. Food and Lifestyle
  6. Money Saving Hacks
  7. Offtopic / Everything else
  • We believe that retirement should be a time to relax and enjoy life, not worry about money. That's why we're here to help our members make the most of their retirement years. If you're over 60 and looking for ways to save money, connect with others, and have a laugh, we’d love to have you aboard.
  • Advertise with us

User Menu

Enjoyed Reading our Story?

  • Share this forum to your loved ones.
Change Weather Postcode×
Change Petrol Postcode×