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Sep 21, 2022
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The Navy Chief back stepped

“A Navy Chief noticed a new seaman and barked at him, “Get over here! What’s your name sailor?”
“John,” the new seaman replied.
“Look, I don’t know what kind of bleeding-heart pansy crap they’re teaching sailors in boot camp nowadays, but I don’t call anyone by his first name,” the chief scowled. “It breeds familiarity, and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my sailors by their last names only; Smith, Jones, Baker, whatever. And you are to refer to me as ‘Chief’. Do I make myself clear?”
“Aye, Aye Chief!”
“Now that we’ve got that straight, what’s your last name?”
The seaman sighed. “Darling, My name is John Darling, Chief.”
“Okay, John, here’s what I want you to do.”
 
When an elderly couple woke up one morning, the husband asked "Did you hear that terrible storm last night?"
"No" said the wife, "Was there thunder?"
"The worst thunder I have ever heard. I thought it was going to bring the house down."
"Why didn't you wake me?" she snapped. "You know I can never sleep when it thunders."
 

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