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Knock, knock. "Who's there"? "Jamaican". "Jamaican who"? "Jamaican me horny.'

Shopping trolley's are deliberately made to be a bastard to steer?

Does Dan Murphy's sell Chateau De Cardboard?

Have you ever made a joke that was taken the wrong way? More times than I care to remember, and no doubt will do so again. But the fact remains the some people can't fart without shitting themselves or conversely scratch their arse without making it bleed?

Writing in CAPITals is one of the foibles of the querty keyboard, you don't realise until after you've finished the sentence and lifes to short to back, so PHUCKIT?

$250 only with Travago?

One I've by ever since my told said it me? Whenever people wanted to borrow and I could afford to I always asked for something costing more for collateral there being no charges or drip feed repayments.

THIEVING BASTARDS ONE AND ALL, FROM TOP TO BOTTOM. CRY WE ALL.

Reading your post Petra I notice that a word seemed to be spelt wrong? there were three of them so it should have been cnuts? 👍😀

The court heard the men had claimed the pigeon was injured and they were trying to euthanise it. "It is simply wrong to say they were putting the pigeon out of its misery," It's a pity these three specimens of shite couldn't be euthanised??

Roof over your head or an out of focus photo of some old git wearing a bathrobe waving from a balcony?

Didn't have all this smart shite when I was working, why would I need it now, I'm not in any hurry to buy clean knickers, haven't shit in these ones yet?

I get fed up when speaking to someone that doesn't understand you. I don't speak "Pidgin" so I don't expect to speak to someone who doesn't keep asking me to repeat myself?

Yes, just before they close the lid?

I'm talking about this shite MDF being the new asbestos, I f you can't saw a piece of timber without a full face mask there's something wrong,plus you and I are buying different old furniture. I've never furniture bought containing asbestos

ALLEN KEYED SOMEONE'S TESLA?

PULLING SOMETHING?

Fraid not PERRY HOMO? A light shone in the night some way ahead Blue turned into green, then it was red And stirrin' the night, love music played The light I saw in the night was a Penny Arcade "Step up and play", each machine seemed to say As I walked round and round the Penny Arcade Just ring...

[Chorus] Magic moments When two hearts are caring Magic moments Memories we've been sharing [Verse 1] I'll never forget the moment we kissed The night of the hayride The way that we hugged to try to keep warm While taking a sleigh ride [Chorus] Magic moments Memories we've been sharing Magic...