Grieving mother slams Centrelink’s ‘unfair’ rule: ‘It's very wrong’

The pain of losing a child is unimaginable, and the grief that follows is a burden no parent should have to bear alone.

Yet, for Patty van Duijn, an Adelaide mother, the heartbreak was compounded by a Centrelink rule that she describes as 'absolutely disgusting’.



Patty was over 19 weeks into her pregnancy when she faced the devastating reality of terminating her pregnancy due to complications.

The loss of her son Mason was a profound trauma, one that was followed by the physical and emotional ordeal of giving birth to a stillborn child.


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Patty criticised Centrelink’s ‘disgusting’ rule. Image source: Shutterstock



But when she sought financial support from Centrelink to help her through this difficult time, she was met with a disappointing response.

Centrelink's Stillborn Baby Payment, a one-off lump sum of $4,059.17 designed to assist grieving parents, requires a gestation period of at least 20 weeks or a birth weight of at least 400 grams.

Mason, at 230 grams and just six days shy of the 20-week mark, did not meet these criteria.

As a result, Patty was deemed ineligible for the payment, forcing her to consider returning to her hospitality job less than two weeks after her loss.



She shared the emotional ordeal to a media outlet, saying, ‘I'm still going through this whole process of giving birth and holding a baby that's not alive. It's very traumatic and really hard, but now I have to think about going back to work.’

Patty criticised the rule as ‘absolutely disgusting’ and shared that it is ‘unfair’ she had undergone similar trauma and grief but was not able to access the help available to mothers in her situation.

‘It shouldn't matter how big or small or how long... it's my baby with arms, ten toes, fingers,’ she said.

‘I'm just unsure of who made this decision, and if they actually know what people go through, but a week shouldn't be a difference because it's still the experience, the trauma and everything that comes with it,’ Patty added.

It is understood that the Department of Social Services set the policy, and while Centrelink cannot grant leniency based on individual circumstances, they have stated that a representative will contact her to explore other supports available.



A spokesperson from the Department of Social Services stated, ‘the Australian Government recognises the tragic loss and trauma of miscarriage.’

‘While a medical professional must certify a stillborn child was delivered for families to receive Stillborn Baby Payment, other supports are available through Services Australia including counselling and support to connect with local services.’

‘And depending on an individual's circumstances and employment, they may also be entitled to paid or unpaid leave following a miscarriage,’ they added.

Patty's situation is further complicated by her medical history of Inflammatory Bowel Disease (IBD), which contributed to the complications in her pregnancy.

With her partner Lee Simpson working as a chef, the couple is struggling to make ends meet on his salary alone. The emotional toll is immense, and the financial pressure only adds to their distress.



‘It's only been a week and a half and now I have to think about going back to work because we can't afford to pay bills and rent if I don't work,’ she shared.

In response to her situation, Patty has taken action by setting up a GoFundMe page, not only to seek support for herself and Lee but also to raise awareness and advocate for change in the policy.

She hopes that by sharing her story, she can prevent other families from enduring the same hardship.

‘It's very wrong,’ she argued. ‘I want it to be looked into, not for us now, it's too late, but for other people going through this, so they don't have to go through what I am right now.’
Key Takeaways
  • Patty van Duijn from Adelaide experienced the loss of her baby at over 19 weeks but couldn't access Centrelink's Stillborn Baby Payment because she was six days short of the required 20-week gestation period.
  • Centrelink defines a stillborn child as one who has reached at least 20 weeks' gestation or weighs at least 400 grams at birth; Patty's baby weighed 230 grams.
  • Patty criticised the rule as 'absolutely disgusting' and unfair for not considering the trauma and grief experienced by mothers in her situation.
  • Despite her circumstances, Patty has received no leniency from Centrelink, with the Department of Social Services stating other supports are available, and she is now calling for a change to the rule to help others in her position.
Our thoughts and prayers go to Patty and her husband during this difficult time.

What do you think about Centrelink’s Stillborn Baby Payment criteria, members? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
 
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Why would she want a baby if she could not afford to look after it once born. I don't know her or his circumstances but surely you would not bring a baby into the world if you could not afford it or look after it as she said her finances would not allow her to have time off, with or without a baby. If she did have time off what about Day Care Costs, nappies, baby food, she can't afford the Bills on one wage, there is something that does not seem right. I really feel for her for the loss of a child and I cant imagine how that feels never going through it, but i do have a daughter and daughter inlaw that have been through it. I pray that she will get back on her feet and down the track give birth to a child that will give her the joy she so deeply wants.
 
