Search results

Sells Itself

What do you call the Spanish man fella who was discharged from hospital? Manuel

On a lighter note: Wanting a new pet, I was rather doubtful about the ad outside a pet shop saying, ‘Netherlands Cat for sale’. So I went in and asked the assistant about it's pedigree and said, “Excuse me, how Dutch is that Moggie in the Window?”

We Three old Kings

MOOOOooooo

The Young Doctor A young doctor had moved to a small community near Broken Hill to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds so that the community would become used to their new doctor. At the first house a woman complains...

Quick Husband gets home and tells his wife “Quick, get me a beer before it starts.” She gets the beer. He chugs it and says “Quick, get me another before it starts.” She obliges. Husband again chugs it and says “Quick, get me another beer before it starts.” The wife replies “If you...

Sensitivity Training Reasons for Sensitivity Training for Men I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair but, by turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing. I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning! The wife suggested I get...

I'M NOT CLUMSY IT'S JUST THE FLOOR HATES ME THE TABLES AND CHAIRS ARE BULLIES AND THE WALL GETS IN THE WAY..

Intelligentsia

Takeaway

Jihadists "If we can manage to convince the Chinese that Jihadists' bollocks/testicles are aphrodisiacs, within ten years they'll have disappeared..."

Computer Apple Computer has announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play HiFi music in women’s breast implants. The iTit will cost between $499 and $699 depending on speaker size. This is considered a major breakthrough because women have always complained...

Out Walking I met a bloke walking his dog today. He said "do you want to stroke my cocker spaniel?". I said "sure". In hindsight, I should have chosen the spaniel.

For many, the golden arches are a symbol of convenience and affordability. Used to be? not any more.

Someone in my area on days/nights of extreme cold I can smell then old wood fire. And I will say that if I had a fireplace proper, I'd be burning fire wood proper wood not any form of ersatz shite.

Now now, stop baiting them?

I'd be telling them to go F..k Themselves you carry out your when it suits me and thats hen I get home from work between the 6 and 7 PM I don't pay exorbitant rents to jump through hoops on your bloody whim