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Granddad Joke of the Day Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'racism' these days. A customer asked a shop assistant, "In what aisle could I find the Guinness?" The shop assistant asks, "Are you Irish?" The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something...

Grandad Joke of the day.I Need A 710

Tip Trips I went to the tip one day in Canberra and found this silver metal box, opened it and there was an electric drill (with power cord) took it home plugged it in and it didn't work, a bit of tinkering, found the problem, fixed it used it for about 20 years, moved to Old had a garage sale...

Grandad Joke of the Day Sean & Pat, two Irish government mechanical engineers standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. “We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole,” said Billy, “but we don't have a ladder.” The woman said, “Hand...

He should have listened A bookie had had a winning day at Randwick. A man with a speech impediment came along and said I just had mmmyyy 5ttt. The bookie said Nickoff I didn't offer 5 to 1 on any race. The other man persisted and continued, my 5ttt. The bookie got annoyed and since he had a...

A Cowboy Little boy in a cowboy suit with boots, spurs and toy guns goes into an Ice cream parlour. Lady behind the counter says what would you like. Boy whips out the guns twirls them around points them straight at the woman and says "gimme a ice cream sundae" then slips the guns back in the...

Don't Argue. The Silent Treatment A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realised that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5.00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the...

Grandad Joke of the Day Sean & Pat, two Irish government mechanical engineers standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. “We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole,” said Billy, “but we don't have a ladder.” The woman said, “Hand...

Oh Dear.

Sunrise on the Maroochydore River. Sunshine Coast Queensland.

Maybe I Need a Drink

Counselling that works A desperate looking woman stood poised on the edge of a cliff, about to jump off. An old homeless Aussie bloke who was wandering by stopped and said: "Look, since you'll be dead in a few minutes, and it won't matter to you, how about a quickie before you go?” She...

Well that was easy

Great grand dad Joke of the week

Granddad Joke of the day A man flying in a hot air balloon realises he is lost. Reducing altitude, he spotted a man on the ground and defended to shouting range. “Excuse me” he shouted. “Can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am’. The...

Great Grand Dad Joke of the day A glass of wine To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine and those who don't and are always seen with a bottle of water in their hand: As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, In beer there is freedom, In water there is bacteria. In a number of...

Great Granddad Joke

Blind Cowboy

Best Divorce Letter Ever Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. … Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last...