Can Anyone help me with Aged care Infornation

Suzanne rose · Jul 18, 2025

Can Anyone help me with Aged care Infornation

I'm looking at bringing my mother to Sydney from Taree .
She wants to go into independent living then transition into the nursing home later on.

She wants to come to Sydney so she can be close to me so I can visit her regularly and also take her on day trips.

My mother has very little money and doesn't own a house. She is currently renting a private house with my brother.
My brother has been her career for the past 2 years but unfortunately he is an alcoholic and there is a lot of tension between them as he blames her for alot of stuff from his childhood.

My mother was far from a good mother infact she was never a mother. I told my brother to leave the past behind but he can't.

Can someone please advise me on how I do this and is there large cost involved.

I can't look after her permanently due to my health plus my energy goes to my kids helping with my grandchildren

I appreciate any information anyone can give me

Suzanne

Nan097 · Friday at 7:46 AM

I'm in Queensland but you can check out retirement villages in Sydney for rentals.

aquarius123 · Friday at 8:02 AM

Suzanne Rose, at least your mother won't have any problems with assets. I suggest you get in touch with Anglicare, https://www.anglicare.com.au/ or any of the other church organisations for a start. They could have a facility near you or could suggest an independent living organisation that does.

Bob Patterson · Friday at 9:04 AM

Suzanne , Try contacting My Aged Care ; www.myagedcare.gov.au/assessment/apply-online Or phone 1800200422 . I hope this helps .

Suzanne rose · Friday at 9:10 AM

Thank you, everyone, but now my mother has decided she wants to stay in her home.

At least the last week of ringing around has prepared me for what is to come and I believe sooner than later.

I think my mother was hoping to move in with me

Bob Patterson · Friday at 9:13 AM

All the best Suzanne .

phantomrose102 · Friday at 9:47 AM

https://www.myagedcare.gov.au/ will help

Ricci · Friday at 9:58 AM

Hey Suzanne, having a long distance parent is a pain, or that's what my son jokingly says.
Let her have her independence while she can enjoy it, she won't thank you for taking her away from everything she knows and is comfortable with.
Make some time and schedule regular meaningful phone calls that go beyond the "how are you" and help her feel connected to the outside world while keeping you informed about her health and state of mind. I speak to my son at least twice a week, for a minimum of an hour each time, we laugh, we put the world to right, we speak about what's going on in our lives and we both come away with a sense of everything is good and as it should be.
Hope this helps you.

Gezzabel · Friday at 11:16 AM

Hi Susanne. You are the recipe queen! Moving forward to your beloved Mother. Sounds crazy, but have you considered the “granny “ flat scenario? Depends on finances of course. Don’t know your situation, but everything costs money. If she’s an alcoholic, she does have the money, believe it or not. Her habit is very expensive! It’s easy for everyone to say to you, get her off the grog. A granny flat wouldn’t come cheap, but if you get in touch with Council, they will assist you, as they have a duty care, as do doctors. Council has social workers, who will assist you. But I am afraid if she’s a gambler, or a drinker as well, that’s a problem. I suggest that you contact council, and don’t mention the alcohol, or you will drop to the bottom of the list. You are a generous person, as I see your recipes every day almost, and also your generosity in giving away nice outfits to people less fortunate. It’s time that we all chipped in and did something nice for you. There’s also portable granny flats available, but not if she continues to drink. Your local hospital has unlimited resources too, so consider getting in touch with them too . Remember that gets the oil ! Please keep me posted. Gezzabel.

Suzanne rose · Friday at 11:48 AM

Ricci said:
Hey Suzanne, having a long distance parent is a pain, or that's what my son jokingly says.
Let her have her independence while she can enjoy it, she won't thank you for taking her away from everything she knows and is comfortable with.
Make some time and schedule regular meaningful phone calls that go beyond the "how are you" and help her feel connected to the outside world while keeping you informed about her health and state of mind. I speak to my son at least twice a week, for a minimum of an hour each time, we laugh, we put the world to right, we speak about what's going on in our lives and we both come away with a sense of everything is good and as it should be.
Hope this helps you.

I speak to her twice a week. Problem is she is having a lot of falls, she has a lady from age care come in and shower her and I believe her Parkinson is getting worst.

The problem is my mother and brother clashing. They argue like there is no tomorrow.
My brother is an alcoholic and ex drug addict . He was treated really badly as a kid by my mother and her partners. He was abused by her partner in more than one way.
He has been in and out of juvenile homes and jails all his life.
He now cooks for mum and cleans, but unfortunately, he often remembers his childhood.
I feel he has done well looking after her, especially how he was looked after durning his so-called childhood.
My mother now has no one except my brother and me. All our other siblings will have nothing to do with her, nor will my aunt who us her younger sister.

Wombat2u2004 · Friday at 3:54 PM

Suzanne rose said:
Thank you, everyone, but now my mother has decided she wants to stay in her home.

At least the last week of ringing around has prepared me for what is to come and I believe sooner than later.

I think my mother was hoping to move in with me

Yes, I was thinking that too.
She sounds uncomfortable living with your brother.
All the best to her anyway.

Suzanne rose · Friday at 4:15 PM

Wombat2u2004 said:
Yes, I was thinking that too.
She sounds uncomfortable living with your brother.
All the best to her anyway.

And he with her

Clancieblue · Friday at 4:18 PM

Suzanne ,I believe it is a requirement of the Government that Aged care facilities have at least five free places available for people on low income with no funding behind them . My aged care will provide you with that information and if she already has a provider, they may be able to assist you, especially if they are church run. Anglicare, Uniting care and Baptist care are all good facilities.
Good luck, it may pay you to be prepared.