My son died of SIDS at almost 21 months and we got NO help at all from Centrelink...no one reached out to us ...we only had support from family and some friends...they had no idea of the devastation this had caused...we had to take out a loan to cover the funeral expenses...at least support is there...although the guidelines for this should be inclusive..
 
Yes, the loss of a baby is a traumatic and heart breaking event, but that doesn't mean that taxpayers need to financially support this event. If you don't meet the criteria, stop trying to manipulate the media purely for your own selfish financial gain. Grieve quietly, go back to work and stop whining.
 
Why didn't centrelink explore the other options at the time of not approving payment. Maybe centrelink needs protocols based on humanity rather than a set of unwavering rules
It seems you are forgetting that Centrelink payments are not government money, it is taxpayers money. It is a parents responsibility to care for, pay for, and be there for children. It is not governments duty nor responsibility.
 
Why should the govt have to pay for everything. They have to draw a line somewhere.
That's a bit harsh. Do you know anyone who has undergone the psychological and physical trauma of having a stillborn? Probably not.

Then again, you may condone the superfluous handouts given to new immigrants. Do you?
 
While these people have my deepest sympathy I'm afraid that everybody these days seems to expect the government to pick up the tab for everything
Terrible things happen to people every day, we can't expect the government to come to the rescue all the time.
I was not even aware that there
was such a payment but obviously there needs to be a cut off date otherwise where does it stop.
I wish this couple all the best for the future. Seeing their financial situation doesn't appear to be very stable perhaps they should reconsider having a child at this time, until things improve financially for them, having a child is a serious and expensive decision.
 
This baby did not meet any of the criteria for Centrelink payment. He was under the required gestation being only 19 weeks & grossly underweight at just 230g of the required 400g. Looking at another side of this unfortunate situation, I believe it still applies that a stillborn/miscarriage under 20 weeks gestation does not have to be buried so they do not have to carry the burden of having a funeral - it is their choice, not the law, if they do decide to go down this route.
She is not the first to lose a baby & won't be the last (unfortunately). However, this does not mean that the rest of society has to carry the financial cost to her because she cannot afford to live if she doesn't go back to work. I'm going to be quite crass here & say "Get over it" and go back to work.
 
This baby did not meet any of the criteria for Centrelink payment. He was under the required gestation being only 19 weeks & grossly underweight at just 230g of the required 400g. Looking at another side of this unfortunate situation, I believe it still applies that a stillborn/miscarriage under 20 weeks gestation does not have to be buried so they do not have to carry the burden of having a funeral - it is their choice, not the law, if they do decide to go down this route.
She is not the first to lose a baby & won't be the last (unfortunately). However, this does not mean that the rest of society has to carry the financial cost to her because she cannot afford to live if she doesn't go back to work. I'm going to be quite crass here & say "Get over it" and go back to work.
What an asshole you are. Where your heart should be there is a rock. One day this will go back on you. How could you be so cold, cruel and heartless. Shame on you.
 
While these people have my deepest sympathy I'm afraid that everybody these days seems to expect the government to pick up the tab for everything
Terrible things happen to people every day, we can't expect the government to come to the rescue all the time.
I was not even aware that there
was such a payment but obviously there needs to be a cut off date otherwise where does it stop.
I wish this couple all the best for the future. Seeing their financial situation doesn't appear to be very stable perhaps they should reconsider having a child at this time, until things improve financially for them, having a child is a serious and expensive decision.
The Government should be willing to come to the rescue. What the heck difference should it have made if the baby was smaller etc. it was the exact same trauma the woman has had to suffer.
 
We are step by step going backwards as a country led by unfeeling, unthinking Politicians. The super dickheads that made up this rule ought to be shot. I am so sorry this has happened to you.
Do you think there should be no rules for anything, that is a rather stupid statement.
I feel extremely sorry for these people, but I received nothing when I lost my child much later on than this.
When you plan to have children you need to be in a financial position to afford them and that includes covering the costs if something goes wrong which I had to do. It never entered my head to think that anyone but ourselves should cover these costs.
 
Firstly my heart and prayers go out to this couple. Still birth and miscarriage is a great loss and very hard to explain to another who has never experienced it. The pain emotionally is nothing you can explain.
Sadly Centre Link putting a weight and week of pregnancy for a a payment is tuff.
Maybe Centre Link could consider a time limit example Three months of payments to give time for physical recovery no amount of time will heal the emotional side of the loss.
I truly don't have an answer to how many weeks or weight a baby should be for a grief loss.
But l do believe you do need time to heal.
Life is very difficult for people for many reasons but to know you can just get by for a few months financially could just help a little.
Please Centre Link reassess this payment kind regards Vicki
 

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