Suzanne rose · Friday at 4:26 PM

Clancieblue said:
Suzanne ,I believe it is a requirement of the Government that Aged care facilities have at least five free places available for people on low income with no funding behind them . My aged care will provide you with that information and if she already has a provider, they may be able to assist you, especially if they are church run. Anglicare, Uniting care and Baptist care are all good facilities.
Good luck, it may pay you to be prepared.

Thank you

and yes I do need to be prepared ,last week showed me that

Still Ebby · Friday at 6:57 PM

Suzanne rose said:
Thank you, everyone, but now my mother has decided she wants to stay in her home.

At least the last week of ringing around has prepared me for what is to come and I believe sooner than later.

I think my mother was hoping to move in with me

Miss Chris · Friday at 9:09 PM

Gezzabel said:
Hi Susanne. You are the recipe queen! Moving forward to your beloved Mother. Sounds crazy, but have you considered the “granny “ flat scenario? Depends on finances of course. Don’t know your situation, but everything costs money. If she’s an alcoholic, she does have the money, believe it or not. Her habit is very expensive! It’s easy for everyone to say to you, get her off the grog. A granny flat wouldn’t come cheap, but if you get in touch with Council, they will assist you, as they have a duty care, as do doctors. Council has social workers, who will assist you. But I am afraid if she’s a gambler, or a drinker as well, that’s a problem. I suggest that you contact council, and don’t mention the alcohol, or you will drop to the bottom of the list. You are a generous person, as I see your recipes every day almost, and also your generosity in giving away nice outfits to people less fortunate. It’s time that we all chipped in and did something nice for you. There’s also portable granny flats available, but not if she continues to drink. Your local hospital has unlimited resources too, so consider getting in touch with them too . Remember that gets the oil ! Please keep me posted. Gezzabel.

I think it’s the brother that has the problem…not the mother..

DLHM · Friday at 9:34 PM

Suzanne rose said:
I speak to her twice a week. Problem is she is having a lot of falls, she has a lady from age care come in and shower her and I believe her Parkinson is getting worst.

The problem is my mother and brother clashing. They argue like there is no tomorrow.
My brother is an alcoholic and ex drug addict . He was treated really badly as a kid by my mother and her partners. He was abused by her partner in more than one way.
He has been in and out of juvenile homes and jails all his life.
He now cooks for mum and cleans, but unfortunately, he often remembers his childhood.
I feel he has done well looking after her, especially how he was looked after durning his so-called childhood.
My mother now has no one except my brother and me. All our other siblings will have nothing to do with her, nor will my aunt who us her younger sister.

I apologise in advance for sounding callous and harsh, but from what you’ve said, your mum wants to wipe out memories of her past mistakes. It seems to me she wants to use you because of your kindness, by trying to make you feel guilty.

Now she wants you to come to her rescue. She is only thinking of herself.

You’ve done very well for yourself and your family with little, if any help from her. Look at the problems and situations that you’ve had to face over the years with no help from her. Where was she then? You’ve worked hard to where you are now.

Of course the decision is yours. But you need to live your life for you the way you want; being there for your hubby, kids and grandkids. Your passions with cooking brings great pleasure to others. Your generosity certainly goes noticed and appreciated.

Maybe I’m out of line because I’ve never met you and am only going on what you’ve posted in the past.

Your mum lived her life the way she chose to. She needs to learn why her decisions have led her to her situation now. She needs to own her problems and perhaps speak with someone whose trained to help people deal with whatever is going on in her life.

I hope you won’t let her treat you as a doormat. You (and your family), don’t deserve that.

Sorry, I’ve probably sounded like a b*tch. But this is from the heart. I truly dislike good people being treated badly and being taken advantage of.

I do hope you will be happy with whatever you decide to do. You’ve shown yourself to be strong, but fair. Be fair to yourself.

Wombat2u2004 · 2025-07-26T00:35:09+1000

DLHM said:
I apologise in advance for sounding callous and harsh, but from what you’ve said, your mum wants to wipe out memories of her past mistakes. It seems to me she wants to use you because of your kindness, by trying to make you feel guilty.

Now she wants you to come to her rescue. She is only thinking of herself.

You’ve done very well for yourself and your family with little, if any help from her. Look at the problems and situations that you’ve had to face over the years with no help from her. Where was she then? You’ve worked hard to where you are now.

Of course the decision is yours. But you need to live your life for you the way you want; being there for your hubby, kids and grandkids. Your passions with cooking brings great pleasure to others. Your generosity certainly goes noticed and appreciated.

Maybe I’m out of line because I’ve never met you and am only going on what you’ve posted in the past.

Your mum lived her life the way she chose to. She needs to learn why her decisions have led her to her situation now. She needs to own her problems and perhaps speak with someone whose trained to help people deal with whatever is going on in her life.

I hope you won’t let her treat you as a doormat. You (and your family), don’t deserve that.

Sorry, I’ve probably sounded like a b*tch. But this is from the heart. I truly dislike good people being treated badly and being taken advantage of.

I do hope you will be happy with whatever you decide to do. You’ve shown yourself to be strong, but fair. Be fair to yourself.

Very well said.

Still Ebby · 2025-07-26T10:35:43+1000

Wombat2u2004 said:
Very well said.

Yes well said Debs . l didn't see the post but you don't seem the kind of person to be unkind

Jumping Jack Flash · 2025-07-26T13:08:54+1000

Wombat2u2004 said:
Very well said.

Ditto ......

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